Locking your heart away with me
by origliasso
Summary: AU. Emily's sent down for a crime she didn't do, Prison life isnt as it seems with Miss Campbell around.
1. Chapter 1

**Hey! this is just something new I had in mind, again I'm not that sure.**

**make sure to read and leave a review if you like it :)**

**thanks x**

'_We the jury find the defendant guilty of attempted murder'_

Isn't it weird how your life can flash in front of your eyes in a sequence right before you think it's actually over? The strangest part is that when mine flashed it wasn't even the most important parts, almost as if all the memories that didn't stay with me were here now and very important to my being. All those times I'd fallen over and grazed my knee or the times when I'd cheated on my French exam, why were they here? I couldn't help thinking that there must be more important things to remember now, there must be. In the end I was probably just distracting myself from my torn future which was playing out right in front of my eyes. It all started the night of my 18th birthday, time for celebration and joy, oh how wrong could I have been.

Me and my twin Katie, we used to have nights were we would just sit up planning our 18th, her telling me how important it was and me chipping in Ideas of how we'd spend it, obviously by time we got older we looked back on these ideas and completely pissed ourselves laughing at them, swapping bouncy castles and pool parties for clubs and nights out on the town instead. Anyway April 21st, two weeks previously I'd just started an internship at a local magazine company, studying journalism in college really got me pumped for my future prospects, university, working at the best magazine in the world, becoming successful with my own business. you could only feel my anguish when the internship turned out to be more work than I bargained for, often keeping me as late as 10 in the night to print up late copies or reply to emails that the companies had received. In a twisted fucked up way I kind of blame my internship for where I am now.

I'd phoned Katie telling her how I was going to be late because I had to stay till 10 tonight, she wasn't angry but more disappointed, we wanted to make an appearance at the club together being as this was a special birthday, but a quote from my boss 'Birthdays won't cut it in the industry missy' and I kind of agreed with him. I agreed to meet everyone down there, rushing home after work, slipping on the new purple dress I'd recently purchased for this night and throwing my hair up in a more appropriate look, it was almost midnight by time I was running up park street, heels in my hand, purse clenched between my teeth as I was fixing the strap of my dress, stopping at the corner to fix my heels again.

This was until I heard a whimper come from the alley way beside me, First I thought it was a cat, it was such a winching and un human like sound you probably would of thought so yourself, but then it get louder, and the winching turned into wrenching and cries of pain, looking around there were literally 2 people in the street, me and a old women who was about to turn out of the road anyway, so I walked into the alley way now marked as one of the biggest mistakes of my life, and there she was, mustn't of older than me, rolled up in a ball on the damp pavement, arms covered in bruise's rolling around in pain, I froze.

This is dangerous Emily, was my first thought but being who I am I instantly reached out for her, she flinches, look of fear spreading out across her face as she shifts her body away from me, she's been attacked.

'It's okay, I'll help you' she shakes her head looking behind my shoulder and the next thing I know I'm hit over the head and knocked to the floor just beside her 'what did I tell you about talking bitch?' I breathe and look up to see a girl probably my age standing over the other spitting insults down at her, as she shifts her eyes to me, I snap them shut, keeping the knocked out look so she doesn't do anything, the full time I thought my heart beat had given me away because Jesus it's the only thing I could hear right now. I noticed the black leather gloves the girl had on, and has stupid as it sounds I couldn't help but wondering why she was wearing them, it was a serious hot night. The next few minutes my question was going to be answered.

Because within a matter of seconds a scream is coming from the girl on the floor as a knife is plunged into her stomach, My eyes shoot open to witness the sight, breathing heavily I shift myself up throwing all my weight at the attacker until she stumbled back into the bin bags on the floor, confused she stands up 'bad choice' she spits before running forward, grabbing me by my shoulder, noticing she hasn't got the knife anymore I push her back ten times harder into the wall, this is before drunken voices echo down the alley way and the attacker starts to panic pushing me out of her way

'If you tell anybody I did this, I won't just find you and kill you, I'll fucking kill your family too jenny got it?' she threatens the bleeding girl on the floor, before wiping her hands down my dress and running down the opposite end of the alley, I immediately run over to the girl, cradling her head on my knee, knife still plunged into her stomach, not removing it because I know this is how internal bleeding starts 'You're going to be okay' I sooth her as she continues to cry 'Phone an ambulance!' I scream at the passing hen night as they all gawp down at me comforting the moaning girl.

_Guilty_

'You lying little bitch, she saved your life, I'm going to fucking kill you do you hear me?' Katie sobbed out at the top of her lungs from the stands in the court, banging her fist against the glass of the window pain, aiming her words at the victim sitting in the opposite part of the stand.

That's right. No CCTV, no evidence that there was even another girl there, and no justice for me. I wasn't just the innocent passerby anymore, I wasn't just the girl who tried to save somebody's life when I saw they were in danger, I was the attacker. The girl, now known as Jenny told the police what happened that night, how I'd jumped her in the alley way, How I demanded money off her, how I beat her up until she couldn't breathe anymore, and then how I launched the knife into her stomach telling her she was going to die. The black gloves proved the only finger prints on the knife were mine, when I tried to help it stop killing her even more. She couldn't look me in the eye through the whole trial, I wanted to cry at her, call her a fucking liar and how I wished I'd just left her and let her get finished off but I couldn't, I couldn't breathe, all I could do was watch my family break apart in the stands as the officer escorted me into the wooden door, my mum and Katie screaming the house down, getting threatened off the judge

'Mum' I scream, shaking with grief, feeling small next to this huge man who's handling me as if I'm dangerous 'I'm scared!' are my last plies before the door is shut in front of me and I'm lead down the stairs

'She's innocent!' are the last echoing words I hear in the court room, voice belonging to my mum.

**

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**

Sutton juvenile women's institute, I was still in shock by time I had arrived to the place, barely being able to even register my name when asked for it, next thing I knew I was being dragged into one of the small office rooms and asked to strip behind a curtain which didn't make me feel comfortable at all, she gave me a pity half smile

'everyone has to do it love, if you can't do the time...' she continues to babble as I roll my eyes, dragging off my court clothes, a neat white shirt and pencil skirt hit the floor, leaving me standing in front of this middle aged woman in my underwear, she then proceeded to check my body for any sharp items or drugs. I kind of had to laugh at this inside, I was stood here completely starker's in my underwear and she was checking me as if I had some secret pockets under my skin.

'all clear' she mutters under her breath, signalling me to get onto the scales so she can take my weight, she then proceeds to take my height, then hands me a dark grey pair of joggers and a simple black vest top, I look at her in distaste 'You'll have to wear these for now till your own clothes are checked, sharp items elimated, laces taken away' she ensures me, I nod sadly at her, slipping on the terrible clothes while she scribbles stuff down on her clip board.

After the full body medical check, I was taken in and believe me it wasn't a pretty sight, I stood out like a sore thumb, me and a prison officer walking past groups of butch looking women wearing the jail attire didn't exactly make me look like I'd been here for a while, the officer stopped, jigging his keys into the giant steel door then opening it was a loud creak. To my surprise inside there was a skinny brunette reading on the bottom bunk, barely losing her cool persona as I entered the room.

'Emily Fitch, this is Elizabeth Stonem' she raised her eyebrow at me, I continued to stare down at her as her fingers curled around the page she'd been reading in the book, he did a loud cough before continuing 'You'll have the top bunk, you'll be woken at 7am' he walked to the door again before turning around 'play nice girls alright?' he aimed the last part at Elizabeth, a smirk growing on her lips as she eyed me suspiciously up and down, then the steel door was bolted again and we were left alone. I stood awkwardly under her stare for a while, before deciding to try and get on my bunk, I fucking hated bunk beds, have done since I was young.

'Interesting' Elizabeth mutters from her bed, I freeze on the ladder, raising an eyebrow at her 'What's interesting?' I ask, a small smile grows on her face.

'Your hair' she points, I look up through my fringe 'it's red, different' she says, flicking the book shut and placing it on the table near her bed 'it's just interesting' I clear my throat, not knowing what to say to this clear psychopath.

'Thanks?' I say unsure, sending her a small smile before I climb into my bunk, wrapping the irritating cotton blanket around my body, trying to hide myself from this place, from myself. I think of my bed at home, moving on to my family, then my family's faces after the verdict was read, I push my face into the pillow not wanting to cry on the first day, I had to be strong, and showing my weak side in these places was definitely a bad thing.

'Goodnight Emily' I heard the voice from under me, covers shuffling as if she was getting settled, I didn't answer for a second because I didn't trust my voice not to come out in sobs 'Night Elizabeth' I muttered quietly, I heard her laugh gently before saying

'Call me Effy'

**

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**

'Do you have anything with you know... no meat?' I looked down at basically the slump of fat that had been placed down on to my dinner tray, the woman looked up at me as if I had two fucking heads 'are you taking the piss kid?' she said in a strong cockney accent, heads started to turn out way.

'No, but I'm a vegetarian and-'

'And I don't give a fuck, so take what you got or you'll be eating it off the floor alright?'

I began to laugh nervously; she looked me up and down in disgust before I put her out of her misery 'what, you think I'm scared of the dinner lady?' I continue to laugh and she drops the giant fork she has in her hand, the room goes silent 'say it again' she spits at me, hand fisted, banging against the table, I laugh at her again

'I said do you-'

Before I have time to complete my sentence, a hand is placed on my shoulder tugging me back gently

'Leave it Jones, she's new' I turn around to see who the hand belongs to and I'm met with the blue eyes of my roommate, or whatever you call them in jail 'Get this bitch out of my sight' the women spits at Effy, she picks up my tray for me guiding me away from the crazy dinner lady.

'You really didn't want to do that' she whispers in my ear as we walk over to a free table, eyes all still on me of course 'she's in here for life, murdered her ex boyfriend and his girlfriend, but not before setting their house on fire of course'

'What!' I shout at Effy, shocked by what she's just told me, she smirks putting her finger to her lips and pushing me down on the seat next to her 'The dinner lady?' I ask for her to confirm and she begins to laugh gently 'she's an inmate, we have chores, and you'll probably be that dinner lady soon'

I gulp loudly as Effy begins to eat my food, because why not, I'm definitely not touching that shit. 'fuck I didn't know' I say, watching her as she cuts slits through the piece of meaty lard 'everybody's looking at me' I've always been kind of self conscious but this is something else, they aren't even acting like there not looking at me, they are just doing it.

'You're new, it'll be someone else next week' Effy mutters, chewing the rubber in her mouth before her eyes connect with mine, swallowing the last of the food 'so what did you do?' she says, penetrating my eyes, and I give her the truth.

'Nothing' I simply say and her eyes widen, I'm getting prepared to explain myself, tell her how this giant fuck up happened and how I'm in here because the victim is too fucking scared to give the real attackers name in 'okay' she simply says, smiling at me before she goes back to her food.

'Just okay?' I raise my eyebrow at her and smiles 'Emily I'm not here to judge, I'm here to do my time and then piss off' I genuinely smile at her, the first smile I've meant since I've actually been in here 'so what did you do then?'

She doesn't hesitate before answering 'Spiked my boyfriends drink with a shit load of my pills hoping that the bastard would just fucking die' I choke on my words, jaw hitting the table, speechless as she continues 'well yeah, he didn't die and here I am' she says waving her hands over herself, she catches my reaction and smirks.

'don't be so shocked, this is a jail and I'm definitely not the worst in here' I agree with her, she's nice and I like her already but still, a little bit front on the whole trying to kill her boyfriend thing, she points at another girl, sitting alone at the other end of the canteen, looks like she's actually laughing at herself 'That's Pandora' she confirms, and I nod my head 'she only robbed a car' she says casually, but even in my world robbing a car is fucking hardcore 'Could of been out ages ago, but she keeps doing petty crimes to stay in here' she starts to laugh 'with her family' she quotes with her fingers, and I actually have to laugh at this too.

I continue to stare at Pandora admiring her innocence but also being in this place at the same time, Effy carries on telling me about her and it would seem that they used to be pretty close, she told me how they were old cell mates but got split up after they "accidently" set fire to the bed sheets, so they hardly see each other anymore, half way through laughing at the stories of what the two had been up to, I notice a blonde girl behind Pandora, standing in the corner observing us all, shifty as if something was about to happen.

'And what did she do?' I ask Effy, slightly pointing at the blonde, she turns her neck to catch a better look at her and then she chuckles gently 'you mean Miss Campbell?' I scrunch up my eyebrows looking at her questioningly

'Miss?'

'Yeah, she isn't an inmate, she's a trainee warden' I look back at her in disbelief

'Seriously? She can't be much older than me!' Effy smirks

'Well yeah, she's only 20 but her dad's the prison governor so she can basically do what she wants' she starts to eat my lunch again 'she doesn't want to be here, she doesn't give a shit, she's just getting her training in till she can go to some private prison somewhere' I continue to stare at her, face with a constant scowl, looking around at everyone as if she's higher in status, and then her eyes catch mine, and before she has time to look away, I do it first looking down at the table as fast as possible.

'Telling you something though Emily, it'll be years before anybody in this place will get on the friendly side of her'


	2. Chapter 2

**Thank you all for the reviews and inbox messages, they make me seriously happy :)**

**Well heres chapter two, read and review! x**

After dinner we all had to go back to our cells for a couple of hours till we were aloud out to roam around again, seriously it's like being in a fucking pre-school and I'm still not getting used to it, okay give me a break I've only just came in here yesterday but still I'm not used to being treated like I'm about to go completely crazy and kill people any second. I'd been watching Effy for a while now, picking up on certain characteristics that she'd do, to be honest as soon as we got in the cell all she did was pick up her book and continue from where she left off last night, she didn't look like the book type, especially the book that she was reading anyway 'The story of Anne frank' I couldn't think about anything more bad to read in this place, a story about a girl being locked up from everything she knows because of some big fuck up.

'I know it's a small room, but have you really got nothing better to do?' My eyes snapped up from the book cover to see Effy smirking at me, me blushing because obviously I'd been caught looking at her for no reason at all, I go to stand up, go back to the top of my bunk and try to sleep for a while but I stop, facing her as she awaits my question

'No offence but...' she raises her eyebrow when I gesture to the autobiography in her hand 'you don't look like the type to read' she closes the book in one flick again, resting it on the top of her stomach covered covers, using her elbows to push herself up 'I'm not' she confesses, lowering her eyes almost shy away from me 'but it's the last thing my mum bought me before she died' My eyes widen and seriously the only thing that's running through my head is 'good work Emily, tease the girls reading ability and dead mum' I walk towards her slowly, arms out in a friendly gesture 'I, I'm so sorry'

She looks up at me for a second before slowly a smirk appears on her lips and she bursts out laughing and I'm torn between joining in and remaining completely silent, choosing the latter obviously, I don't know how to react maybe to a person like Effy her mother's death is an amusing thing.

'You're so gullible Em, its amazing' she says catching her breath, I look at her in disbelief, 'you mean your mum isn't dead?' she starts to laugh again, pushing herself fully out of the covers this time and swinging her legs over to swing off the side of the bed, she scoffs 'I wish, she's probably in Spain now finding anyone younger than 21 to shag' she says sounding slightly pissed off.

I fidget with my hands; pushing the old raggy grey hoodie I'd been supplied tighter around me not really knowing what to say to that, so I look around the room until she speaks up again 'want to know why I really read?' I look up at her as she reaching her book again, looking from that to me so I nod gently; she pats the bed next to her so I go over sitting down.

'There is a difference between reading and writing' she states, slowly opening the book, I'm about to ask what she means until my eyes catch what's actually in the book, page 55, a perfectly pen knifed cut out rectangle holding a see-through package and hundreds of tiny white pills, I gulp loudly at the sight, Effy eyes only light up in amazement at how she's left me speechless. She picks it up from the hole in the book, cautiously looking at the door before waving the bag in front of my face.

'Drugs!' I blurt out; she starts to laugh again 'won't they find them?' she shakes her head gently, reaching behind her bed and pulling out another book, actually the exact same copy of the book she has in her hand 'when they come in and want to check the book, this is the version I'm reading' she then turns the book full of drugs over in her hands 'and when they come in and I'm counting the pills, this version will be used'

I nod at her, actually kind of surprised about how clever she is, Jesus I'm already feeling like a fucking convict, I've never taken ecstasy, I've never even fucking seen one before now. Obviously I'd been around them before with Katie and the rest of my friends taking them once in a while to get a buzz out of the experience, but I'd always been the one to stay away from shit like that, I was strictly just alcohol and even then I didn't drink that much.

'And they don't do room inspections?' I ask as she shoves the drugs back into the tiny rectangle carefully closing it, and launching it back under her mattress 'every Friday evening' she turns her head around smiling at me as she continues to hide them 'but they'll be gone by then'

'Where?' I ask looking around the room, all we have is bunk beds, two chairs, a sink, small tin toilet and a fucking shelve between us, unless she's going to do something completely American movie and hide it in the air vents. 'I'm going to trade them on for other things' she says, turning back around to me smiling 'You don't get stuff in here for free Emily, I'll exchange privileges for more privileges' I nod at her again 'like a mobile, so I can actually phone my brother in private' Phone calls right, god what I'd give right now to hear Katie's voice, to argue with her every morning about how she used the hot water, Jesus what I'd give to actually have hot water.

'You're clueless Emily' she says slightly giggling 'but don't worry, you'll be fine if you stick with me' she smiles laying a friendly hand upon my shoulder, I smile at her softly remembering a conversation I had with my dad just after I'd found out I was a suspect in the case.

'_Now listen Emzy, you're not going to jail kid, and anyone can see you haven't got a nasty bone in your body. Sometimes you never know what happens so I want to tell you something. Keep your head down love; don't get into fights, and the most important piece of advice..._

_Do not get into any kind of gang'_

We continue smiling at each other as dads words ringing in my ear, technically this isn't a gang? She knows what she's doing around here to stay safe and let's be honest I haven't got a fucking clue about how a jail works, it's fine really I could do with having someone to talk to and get advice from whose around my age anyway, my thoughts are cut short when the locking sound of the rusty key ripples through our cell, and the steel door pushes open, revealing a sweaty fat man, probably 6 foot tall clad in a officers uniform.

'Fitch, you've got a visitor' he breaths out, clearly out of breath after climbing the stairs to reach our cell. I raise my eyebrows in surprise at the man, he waves his hands when leaving the cell asking me to join him 'see you later Emily' Effy says, lying back down on her bed, hands behind head, feet crossed over each other.

**

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I burst out crying straight away, entering the almost canteen like hall and seeing my twin sister sitting, looking around in distaste at the other members of the prison, as soon as she spotted me her eyes light up, jumping up from her seat, I ran over to her enveloping her into a giant hug as we begin to sob onto each other's shoulders, being interrupted again

'Can you both sit down please' came the voice of one of the male wardens behind me

'Okay' Katie viciously spat at him over my shoulder 'twat' she muttered quietly in my ear, making me laugh before kissing my cheek gently and sitting down in the plastic seat facing me, holding each other's hands across the table, she talks first 'You've lost weight, Have you been eating?' I roll my eyes immediately at this, she still looks on concerned

'Lost weight? Katie, I've been in here for like a day and a half, I don't even think that's possible' she rolls her eyes back at me now, laughing a bit too before her face goes serious again 'But seriously Em, how are you holding up?'

I think about the question for a second, weirdly I think that things in here could have turned out worse, I could have continued mouthing off to the dinner lady, Effy might not have been there in time and I could have ended up with half my blood splatter across the canteen room tables. Even though I didn't really know anybody in here properly yet I could have ended up talking to a lot worse people.

'for being in a prison surrounded by real murderers, I'm fine' I finally say, she lets out a sigh of relief but still keeps her concerned stare into my eyes 'so no one's tried to have a go at you?' My eyes drop from hers straight away, her hand squeezing mine tighter and I look back up at her 'well yeah, but my cell mate helped me out, she's nice' I casually answer her and her eyes go wide.

'You like her?' she asks, only with a slight accusing tone this time, I look up to confirm what I'd just said 'yeah I like her, she's nice-' I catch the look in her eyes of her jumping to conclusions and correct her straight away

'Jesus Katie! No like that... she's just kind that's all' relief flashes over her face again with a smile 'thank fuck for that!' she comments, getting closer to me, eyes looking at the warden and back to me, 'so does anybody know _you know' _she whispers in my ear and I shake my head at her, she pulls her face back

'No, and nobody's going to know either' she looks at me as if I'm crazy 'Come on Katie, a prison full of girls, I'm not becoming the fucking prison bitch' she laughs nervously before I continue 'If they ask, I'll tell them, but for now I'm not walking around like a gay parade'

I catch her eye and we both burst out laughing, the prison guard looking over at us suspiciously only makes Katie laugh harder and me joining in with her, when the laughter dies down, she stares at me again 'Mum couldn't come' my eyes fall to the floor 'she's so upset Emily, I wanted her to be here but she's hardly spoken to us since the trial' I break at this point, tears start to fall down my cheeks again as I look at Katie with guilt 'god this is all my fucking fault, I'm constantly hurting her'

She squeezes my hand again, shaking her head hard at me in protest 'Non of this is your fault Emily' she ensures me but I can't do anything but try and sniff my tears away, ridden with guilt 'You where in the wrong place at the wrong time and I'm going to prove that'

'How Katie?' I instantly snap back at her 'there was no footage, she told the court that it was me that attacked her, who's going to believe us over the victim's eye witness?' she thinks for a second before answering me confidently 'listen Emily, I'm going to get you fucking justice alright? I don't care if it means finding that Jenny bitch and strangling her till she confesses she lied' she says the last bit lower whilst keeping her eyes on the prison guard 'I'm going to get you out Emily, okay?' she says, and all I can do this nod and wipe the tears away on the edge of my hoodie.

'Times up girls' Came the brass voice making me jump from behind me, I look at Katie sadly who's smiling ensuring me that everything's going to be fine, Only if I could believe it, she pulls me in for a giant hug again 'and remember, just because you're in prison doesn't mean you can turn butch okay?' she mutters into my shoulders and I can't help but laugh at her words, 'Dads coming with me tomorrow' she promises and I nod, with one last smile she's escorted by another officer out the door and I'm left with my warden 'let's go' he says, walking me into the long echoing hall till we get back into the cell bloke, before we reach the metal barred gate that allows us back into the jail his walkie talkie goes off

'We need assistants in the sector D, A fights broken out between the inmates' he hesitates for a second, looking between me and the other end of the hall, he bites his lip 'okay Fitch, wait here I'll be back in a second' I nod my head at him, as he begins to lightly jog away from me, leaving me to wait at the locked metal bar door.

Prisons are actually as grim as you would expect, white metal doors everywhere, grey plastered walls that look like they haven't been painted in years, sometimes I wonder why they don't make the prison look nice, just make the fucking experience whilst we're here bearable for us you know? But that's when I remember that there are actually some guilty people in here.

'what are you doing?' comes a harsh but feminine voice from behind me, I jump out of my skin, thinking I was the only person in here waiting until the officer came back, I turn around to be faced with fierce blue eyes looking at me suspiciously, the women from the canteen yesterday, Miss Campbell I think.

Remembering Effy's words of she doesn't give a fuck keeps in my mind, obviously I don't want to give her some long winded story for her to just roll her eyes at so I simply say 'waiting to go back in there' gesturing my eyes to the locked bars, she follows my stare to the door but the expression in her beautiful clear eyes doesn't change.

'and why are you out?' she spits at me quietly, I feel myself shrivel into my own little protection ball right in front of her, fucking hell she's dominant 'My sister came to visit me' I answer, voice barely able to listen, eyes dropping to the floor, I'm waiting for her to say something

'How old are you?' she asks, voice now gentle making my eyes look back up to hers, I'm usually confident around girls, believe me over the past couple of years I shied away but then I seemed to grow some back bone at least, but she's not just another fucking girl, she's Miss Campbell.

'18' I say, and she nods lightly, going to speak again but harsh footsteps banging against the stone floor disturb us, coming into view is the officer again, but when he see's Miss Campbell he freezes, and looks at me as if I've done something wrong 'Campbell' He greets her nodding his head in her direction but she ignores it turning to me

'I don't want to see you roaming these halls again, got it?' change from her previous tone, her eyes spitting at me, I nod at her before she pushes past us and continues her journey down the hall way, the last word in my head is definitely, Bitch.

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She's there again at dinner time, standing in the corner observing like yesterday, still looking down on the inmates as if she's some kind of superior woman, even though I find her completely spoilt at the moment I can't help but keep staring at her, It's kind of a hobbie I've picked up in here lately, because there's no television and definitely no soaps to catch up on, I've taken to observing people too, their actions, their emotions, I do it all. She's caught me looking twice now, the first time resulted in my eyes falling to the table again like yesterday, but the second time I carried her stare out, which resulted in her eyes falling to the other inmates as fast as they'd even caught onto mine.

'You should well ask her out' came the voice of Pandora, breaking me out of my trance to face her whilst she polished off the juice, my eyebrows hit the roof 'what!' I asked, she just shrugged her shoulders.

'Oh yeah, would you like to go out with me? We could spend the day in my cell looking at the shit bland walls' Karen commented laughing. Karen Mclair, Effy had introduced me to her earlier today when we all had to peel spuds together, she's a bit of a drama queen to be honest but then again that gets ruled out because she's nice, apparently when she found out the manager of her dancing group was planning on taking all there budget leaving them bankrupt she torched the place down, I came back down to earth with Effy smirking at me 'What are you guys on about?' I commented whilst once again pushing the meat around using my fork on the tray.

'only the fact that you've been gawping at her for like 20 minutes' Effy says, causing the other two girls to gently giggle, I shrug my shoulders at them defensively 'yeah, well she interests me' Effy eyebrows go higher than mine 'Yeah, I bet she does' she nudges me in the shoulder and I begin to blush

'I like her hair, the colour I mean I'm blonde but that's really bright...' Pandora Comments, Miss Campbell's hair is shoulder length peroxide blonde, natural curls draping over her shoulders, and believe me they do her justice, as Pandora carries on talking about her hair, I notice Miss Campbell call another officer over using her hands, when the women goes over to her, she leans over whispering in her ear, I wonder what it's about until the other officer turns around facing me straight away, before turning back to Campbell asking something, and the blonde replying with a head nod. Either I'm concentrating hard or I'm seriously tired, but in that second the officer turns around and I read her lips 'That's Emily Fitch' she wanted to know my name?

'and her eyes are the same colour as yours Eff, but still there's no attraction there, probably because I find boys to be mega buff and not girls' Pandora concludes her speech, Karen starts to laugh 'yeah but it doesn't matter how pretty she is' she says, readjusting her vest top 'bet no one's been in her knickers in years, the uptight cow' they all mutter an agreement, as I continue to play around with my food 'I don't know' Pandora says 'The way officer Walker flirts around her all day, I'd say they were at it'

My eyes snap over to officer walker, ah you know the type, mid thirties but still trying to remain in their youth, terrible fake tan, hair balding in the centre covered by a terrible excuse of a comb over and the worst bleached teeth I've probably ever seen. I cringe literally cringe at the fact that he thinks he could get someone like her, okay she might be a stuck up bitch by the girls around me opinion but that doesn't mean she's not absolutely fucking gorgeous .

'Emily, Emily' I look up to see Pandora and Karen making their way outside to the yard, Effy in front of me smirking 'I said are you coming outside? We get 20 minutes' I smile at her, getting up 'yeah come on' I gesture to the door; I could actually really do with some air right now.

'Wait up, Fitch' God have I told you how annoying it's actually getting being talked to when people use my second name instead? Effy and I stop seeing officer walker coming towards us, he stops in front of us but not before eyeing up both of our bodies, pervert. 'You have your councillors meeting now' I look at him confused 'councillors meeting?' I ask and he nods his head, Effy explaining.

'Every week, we have a meeting with a bullshit doctor so we can talk about our feelings' she rolls her eyes in despair 'I think they just do them to prove that they are trying to look after us' she smirks at him, he tightens his belt shooting a tired gaze over at Effy, clearing his nose he looks at me 'follow me' he turns around and begins to walk away. 'Guess I'll see you later then' I say and she smiles back at me whilst walking towards the open yard door. He leads me through the halls of the prison, round the back way were all the nursing and medical rooms are, stopping outside a white door with frosted pain of glass on, he knocks twice, opening the door and gesturing with his hands for me to go in, suddenly I'm met with the sight of a middle aged woman, ginger hair and glasses at the tips of her nose.

'Hello Emily' she smiles at me carefully as if I'm mental 'I'm Dr Evans' I nod at her, taking the seat she's offering me to sit down, she then looks over my shoulder and the door slams, making me turn around and meet the fierce blue eyes of before 'Miss Campbell will just be sitting in with us, in case there's any problems' her eyes don't leave mine as she sits in the chair by the door, this is going to be a long session.


	3. Chapter 3

**I've overwhelmed by all your amazing reviews, seriously!**

**Yes, 'Maybe it was always you' final chapter will be up soon & there will be a sequal!**

**Please review and tell me your feedback about this story, it's seriously appreciated.**

**Chapter 3, thanks for reading!**

She doesn't break the stare were currently in, the only thing that stops me is when I hear a cough turning around again and Dr Evans is smiling at me like a lunatic. 'What kind of problems?' I ask, her smile fades and her eyes drop down to the folder she has in her hands. She's trying to avoid the question of course like all good doctors do; obviously I know her answer but I just want her to fucking say it.

'So... Emily, 18' she says, taping her fingers on the edge of the folder as she continues to scan it with her eyes, I just nod hearing shuffling of clothes behind me, I seriously want to turn around and look at her again but then I'd look like the twat in this room. 'How are you settling in?' I scoff and roll my eyes at this, seriously this women is making it sound like it's a holiday camp. 'Alright' I simply answer but she seems satisfied enough with the answer, scribbling it down in the folder and moving on to her next question.

She smiles at me sympathetically now, as if she's preparing me for what she's going to ask 'do you think anything emotion led you to your crime?' I raise an eyebrow at her, she smiles elaborating 'maybe you had a crush that wasn't mutual...' she goes on and I look at her confused.

'Sorry, I think you've lost me...'

'Emily, there could be a number of reasons why you stalked your ex-boyfriend'

'What?' I shout at her straight away and she jumps in her seat 'I didn't stalk my ex-boyfriend' she smiles gently at me 'Emily it's normal to deny things but-'

'No seriously' I say gesturing to the folder in front of her with my fingers 'You must have got your files mixed up because that's not why I'm here' she's hesitant for a moment, looking between the files and me with a raised eyebrow before she stands up from her office chair and looks at Miss Campbell 'do you think...' she doesn't finish her sentence before she gets an answer from Campbell 'it's possible in this place' she says sounding bored, I turn around to see her lightly kicking her feet on the floor.

'Well excuse me for a moment Emily, there seems to be a terrible mix up' she gathers the papers off her table putting them back into my files 'I'm sure I'll find the right one and be right back' she smiles at me, I give her a simple nod only just realising that when she goes I'll be left in this room alone with the blonde sat behind me, I take a deep breath. The office door slams as the red head women leaves, casting a silent spell amongst the two of us.

'Attempted murder' comes the voice from behind me, I turn around to see a very smug blonde women smirking at me slightly, and I freeze.

'Huh?' I say and she adjusts herself so she's sitting up straight.

'Your file says you're in here for attempted murder' she answers me, still slightly smirking for some weird reason, but the only thing I can ask her is the one thought that's running through my head right now

'You read my file?' her smirk drops, and so do her eyes, before she looks back up at me with fierce blue ones once more 'No, well yes, a bit' she blushes, I can't help but smile at this, nasty women blushing for me, very cute. She must catch this because she coughs before finishing with her last sentence 'I have to, to see what psychos I'm dealing with' she fires at me, I turn my body fully now to be facing her, her eyes rake up my clothes as I look at her in disbelief 'You don't even know me' I spit at her, she laughs gently at this 'well thank god for that' she expresses every word with the roll of her tongue.

'and what's that suppose to mean?' she stands up from her chair, moving over a couple of inches till she's facing me 'nothing really, probably that you'd be a back _stabber_' she says the last word louder than the rest, and I snap, standing up and kicking the seat I sat on out the way, she steps back with shock on her face first before gaining her confident persona again

'God you're such a fucking bitch' I say and her jaw hits the floor, hands fisted into a ball 'what did you just say to me?' she says, voice mixed with shock and anger, I walk more closer to her till I'm nearly basically in her face and repeat myself 'I said you're a fucking bitch'

She sighs in anger, staring at me just as hard as and angrier than we always do 'You can't talk to me like that!' she comments and I just laugh in her face 'why, what are you going to do? Get daddy to banish me?' she's full on angry now, as am I, I must be to have the balls to actually continue 'you are so fucking spoilt, prancing around here and looking down at us as if you're someone!' before I have time to finish my speech, her nails are clawing into my arms and she tugging me out the door.

'Let go, you're hurting me!' I try pushing her off as she carries pulls me the opposite way of the cells, down a darker more unused corridor than I've ever seen in this place, I'm powerless towards her taller build in the end as she successfully get's me to the door she's looking for 'this will teach you for that mouth of yours' she comments, taking her finger nails out of my arm, probably leaving marks, opening the door and my mouth opens wide

'please no, don't leave me in here' I beg her, inside the literally 4 by 4 metre room is nothing, complete pitch black that the only light actually going into the room was when she opened the door to reveal it, she looks at me for a second then back into the room hesitating, before she tugs on my arm throwing me inside the room 'I'm sorry' I shout at her, whilst her hands are on the door and she's about to close it, before all the natural light is completely gone from my eyes I see something unusual in hers, guilt.

I bang my hands on the steel door until I can hardly feel them anymore, shouting for her, shouting for anyone to come and let me out of this room, I begin to cry half way through shouting knowing that no one else is going to hear me and that I'm fucking screwed, I must of cried myself to sleep because the next thing I know I'm waking up with my cheek slapped against the cold hard floor and voices coming from outside wherever I am, light fills the room and I remain still.

'Jesus Naomi, I can't believe you fucking did this' Comes the male voice from above me, getting closer and closer, feeling his presents near me 'Emily' he says, shaking my arms but I remain still, lightly breathing with my eyes tightly shut. 'I didn't know' comes the scared voice from the other side of the room, I know that voice, and it's fucking her.

'What you didn't know that we haven't used these rooms in over ten years, or that you actually put her in here?' He proceeds shaking my lifeless body light, muttering my first name and when this fails mutters my last name closer to my ear. When he doesn't get me to wake he sighs in frustration, feeling his body turn the other way 'It's fucking freezing in here, how long has she been in?' there's a long pause in the conversation, a lot of heavy breathing going on before she answers 'I don't know... 12 hours maybe' she mutters and even my eyes open in surprise, I've been a sleep for 12 hours? Jesus I think that's the most I've slept in my life.

'12 hours?' he repeats in a high pitched tone 'you could of fucking killed her, Jesus I can't believe this' he turns back around, still shaking me lightly, deciding to put him out of the misery that, that fucking bitch has caused I begin to stir, stretching out my legs from the protective ball my body had curved myself into 'I'm sorry okay?' she pleads him but he just scoffs 'she was talking back to me!' she argues, this just makes him scoff even louder as he smiles gently at my barely open eyes, wrapping his arms around my shoulders to help me sit up, the only thing I can see is her silhouette in the darkened rooms doors.

'Give the girl a break' he spits at her, and fucking hell he might just be my new favourite prison officer from now on. She just sighs, watching as he helps me get to my feet, I'm dazed, I feel like I've seriously been drugged or something, he asks me the routine question, If I'm alright, blah blah blah, all I can do is mutter back a small yes, wrapping my hoodie again protectively around my ice cold body as she continues to stare at me

'alright, help me get her back to her cell' he says to her as I make my way outside the room into the light, I can hardly see, shielding the light away with my hands before they finally adjust to something I haven't seen in 12 hours. She slowly reaches for my shoulder, but I flinch away from her sending her a disgusted look 'no, I don't want to be anywhere near her' she looks taken back at first, eyes widening as she looks at me, she then proceeds to fold her arms laying them across her stomach. The officer looks between me and her, before he nods his head slowly 'Go check on the other inmates Campbell, But I want to see you in my office later okay?' she hesitates before leaving, looking at me, I divert my eyes to the floor not wanting to look at her right now, she sighs in frustration then marches away from us down the hall.

By time I got back to my cell it was early hours in the morning, Effy was completely conked out on her bed with the drug book laid out across her stomach, which made me giggle a little getting a weird look off the prison officer. When he locked the door back up and I'd made sure that he definitely wasn't just going to burst back into the cell, I went over to Effy, taking the book out of her grasped fingers and fiddling under her mattress till I made sure it couldn't be seen anymore, coming back up I noticed she wasn't even in her covers and it was a freezing night. For the first time since I'd came into this place I looked at her, and I mean really looked at her, she was always so raring and ready to go that I'd never really seen her at peace and to be honest she was rather beautiful. Smiling as I brushed a piece of hair from her slumbered face, I crawled up the ladder reaching my solid mattress and wrapping the uncomfortable cotton blanket around me again, before falling asleep.

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We'd been woken up as usual at 7am, one of the wardens banging their fists against the steel of our door, I was faced with a tired looking Effy asking me questions to where I had disappeared to last night, I made some excuse telling her the councillors meeting ran longer than I expected because of the mix up in the files, which I guess was kind of half true. That's if I would have actually been around to finish the meeting and not cruelly taken away against my fucking will.

Breakfast had to be prepared by 8 and unfortunately it was mine and Karen's day to get it done, Effy had decided to volunteer and help us making the officers curious and slightly surprised to why she would want to help, she just told them that it would make her record look good which they decided to believe and walk away leaving us in the kitchen. We knew exactly why Effy wanted to help, it's because today was the day of the drug trade, for the last couple of minutes I'd been stuck in the middle of a Karen Effy argument about how they are going to get them to Sharon Jones, that's right the same Jones that I mouthed off to on the first day so straight away I definitely wasn't in her good books. Apparently in here she was some big time top dog just because of the murder of her ex boyfriend but that didn't faze me; I was taking dad's advice, keep my head down and nothing will happen.

'We could put them in her porridge?' Karen said mindlessly as she was actually scooping the porridge into the different bowls that where supplied, Effy scoffed.

'You might as well put a giant "I've got drugs" sticker on our heads' she replies back smirking, making me laugh whilst Karen sends evils my way.

'Slipping them in her jacket as she walks past?'

'Too easy'

'We could put each individual pill into the bread and-'

She stops when she sees the look Effys throwing her, fucking hell even I'm looking at her like she's just insulted my mum 'too hard' Effy says laughing, Karen just shrugs her shoulders as she continues to think of ways to pass the drugs.

'Fucking hell, just put it under her cereal or something' I joke casually whilst mixing the orange juice with water, I turn my head to look at them when I notice there not laughing and there both grinning at each other like idiots. 'Genius!' Effy exclaims, walking over to me and ruffling my hair in her hands, even though I've learned that she's only 2 months older than me she still treats me like the kid of the place, I kind of appreciate it all the same, it means that she tries to take care of me more which I'm seriously thankful of in a place like this.

I look at them raised eyebrow 'seriously cereal?' Effy nods her head rapidly at me whilst walking back over to Karen 'it's perfect really' she says, playing out with her fingers 'No liquid damage to the drugs, and who's going to want to check cereal?' she smiles and I nod head slowly, turning back to what I'm doing when through the open space in the canteen wall Pandora catches my eye, sitting alone in the area looking seriously sad, she's usually such a happy person in here it's kind of unbelievable, hell she cheers me up a lot anyway.

'Can you guys finish this?' I keep my sight on Pandora, I hear a muffled sure whilst there still in there drug discussion, I make my way out of the kitchen and towards her, taking the plastic seat in front of her. She looks up, sending me a small smile 'Hey Em' she says, diverting her eyes back to her hands on the table.

'You alright panda?' I ask concerned, she blows a deep breath, making the ends of her hair fly up in the process 'Yeah I'm fab' she replies forcing a smile at me, I lift my eyebrow at her asking what the real problem is.

'Fine, mum came to visit today, saying she wants us to get back to the way we were, but I love the people I've met in this place, plus mum always said the world wasn't built for a girl like me' she takes a breath as I continue to listen 'I get released again in a few weeks and I just don't know what to do, everything is flipping buggered in my head!' she concludes slamming her fists against the table

'I wish I was being released in a couple of weeks' I say sadly, she looks up with sympathy in her eyes 'Panda, why don't you just leave and enjoy yourself? This isn't no way to live your life' I say, waving my hands around the prisons canteen were currently in, a faint smile covers her face

'but this is the only place I've ever felt normal' My heart breaks right there looking at this broken down girl in front of me, she's only ever felt normal being locked up? Well that is kind of sad for her.

'well,' I say smiling at her cheerfully 'You've still got a couple of weeks yet so you should enjoy it while you can' I say and it's like the most fucked up thing I've ever said whilst being here because enjoying prison? Impossible.

Her small smile turns into a grin now, it turns even bigger when she looks behind me straight into the canteen 'Sorry Em, there serving my favourite type of Jelly and it's usually gone by time I'm down here, I'll be back now' I start to laugh when she jumps up straight off the seat and over to Karen who's serving out the food, I also catch Effy's eye, she's carrying a tray, bowl full of cereal no doubt over to Jones, she winks at me which causes me to laugh even more, I feel the table lower with someone's weight on it and I turn around to greet Pandora again

'You were fast' I say smiling, but I'm met with the wrong blue eyes, Ice old blue eyes for that matter of fact, I look down avoiding her but she clears her throat 'Listen, I just wanted-'

'What have you got in your hands?' Mine and the blondes head snap to Officer Walker, running towards a group of women, more precisely Sharon Jones, My stomach drops for a second, eyes scanning around the room to find Effy, when I finally meet her she's smirking at the scene from the corner of the room

'I haven't fucking got anything!' Jones shouts back to him with her thick cockney accent, clearly stuffing the package into her overall pockets, as she wipes her hands free from her breakfast and picks her tray up walking to the kitchen

'Don't you walk away' he shouts after her, but she ignores him proceeding to walk and he follows, she's going to be caught with the drugs, that much is obvious from what I'm seeing at the moment, but fuck, what if she snitches Effy up? I'm too engrossed in this scene that I barely notice the light tap that is constantly hitting my shoulder, when I turn around we have one of them intense staring moments again until she breaks out silence 'listen can we get out of here?' I raise my eyebrow at her and she rolls her eyes 'It's a bit loud and I want to talk to you' she concludes, I nod gently, lifting myself from the plastic seats and following her past the steel gates and into one of the nearby corridors.

We stop, middle of the corridor and she looks anywhere but me and I can't help but scoff inside at this scene of her actually having nothing to say to me, I raise my shoulders at her 'I thought you wanted to talk?' she seems shocked by me voicing up first, hiding her eyes with her glowing blonde locks she turns back to me 'Yes I did, Listen...'

I look at her expectant

'What I did was wrong, as my duty as a prison warden I shouldn't have-'I start laughing and she stops her speech to look at me in disbelief.

'Who wrote that script down for you, Governor Campbell? That's pathetic' I conclude, laughing at the fact that she doesn't probably want to apologise, she's probably been forced to say this shit to me just so she doesn't get in trouble with her job, she straightens up her shoulders at me

'Listen Fitch, I don't know you so don't fucking act like you know me either okay?' she spits at me, and I just continue to look at her unfazed because I'm seen her lash out plenty of times before. 'Are you even allowed to swear at me _Officer' _I say smiling smugly at her and she begins to bitterly laugh

'Allowed? You're not on the playground anymore _Inmate_' she shouts right back, sick of taking this shit off her, I role my eyes giving her a tired look, turn around and walk straight back out the way I entered this place, probably find Karen and Eff in the canteen 'Em'

I freeze, she didn't call me Fitch, she didn't even call me Emily, but she called me Em. I don't know why this is a big deal to me but it is, I can feel my heart racing almost ten times faster from her saying it and I can't even explain why it's happening, I turn around slowly to see her nervously looking at me

'I just don't want you to be scared of me okay?' Insecure and self conscious, who would of thought? Why wouldn't she want me to be scared of her? She looks like the type that would want every fucker in here to be shitting a brick when they see her.

'Why?' I say, voice breaking a little and she shrugs her shoulder

'I – I just-' I put her out of her misery

'I'm not scared of you' I state and she stops rambling to look at me 'Before you rudely interrupted before' she continues, slight smirk appearing on her face 'I was about to say, I reacted that way because no one's ever spoken to me like that before' well obviously not if she always treats people the way she treated me.

'Well I won't be doing it again' I state, there's a silence where she giggles lightly and I'm completely stunned, I think it's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard, or I've been locked up for a while with beast looking women and appreciate anything even half groomed, because I don't like her _like her_ how could I she's been a total bitch from day one.

I don't, Oh Jesus.


	4. Chapter 4

**I can't stop writing this... ahahah but anyway I hope you're all still enjoying it!**

**thanks for reading and your lovely reviews, it inspires me to write like mad. x**

'I can't believe that' Effy's so pumped right now it's actually scary 'if he walked into the canteen two minutes earlier that would of been me caught' she says, rubbing her hands together in excitement whilst we walk back to our cell, I've learned a couple of things from my time with Effy, but the main one being that nothing gets more adrenaline pumping around her body than doing things she shouldn't be doing, it's just a added bonus by nearly getting caught. 'And did you see her face? Jesus I've never wanted to laugh so hard in my life' I don't even have to ask who she's talking about because I witnessed it all when me and Miss Campbell where disturbed by walker when asking for assistants, Sharon Jones pushing at least 4 officers off her using all her might then throwing most of the canteen utensils at them, after one of the officers managed to get her on the floor handcuffing her, the drugs where easily found slipping out of her overalls, the little plastic bag broken from all the confrontation to get them.

'She looked pissed, what if she tells them about the deal?' I ask a little worried, entering the cell and sitting down on one of the chairs; she launches herself onto the bed laughing a little 'Emily this is prison, if people know what's good for them then they won't snitch' she says, my eyes widen, I never really took Effy for the violent type really, she's kind of has a normal built for a girl our age, face definitely too pretty to be getting into fights with and crystal blue eyes that don't look like they could cause anybody harm. She must notice how uncomfortable I've become because suddenly her laughter dies down and her voice becomes more serious

'It's going to be fine okay? Don't worry so much Em' she says, softly smiling at me and I can't help but return it straight away, nodding my head at her slowly. It goes silent then, the only noise in the room is her pulling the loose covers around her body and my light breathing, she sits up in her sheets staring at me 'what did Campbell want with you anyway?' the silence fills the room again when I don't answer, almost suffocating, her question rings in the air unanswered, as I walk over to the desk, pretending to arrange around the letters I've received from friends, 'she wanted to apologise' I mumble quietly.

'She what?' Effy asks, finding a comfortable sitting position on her bed, I turn around to face her 'she wanted to apologise for being a bitch to me' I confirm and her face scrunches up confused 'first of all, when have you ever even spoken to her? And second, she apologised?' she raises her eyebrows at me completely lost; I take a deep breath taking a seat at the bottom of her bed.

'She was in my councillors meeting; things got heated between us and...' I don't really want to finish the last bit, I know how protective of her friends she is in here and I can guarantee that she will go off on one if she knows what actually happened between us to, she nods her head telling me to go on 'she just said some things that really got to me' she goes to talk but I raise my finger at her 'and then today she came over to apologise, that's all' I finish casually, this only makes her more confused even after I've explained it

'But she never apologises to anyone...' I'm more intrigued by the second as she continues to talk 'you don't think she's ever said anything to me? Only a couple of weeks before you came in here we came to blows' I sit closer to her, as she proceeds to speak 'yeah the stupid bitch tried to tell me that the way I dress wasn't appropriate for "her" prison' she scoffs at this, but I can't help laughing because believe me, half the clothes I've seen Effy in aren't appropriate for anything, but at least she's got clothes, apparently my suitcase hasn't been cleared yet.

'You must be the chosen one then' she says, smirking at me but not before it grows into a shit eating grin 'or maybe she fancies you' I blush like hell, throwing a pillow at her 'Fuck off' I say laughing, she joins in too casually laying back onto her mattress yawning 'nah, last thing I heard she had a boyfriend' I'm glad she's not looking right now because the blush and smile have wiped right off my face, unknown jealously filling my veins. Light snores come from her, concluding she fell a sleep but then her voice fills the room again 'Actually, I think they broke up, well that's what I overheard Gov Campbell telling walker' my jealousy subsides as the room goes still again, and once more I'm having an internal battle with myself, why did that affect me so much? I don't care if she's got a boyfriend, why the fuck would I care, god.

'Eff?' I ask quietly, she hums in reply obviously getting ready to drop off any seconds 'Do you sometimes feel like...' I realise I'm just being stupid and cut my sentence off 'forget it, it's stupid' I say, walking back over to the desk, fiddling with my mail once more, I hear her rise from the covers 'no, feel like what?' she says, wiping at her sleepy eyes, I feel kind of bad for not leaving her to rest, after breakfast we're all allowed to do whatever we want but today Effy has her councillors session leaving no time to sleep. I face her, feeling kind of insecure

'I don't know, it's just today when I was talking to miss' I take a deep breath, watching her eyes for any reaction 'I felt like I couldn't breathe' she doesn't answer or move for a while, so I sit nervously waiting her reaction, hoping that something comes sometime soon, suddenly her voice fills the cell 'so what you're trying to say is that you want to shag her?'

Straight away I protest, voice coming out in a squeak 'what? No, no!' she turns around, seriously full on grin occupying her mouth, my hands nervously placed on my lap, eyes not quite reaching hers to the fullest 'you have a crush on Naomi then?' I don't answer straight away, Naomi being the foreign word in this sentence but then it snaps, memory coming back of when the light poured into that terrible room I had been placed in _Jesus Naomi, I can't believe you fucking did this. _Naomi Campbell, sexy, No fuck off.

I stand up from the seat in a flash, waving my hands everywhere 'No, I don't! What even makes you think that-'

'Seriously Emily, Don't even finish that sentence okay? Boys, girls, pensioners whatever, you're still Emily' I can't help the instant smile that comes across my face, Jesus she is really fucking lovely.

'I slept with a girl once' My eyes brows hit the roof again in a second, she looks deep in thought 'actually it was kind of nice for a change'

I laugh, 'is this the part where you tell me you're lonely, so we fuck up again the cell walls?'

She bursts out laughing at this, no actually snorting which causes me to go along with her 'yeah, you wish Fitch!' she says through laughs, devilish smile growing on her face 'actually I know who you wish you were doing on a cell wall'

'Shut up!' I say, a hand covering my ears as the room drowns with even more laughter.

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'I found the bitch!' Katie's first words when she and dad come into the prison halls to visit me again, not Hello Emily, Not how're you? And not even a fucking hug, well a part from dad who's hugging me for dear life, its nice feeling protected in his arms again. 'Miss you kid' he mumbles into my hair, making my hold on him ten times stronger than before, when we're seated smiling at each other like Idiots, I look over to Katie.

'Who did you find?' she rolls her eyes at me stupidly 'Jenny Emily, I fucking found Jenny!' My eyes pop out of my head, heart beat speeding and hitting against my rib cage 'seriously?' my voice comes out wavy and she nods her head viciously 'Turns out there's not that many teenage Jenny's involved in knife attacks in Bristol' she says smirking at me and My face grows into a giant grin until dad interrupts the conversation 'now Katie, don't be getting your sisters hopes up' he says gently, making me frown slightly at Katie 'well what did she say?' I ask and her eyes turn down to the desk, hands playing together

'Just that it was definitely you that attacked her and you made the other girl up' awkward silence fills the table as my hands come down frustrated bashing them against the plastic 'I wish I would of left her to die' I say, making myself feel slightly guilty because even deep down in my heart I'm proud that I had the courage to save a girl's life like that. 'You don't mean that Em' Dad says, placing his thumb on my cheek to try to get him to move my eyesight to his 'I'm proud of what my little girl did, even if these bastards can't see that' he spits at the male security guard across the room, getting looks from everybody around the place.

'Dad can't you talk to the police, I was nervous at the trial maybe that they saw this and held it against me-' he's looking at me sympathetically as I beg him to do anything he can to get me out of here, he grasps my hands tight 'Emzy, the case is closed love' light tears fills my eyes, 'but I won't stop until you're at home with your family where you belong' he says forcefully making me smile at how hard he's working.

'yeah Em, and don't think just because that bitch is telling fucking lies that I'm not going to fucking harass her till I can't breathe anymore' Katie follows with, making my right hand automatically grasp hers. 'anyway girls, I'm getting a tea, want anything?' he aims this at me mainly, shaking my head lightly at him as he makes his way over to the vending machines.

'Not to alarm you Emily, but there's been a girl staring at the back of your head since we've been in here' I look at her confused, before turning around to be met with the sight of Effy, smiling and laughing a long to whatever her visitor has got to say, male, short sandy hair, she smiles at me, I wave my hand inviting her over, wanting her to meet my sister 'Emily, what the fuck are you doing' I shush her with a hand, watching Effy grasp the lads arm lightly excusing herself before making her way over to us smiling.

'Katie this is my cell mate Effy, and Effy this is obviously my sister Katie' I say, introducing them, they greet each other with head nods before my sight falls back onto the boy she was with 'who's your friend Eff?' I say teasing her and she giggles 'not friend, boyfriend' she corrects me, I look at her confused

'You mean the boyfriend you tried to-'

'Different boyfriend' she corrects me again before I can even finish 'Cooks nicer than the last prick' she concludes smiling and then I realise that I've completely stopped talking to Katie, I'm about to apologise before Katie starts to speak 'why don't you take a seat' she says to Effy, and I'm actually quite surprised, she gestures to the seat to the side of me which Effy gladly takes, Katie leans in, elbows on the table

'Listen yeah, I know you're like the tough bird being in jail and shit, but if you get my little sister into any shit whilst being in here I won't think twice about ripping your tits off okay?' I'm about to ask what the fuck she's doing but then Effy begins to laugh sitting next to me, I'm waiting for a serious bitch fight to start but Effy reaches forward gently putting her hands on Katie's arm, successfully making her flinch 'Listen Katie, I'm looking out for Emily okay? Not looking for shit but making sure she stays away from shit' Katie looks at her for a second, like truly analysing her before taking a deep breath.

'Well I guess me and you are going to get on perfectly' she smiles, 'oh and by the way, you're like seriously pretty for someone who's banged up for probably being a murderer or something' Typical Katie.

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There is one thing good about this prison, one tiny little thing that made me smile from the moment Karen shown me it, and that was the library of course and fucking hell for a prison full of convicts it wasn't half full of some of my favourite classics. I'd been in and out of there for a couple of days now, taking books to and from my cell, If I wasn't spending time with the rest of the girls in the canteen or with Effy in my cell I'd been in the library.

I was making my way back down to the library when the book fell out of my hands making a loud clasping noise in the empty halls, before I had time to retrieve it there was another hand picking it up away from me, god I hope it was her, slowly lifting my head I'm met with her smiling face, automatically making me smile straight away 'You read this?' she says, fingers smoothing over the cover of Hamlet I was about to return, gazing down at the book and then into my eyes

'Of course' I say, gesturing to the book '14 times, it's my favourite' I chuckle lightly, she smiles down at the cover before looking up at me with so much seriousness I nearly have to look away 'Mine too' she states and suddenly my light chuckle isn't there anymore, and I can't take my eyes off her, and it's definitely getting to much for me.

I quickly glance at her, noticing she's out of her black skirt and white shirt uniform and dressed more casual in a off the shoulder grey oversized shirt and black tights, licking my lips would be my first response but I'm sure she knows I'm fucking perving at her right now.

I cough 'so are you off home?' I smile at her, which she returns easily before giving my book back, she doesn't answer straight away looking down and then back up to me as if she's deciding her answer. 'Hmm not really' she clears her throat 'I've got a date'

'Oh,' is all I can say, the familiar feeling of this morning in my cell haunts me again, body full of jealously as she continues to stare down at me, her eyes making me melt into a thousand pieces yet I'm still so fucking angry I want to rip this book right up in my hands 'Naomi, I'll be ready now I'm just signing off' comes the voice of officer walker, poking his head out of the main office and sending a wink Naomi's way, making me cringe in pure sickness right in front of her, I fucking knew the rumour had to be true. He disappears back into the office and I turn to her in disbelief.

'Officer Walker? Your dates with officer walker?' she shrugs her shoulders, eyes focusing on the book that I'm twirling between my fingers nervously 'Yeah, Don's a nice guy' I burst out laughing bitterly that her eyes snap up to mine in a instant, that famous Campbell scowl appearing back onto her face. 'Don? What kind of name is Don?' I mock and she rolls her eyes at me as if I'm a disobedient child. 'Why does this bother you so much? I instantly scoff at this.

'It doesn't bother me, I just think you could do better than him, fuck it anyone could do better than him' I state, and she rolls her eyes again 'well it's my private life so I don't think this has got anything to do with you' she spits, and I freeze. Pushing past her I continue my journey down to the library 'Enjoy your date' I shout over my shoulder, hearing her grunt in frustration as I enter the library doors, slamming it behind me and collapsing onto it taking a deep breath.

Pushing myself off the door I make my way to the back of the empty dull room, finding where to put my book back 'fucking stupid crush, stupid gorgeous bitch, stupid fucking pervert walker' I mutter under my breath as I take my anger out pushing most of the books off the shelve as I through Hamlet back into the pile of Shakespeare classics. Turning around I bump into something, or rather someone solid or more to you known as Sharon Jones, smiling down at me with her tobacco stained yellow teeth and terrible red skin 'Oh sorry, didn't see you there' I chuckle nervously as she continues to smile.

'Like reading hey?' she says, pointing her eyes towards the hundreds of books across the room, I swallow hard nodding my head at her 'Passes time' I comment, manuvering my body past her and walking to the main centre of the room 'didn't know you came in here' I say smoothing my hand across the dusty tables whilst walking past to a different pile of books, she follows me of course.

'I don't, I'm here to see you actually' I turn around looking at her confused, her grin doubles 'I want my pills' I shake my head at her slowly 'why are you asking me? I don't do the drugs' I say holding my hands in the air in defence, she just laughs at me.

'there seems to be a lot of things you don't do Fitch' she spits at me, 'Don't think I've forgotten miss no meat, I'm a vegetarian' fuck I knew my first day was going to come back and kick me right into the ass, she gets closer now, making me subconsciously move away from her walking backwards until my back hits a shelf 'now get me my fucking pills now!' she shouts at me and I freeze, stuttering a lot of random shit until I find the right words 'listen I haven't got any okay? But I'll go back to my cell and ask Effy for you' I say shivering in fear, that's when I hear the lock on the library door go, standing there is one of Jones gang, three other girls come out of the different isles of the library, my legs nearly collapse.

'You're not going anywhere princess' she laughs, making the rest of the girls laugh with her, I open my mouth ready to shout anything, not really deciding on what to go on but maybe someone would hear me and come in 'and don't you dare shout, or me kicking the shit out of you will be the last of your problems'

Before I even have time to quiver in fear, her fist is in the air, smacking again my nose and in one straight punch I hear the crack in my face, feel the hot liquids running down over my lips, knowing that my nose is definitely broken whilst falling to the floor 'I never liked you from day one' One of the girls shouts down at me, as the feeling of the hard front heel of their shoes begin to rain pain down onto my torso and ribs.

And the last thing I remember before my body stops feeling pain and my eyes turn to black?

Maybe I should have left her to die.


	5. Chapter 5

**Hey! I've written this chapter like 38393 times. originally Emily was going to be seriously hurt but then it didnt really fit in with it always being in her POV.**

**anyway, I don't know, tell me if you like it, if it was shit ahaha**

**thanks for reading and reviewing x**

Once she punched me and I fell to the floor they continues to punish my torso with vicious kicks for a couple of minutes until she suddenly stopped, I felt a pair of hands grab at my cotton hoody forcing me to stand up in front of them, she pushes me back till my back hits against the shelves successfully knocking most of the books onto the floor with dust flying everywhere.

'check her girls' she says to the three women currently watching her in amazement as if she's brilliant for being some fat waster who enjoys to put misery into people's lives, they walk in front of me, one padding down my upper body whilst the other does my legs, checking my pockets in and out with frustration. They turn back around to Jones frightened looks on their faces 'she's clean Sharon' her smug face drops, eyeing me suspiciously 'no, she must have the drugs' she states, pushing them out the way grabbing my hoody again routing through the pockets.

'Where have you fucking put them Fitch?' she shouts in my face, I cringe as her hot breath brushes up against my cheek 'I've never had them' I say quietly, she starts to laugh bitterly before her hand comes down hard around my neck, pushing me more again into the shelf 'stonem said you had them on you' my entire body freezes. She's lying Effy wouldn't have told her that, she fucking wouldn't have told her that there's just no way.

'She told us you'd be in here today and that you'd know where they are' unless Naomi directed Sharon Jones in here and told her to beat the shit out of me then she must be telling the truth. The only person who knows about my nightly visits to the library is fucking Effy, she'd always ask where I was going if I was leaving the cell only tonight she seemed more jumpy in asking where I was going, I thought it was a protective thing but she was playing me, she lied to me, she's lied to my fucking sister.

'The pills are inside her fucking book' I spit at Sharon, pushing her hand away from my neck and stumbling to find a chair before my legs give in with nerves completely, a smile grows out on her face laughing gently before she comes over to me, rubbing my hair in her hands 'Can't trust anyone in here can you Fitch?' I scoff at this because for once in this place I fucking agree with her, she waves her hands to the girls gesturing them to follow her 'Just because stonem takes you under her wing don't think you can fucking trust her' with this she walks away laughing, using the back entrance instead of the one she locked before.

I feel sick, she used me for her dirty little drug games, I can't fucking trust anybody in here anymore, the main door handle comes down with banging on the door, I don't move, continue facing back to it as I rest on the chair, I hear the lock being turned from the outside then a voice I can't bear to hear right now 'Emily?' I hear her sigh 'why the fuck was the door locked?' she asks, moving closer to me but I still don't answer her, continuing to sit still, it's then when she must noticed the smashed through shelf 'and what the fuck have you done to the library?' she shouts and I snap standing up and turning around 'I haven't done fuck all to your precious little library Naomi alright?'

I push past her heading for the now unlocked door until she catches my wrists with her hands, if I wasn't so upset and angry right now I'd probably be swooning that she's touching me 'Emily, what the fuck happened to your nose?' being in the moment I completely forget the red liquid that is currently pooling underneath my nostrils, I subconsciously stroke my fingers underneath, before wiping the blood with the sleeve of my hoody

'Nothing' I stutter mumbling my words 'I just get nose bleeds, that's all' she looks at me, surprisingly slightly shocked and unconvinced. 'Oh and I suppose you randomly just get bruises across your face too right?' she challenges me, I scoff rolling my eyes, 'can't you just leave it'

'No, who fucking did this?' I tug my hands out of her wrists, refusing to answer because it would probably just lead to more violence on my behalf. 'I'm going back to my cell' I say looking deeply into her eyes and she sighs.

'Emily' she says whilst I walk away, out the library doors and back on the familiar corridor.

'Fitch you better fucking stop, or I'll drag your ass back down to the room' for something that's meant to sound like the worst thing in the world I can't help stopping as the giant smirk grows on my face from Naomi talking to me like Miss Campbell again. She comes up behind me, hand on my shoulder making me turn around revealing a small smile plastered across her face too 'listen you don't have to tell me alright? Just let me clean you up' I raise my eyebrow at these words, she blushes stuttering out more words with a cough 'I mean, let me help you clean yourself' she says again, shutting her eyes at how even more shit those words sounded as well, I begin to laugh

'Listen whatever you want to do, can you just decide because I think I'm internally bleeding' I remove my hand away from pinching my nose, newly red stream of blood pouring down caught by my other hand, her eyes widen as nods her head vigously 'fuck, yeah' she says, nodding her head towards the door

**

* * *

**

She led me up the staffs only stairs, clearly stating that under no circumstances must inmates pass the door, but she didn't even look twice at the sign which kind of made me smile inside, In all honestly she's a pretty terrible prison warden, even if she is only training here but at least she isn't treating me like a murderer.

It gets pretty awkward then, both of us in a small staff toilet whilst I dab toilet roll against my blood clotting nose, especially since she's watching my every move, I catch her eyes in the mirror but instead of looking away embarrassed straight away I decide to start a conversation 'thanks, for you know helping... you could of just left me really' most people would I add on the end in my mind. She suddenly start bursting out laughing, changing from the reflection in the mirror I turn looking at her confused

'come here' she says, grabbing the toilet paper out of my hand, fingers under my chin pulling it towards her before she starts to wipe the blood away, she's so close I can actually feel her breath on my lips. 'If you don't tilt your head back' she whispers, still looking into my eyes whilst tilting it back 'it's going to go everywhere' she finishes smiling shyly at me, as I nod my head gently, she swallows still fixing my situation 'and I couldn't of just left you because it's my job to protect you' she tilts my head back down now 'and you're sometimes alright to talk to' she jokes sarcastically 'all done' she whispers, taking her fingers away from my chin, fuck this means I'll have to go back to my cell now.

'Although, officer walker is probably a bit pissed off that my ten minutes turned into not showing up' she quirks her lip at me, I'm confused raising my eyebrows at her before I actually catch on 'shit, shit you better go' I say opening the door for her, only to have her reach above me and close it shut again 'I'm sure he can wait' and I'm hoping that he can wait a long time because I don't want her to leave at all.

'Listen I'm sorry about before you know, I'm sure he's alright once you get to know him' she raises her eyebrow at me unconvinced of what I'm saying, I'm preparing for her to go completely ice cold on me again when what she says next surprises me 'Emily, he's a greasy middle aged pervert with a Toupée' My jaw hit's the cold bathroom floor in shock

'what happened to "Don's a nice guy"' I quote using my fingers and she starts to giggle gently whilst throwing the rolled up toilet paper down the toilet, flushing it 'he was in the next room, I couldn't just call him a greasy pervert while he was listening'

'Then I don't get why you were going out with him' her smile drops now, washing her hands from the little stains of blood and doing it slowly as possible, that's when I realised I'd over stepped the inmate and prison officer barriers we'd seemed to forgotten about in the last half hour, I'm about to step up and tell her it's none of my business when a cold loud knock bursts through the small bathroom.

'Who's in there?' deep male voice

Like a shot Naomi's turning the tab off and frantically wiping her hands down her tights, 'fuck, fuck' she says looking at me weird, before looking around the room as if she's looking for a secret escape, to be honest she seems frightened right now

'Naomi what's wrong?' The knock get's louder on the door and she puts her fingers to my lips 'Miss Campbell, and don't talk so loud' she says, not in anger but nervousness, she then proceeds to search through her bag, and all I can do is stand here in amazement before she pulls out what she needs, grabbing my wrists she puts the mental rings around them frantically locking the hand cuffs 'what are you doing?' I whisper frustrated at her but she gives me that look, the one right before I called her a fucking bitch the other day, and who carries these in there bag anyway

'Open this door now!' Comes the stern voice, Naomi almost prepares herself before opening it revealing a man in a charcoal black suit, officer badges covers most of his collar and bright grey hair, he looks at me with distaste before his eyes snap sternly to Naomi's

'Dad sorry, Fitch was attacked and-' dad, fuck me the infamous governor Campbell, she's terrified of him, and so am I when he cuts her off 'and there's toilets that are specifically for the inmates, you know better than this Campbell' he spits at her and I feel her freeze next to me

'Why don't you take your _chum _back to her cell, then I want to talk to you okay?' with one last look between the both of us he turns his nose up and walks away.

Walking back to my cell is let's just say more awkward then being trapped in a cubical with her, all her conversation has gone and it's replaced with silence and the clap of my pumps against the stone floor, 'so that was your dad?' I ask as we're walking, she just nods seemingly in her own world, I don't push it then because here comes ice cold bitch again, she stops outside my cell 'you know the drill, breakfasts at 7, lights out at 10' I nod my head at her, 'are you okay Naomi?'

'Miss Campbell' she snaps at me, opening the cell with her key and taking me inside, sat on the bed reading her fucking drug book is effy, shit eating grin as she stares between me and Naomi, before I have time to turn around the steel door is bolted shut and Naomi's gone and now I'm left with Effy

'she had you in handcuffs hey, didn't know she was in to that type of thing' she comments whilst laughing, putting her book down and walking more over to me, she scrunches her face up in confusion 'what the fuck happened to your nose?' she says sounding almost concerned which makes me scoff, taking a look in the slate mirror on the wall my nose is probably swallow 2 times bigger than the usual size, her concern turns into another smirk when I don't answer 'she likes it rough too?'

'Oh you're so funny, what Christmas cracker did you pull these from?' I throw at her, rolling my eyes and climbing to the top of my bunk, straight under the covers, she climbs up too, leaning over me slowly 'what's wrong with you today?' I don't answer, disappearing under the covers and she lets out a sigh

'Well I did tell you she had a boyfriend' she says, getting down off the bunk and I sit up, covers falling off me straight away 'this isn't about her!' I shout at her and she nods smiling, but fuck her 'I had a nice visit from Sharon Jones today' her face snaps towards mine confused expression

I lift my vest top up, small blue bruises spreading up my ribs, and around my back, she gasps 'yeah, her and her mates had a great time kicking me on the library floor' I say bitterly, jumping up from the bunk, down the ladder pacing the room 'but do you know what the best bit was?' she swallows, shaking her head slowly at me 'when you told her that I had the drugs on me' I spit at her and she shakes her head, waving her hands frantically at me

'Emily, she's twisting it, it wasn't fucking like that at all!' I refuse to hear her side of the story, already hearing enough shit for one day 'You told her where I was, you fucking basically planned the whole attack out with her' now she seems pissed

'You're making it seem like I'm on her side'

'Well aren't you?' I shout at her and she laughs

'No!' she walks towards me 'listen okay, she wanted the drugs and I didn't have the new ones yet, so yes I did tell her you had them to buy me some time' I go to talk and she stops me 'No listen Emily, it wasn't to hurt you, for what I knew she was still in lock up for having drugs on her, so she wouldn't see you till tomorrow, and that's when I'd get the drugs and give them to her before she saw you' she finishes and I look at her amazed 'so the drugs come tomorrow?' I ask calmly and she smiles

'yes' I slowly walk towards her bed and she follows me with her eyes, quickly pulling her mattress away and grabbing her book, her eyes go wide, and what do you know, inside a packet of perfectly good ecstasy pills, I throw the book at her in anger, she looks down in guilt.

'Everybody is right about these places' I state, looking for her eyes to catch mine 'it's full of psychotic bitches who couldn't cut it in the real world, you're just a fucking user Effy' I climb back up my bunk 'well have fun using someone else from now on'

'Emily, I want to protect you'

'I can protect myself, just fuck off' she doesn't respond, the bed moves from her climbing into her bunk, and before I know it I'm drifting off to sleep worrying about how I'm going to protect myself from now on.

**

* * *

**'Emily'

My bed rocks from side to side, blanket pulled off me and random bright light shining into my eyes, 'Emily, wake up' I open my eyes lightly to see the beautiful blue eyes of the blonde I'm infatuated with staring straight back at me.

'Naomi?'

'Yes,' she says, making the sign for me to talk quieter I oblige 'what are you doing in here?' I whisper and she shrugs her shoulders 'I'm on the night shift tonight' she says smiling at me, I just nod at her 'I want to show you something' she says shyly, I sit up stretching out my limbs

'What time is it?' I say yawning; she shines the torch at her gold watch '3:30'

My eyes bulge out of my head, she giggles lightly, nervous looking down at Effy scared in case she wakes her.

'Grab a jacket' she whispers as I slowly climb down the bunk ladder 'its cold out tonight'


	6. Chapter 6

**Hi, My other stories last chapter 'maybe it was always you' should be up sometime this week, it's kind of hard to write being the last chapter, it's like wrapping the whole story!**

**anyway, the reviews on this have been seriously great and I'm glad you're all enjoying it, chapter 6!**

She stood with her shoulder leaning against the cell door, looking out into the hall probably making sure that no one else was around, I didn't know what she wanted with me at this hour but that didn't stop the excitement of knowing that she knows she could get punished for unlocking my cell in the middle of the night but she's doing it anyway. I didn't know what to think about being woken up with her in my vision, all I know is that I was going to follow in whatever she wanted to do. Sitting straight up in my bed scanning my eyes around the room to find the jacket that was clumsily thrown at the bottom of my bed, reaching my arms through it then and zipping it up to my chin, I caught her smiling from the corner of my eyes but that soon changed when I shifted myself down the bunk and onto my feet.

I walked towards her, still rubbing my eyes to try and get rid of the tired haze that was casting over my vision, but not before hitting my toe on the corner of the steel bar poles of the bunk 'oh my fucking toe' I hop up and down bending over to cradle it between my hands and she rushes over faster than light, 'Emily, don't you might wake her up' she gestures with her eyes to Effy, 'It fucking hurts' I say a little too loudly, she places her hand over my mouth muffling my painful words and she starts to laugh gently as I look on in bewilderment. My words die in my throat as I feel the skin of her hand gently covering my lips, fucking hell the weird thing right now is that I actually might want to lick her fucking hand. 'Tough girl can handle jail but not a little toe stub' she whispers gently, hand still covering my mouth, eyes scanning my face as she continues to chuckle silently. She removes her hand and I remain silent as her hand trickles down my arm gently, leaving me speechless when her hand suddenly locks with mine, I visibly flinch which she notices straight away.

'Sorry, it's just... I haven't brought any handcuffs with me and it's kind of a policy in the halls' she starts, nervously informing me more in-depth of the policy of always being cuffed on the cell sector but I remain silent, eyes still locked down at her hand currently holding mine in it, 'can't trust you not to run away from me' she concludes with a tense laugh, still no words to add to it, I bring my eyes up to hers, unreadable expression until she releases my hand, looking around the room with her eyes 'actually it's fine, every where's locked and-'

'No,' I say, taking a deep breath, grasping her hand in mine again, loving the fucking feeling of grasping her hand in mine without any permission at all 'you can't trust me to not run away' I confirm, she lightly nods her head stirring down at my lips as I continue to talk 'You can't break policy' I say, head down looking up at her shyly through my eye lashes while there is silence between us, kindly broken by Effy snorting and rolling over in her bunk, Naomi coughs

'well, come on then' she smiles, dragging me out the cell, leaning against the cold hard grey walls, hands still connected as she locks the cell from the outside with her key. Smiling when she's done as we strolls hand in hand down the windy prison halls, silence rained upon us, how romantic. I'm too deep in the fact that I'm feeling strangely connected to Naomi even though just a couple of hours ago she was having a go at me for using her first name, 'where are we going?' I break the talking drought; she doesn't seem surprised by my question. Shrugging casually, 'not far' she says, turning her head and smiling at me, she doesn't think I catch her when her eyes drift down to our entwined fingers, which makes a smug smile grow until my face.

She starts to laugh, looking up at me with her eyebrow raised before she breaks out laughing, leaving it quiet enough not to be heard by anyone else, but still enough to get me seriously paranoid, maybe I'm holding her hand too tight, fuck I must look desperate for anything in a skirt right now, before I loosen the grip I'm surprised when she actually tightens it, laugh stopping, facing forward as we continue to talk, face turning serious. 'Emily...' she says pleasure in her voice, I hesitant 'yeah?' I breathe out.

'Why aren't you wearing any shoes?'

My eyes snap down to my feet, and indeed she's right, bare feet slapping against the tough icy floors, my first thought is how easily it was for me to forget the fact that my feet were freezing all just because she was holding my hand, and my second thought? Fucking hell this definitely cannot be hygienic. 'Shit I didn't even realise' she nods lips turning into a smirk 'maybe I should go back and put some on'

'well that's too late now, we're here' I look up to see what she's looking at, because frankly we're not anywhere but where I have been for the past week, blank walls still swarming in my mind, 'wow Miss Campbell, You woke me up early morning to take me to the prison halls' I say sarcastically, before she raises her hand meaning that my hand automatically lifts with hers, before she points in the direction of a brown oak door, steel metal tab placed across the centre 'Miss Campbell' I look over at her looking smug face laughing

'They gave you an office?' she mocks being offended, hands on the door handle before turning around and raising an eyebrow at me 'where do you think I do all my hard work? I don't just stand in the cafeteria all day watching for confrontation' she mocks, finally getting the door open, waving her hands for me to enter which I kindly do, the first thing you do when you've been locked in a shit whole and get to see a new room? Take in the exterior. It's different to what I've been used to in the last weeks, the walls are a very glossy white which means it's giving the room natural light unlike the horrible dull orange light that blasts around these prisons. Computer on a desk in the corner and one of those official swirly office chairs which makes me smile and I don't know why.

'I'll be back now' she says, unfortunately letting go of my hand, as she slips into the tiny built in closet she has in her office, I'm secretly hoping when she comes back out she'll be completely naked and offering me some office table sex, I snap out of the thought, smiling when I see she has photo's pinned up on a corkboard, Obviously I'm not going to give up the chance to see what she's like when she isn't in her prison officer bitch mode. I make my way over, whilst keeping an eye out on the door Naomi's in, I don't know how she would react to a convict looking at her private things. I instantly smile at the view of the pictures, but one catches my eye, smile dropping straight away, Naomi with some masculine man, looks like it's taken in a park, happy smiles all round as he wraps his giant protective arms around her, with his bushy black hair blowing in the breeze.

'I hate those photos' I jump out of my skin, grabbing my chest as she smirks at the fact that she's just caught me red handed nearly overheating at her and her perfect maybe ex boyfriend, I don't hide the fact that I've been looking at it, there's just no point 'boyfriend?' I ask, pointing to the photo, she doesn't move her face to look at it, keeping it facing me as she looks from the corner and then back to me 'step-brother' she confirms, scanning my face again for a reaction, I remain tight lipped simply nodding, not really knowing whether to ask more about her life.

'Anyway, look what I got you' turns out I didn't have to worry about starting the conversation up again.

I look at her intrigued, she's smiling, like really smiling at this thing she's got to show me _please take your top off_ I turn around to see that she has placed a hold all bag on her desk, I know that bag, it's my fucking bag that never actually got checked, and never actually got back to me, I instantly speed walk over to it, ripping the zip open and smiling down at the familiar scent and also sight of my clothes I think I'm actually going to start crying.

'Found it in the admissions office' I hear Naomi, walking up behind me as I continue to admire my clothes and other belongings I was allowed to bring into this hellhole 'thought it would be handy to you obviously, and there slow bastards down there so you might not of ended up getting-' she's cut off by swinging my body around and grabbling her into a giant hug, fuck it, prison warden who isn't supposed to be friendly to the inmates or not, I'm so fucking grateful. I hear her take a deep breath, secretly hoping she's just sniffing in my scent 'thanks Naomi seriously, I'm not the most girliest of girls but even I couldn't live without my clothes' she laughs nervously and I realise that my hand a drifted a little bit south, I immediately fly back out of her grip, her still smiling.

'hmm, no problem' she says, eyes not meeting mine, backing away from me a little, I turn around continuing to look through my bag in amazement, when it hits me, I stop my hands, turning back around to see her sat in her office chair, watching me go through my bag 'so you woke me up so I could come and get my bags?'

Her eyes go wide, she starts to play around with stationary on the desk 'well yeah, I figured I might be too busy tomorrow so you wouldn't get it' I'm too unconvinced to leave it there.

'And nobody else could have brought it to me tomorrow?'

'Look, you've said thank you, why can't you just fucking leave it there?' she snaps, and well hello return of Miss Campbell, I sigh looking at her bored, guiltiness run all over her face again, I mutter a quiet sorry before turning back around, going through my bag again, anything to distract me from the tension that's just been spread across the room.

'Fuck sake' I hear her sigh in frustration, there's something else, she can't seriously tell me that she woke me up in the middle of the night, broke a rule by getting me out of my cell, brought me back to her office all to do something that other officer could have done tomorrow at an appropriate time, I stop randomly folding my clothes for a second to think, she does look upset and she did say I'm alright to talk to so fuck it, without turning around I start to talk.

'Sharon Jones was the one that attacked me' I hear her chair wheels scrape against the floor, from the corner of my eye I see her eyes on me, leaning on her elbows on the desk listening to me 'only I'm not supposed to tell you because apparently that's breaking some inmate rule in prison' I laugh bitterly before continuing 'I was set up by someone I thought I could trust' I turn around now, her eyes wide with concern, I move closer to her 'oh and to top it all off, my mum hasn't visited once and I'm afraid that's because she thinks It was actually me who tried to murder that girl, and I haven't told anyone this' she closes her eyes now, opening them again to look at me deeply 'so whatever is bothering you'

'Who say's something's both-'

I cut her off 'you can tell me, because I'm not some type of _psycho_, or I'm not going to _stab_ you in the back' I quote her words from the first time we ever actually spoke, and I see a light smile graze her features, she puffs out a breath seemly to prepare to talk before she looks me dead in the eye

'I'm just so angry, I needed to talk to someone and well I didn't exactly want a heart to heart with officer walker' I laugh at this making her smile, before she gets her concentration back 'so I thought that maybe' she stutters, blushing slightly 'I thought that you might be awake when I was doing the corridor inspections' I nod my head 'but you were a sleep so...'

'You used the excuse of giving my clothes back to wake me up?' I confirm, she nods her head looking slightly embarrassed. I start to laugh and her head snaps up to mine, nervous smile on her face 'well that's just stupid, I study journalism, I love to fucking talk' I say, the nervousness falls from her, but she remains silent.

'Does this have anything to do with your dad catching us in the toilets?' and wow you really can't say that sentence without sounding like a slut who's just had a random slag in a club cubicle. I blush but she just nods her head, I let her go silent waiting for her to want to talk.

'there is this programme in London, it's for trainees like me' she says quietly 'my dad run's it, it's a 4 month training programme and then once you've done it you get to move to America and become a warden for private prisons over there' I nod my head showing her I'm following

'You can only apply every 6 months, and well I applied for it about a month ago, but didn't get in' she says the last part bitterly, laughing slightly at it 'That's what he wanted me to see him about, tell me I'm a disappointment and at my age he was already near the top'

'But you just said he runs it, obviously he'd take you being his daughter into consideration?' she shakes her head fiercely at this, 'No, he wanted me to get into this programme by myself, and the funny part was that from the 4 times I've applied I really thought this year I would have a chance' she shakes her head again 'but no, he denied me again, apparently I haven't got what it takes yet and have to change my attitude if I ever want it'

'Sorry,' I say quietly, and she just sends me a small smile 'and that's where officer walker comes into it' suddenly the story becomes a whole lot more interesting for me 'Dad set the whole thing up, apparently having a respectable man of the force on my arm would really prove I was growing up' she mocks with her voice, and I look on in amazement because I 100% knew she didn't like that nasty pervert of a man.

'Oh god, I thought you actually liked him' I blurt out, instead redness going to my face and she bursts out laughing, 'thanks Emily' she says after a while and I just nod my head at her in understanding 'I've never actually tried to speak to one of the inmates before' I laugh at this

'Believe me, I wish I didn't have to speak to them' I reply and she just smirks

'Oh and don't worry and Jones and her girls, they'll be out and put into a different sector of the prison by tomorrow'

**

* * *

**

It had been a couple of days since mine and Naomi's office talk, it had also been a couple of days since I had been given my clothes back, and I know it's weird but something as small as that made me feel better about myself now, I didn't have to walk around in tattered grey joggers and the matching grey hoodie anymore. I felt refreshed and nice. Me and Naomi would talk now, in front of other officers it would only be official talk, but when she caught me wandering through the halls or just randomly in the canteen we'd talk like we did in the office, two people of the same status, no younger and older, and definitely no officer and inmate. We wouldn't talk about much really, and in fact I was eager to learn a serious amount more about her, but at least it was something. As for Effy, the first two days of ignoring her was kind of hard for me, especially being stuck in literally a 4 by 4 room, but then she decided to stop trying and started to ignore me too, and then on the 3rd day she got sent down to the isolation room for mouthing off to an officer during morning canteen work, so that meant it made it easier now that I hadn't seen her for nearly 2 days.

'Hey Em' came the voice from above me, I put look over my book, just as she snakes her hand down to steel one of the chips off my plate, taking the seat in front of me 'Hey Karen' I smack her hand as she goes back in to grab a handful 'oh and help yourself' I say dripping with sarcasm which she starts to laugh at 'don't mind if I do babe' she mutters in between munching the chips down, I roll my eyes going back to my book

'Emily, why are you reading a book?' she asks generally confused, I put it down on the table, amused look in my eye 'because what is there better to do in here?' she nods her head smiling in defeat, silence again, continuing the page on my book.

'Well what's it about?'

'It's just poetry' I reply casually

'Poetry?' she repeats, I nod at her before she starts to smile again 'well why are you sitting over here alone?'

I did it a lot recently, avoiding contact from as many people as possibly, apart from Pandora and Karen anymore I actually didn't like any of the people in here, if they weren't rude they were just purely aggressive and I really didn't want to be mixed in with anymore shit, things had changed now that Jones and her girls had been moved like Naomi had promised, and I just wanted to be alone in a corner, out of everything.

'I like quiet when I read' I give her the short answer, she reaches over tugging on the book till I release it from my finger tips, slamming it down gently on the table until she's got my full attention 'she's been looking at you like a puppy dog for ages' she says, and I raise my eyebrow 'who?' I question whilst scanning my eyes around the room to see what she means, she grabs my arm lightly laughing 'fucking hell Em, don't make it obvious alright? Look to your left'

I do what she tells me, and approximately 3 tables away from me sits, Effy, her eyes snap away when she see's I'm looking and focuses back to whatever she was talking about with a blonde haired inmate, I roll my eyes facing back to Karen, she smiles 'Listen Em, I don't know what she did but just forgive her' she asks, I scoff, picking my chips with my fingers

'No way, she's a completely different person to what she shows everybody else' I say deviant and she sighs sadness flashing over her face 'Okay I agree, she's complicated but who doesn't come with baggage' she argues back, I look at her bored

'except she hasn't just got baggage, she's got fucking boxes and suitcases aswell!' she bursts out laughing at this, looking from the corner of my eyes Effy's looking over at our table sadly but fuck her, I'm not going to feel sorry for some fucking psychopathic boyfriend slaughterer. Her laughter get's more controlled and her face turns serious 'I miss seeing you around all the time' she says sadly continuing 'It's different this time, she really likes you. I think it's because you remind her of herself when she was first in this place'

'Yeah, scared, vulnerable, and an easy fucking target' I scoff again 'sorry Karen, I just can't do it alright?'

'fine' she says reaching over and grabbing more chips 'I'll leave it there then' she says smiling at me, looking over at Effy and shaking her head slowly and sadly, which makes me smile knowing that she's tried to use Karen just to gain my trust again, I want to tell her to get some balls and do it herself.

'Effy's not the only puppy dog you know' I look at Karen confused, picking up my book and trying to find the page that she rudely interrupted me on 'let's just say, blonde, always stands over by the main door with the rest of the officers, and hasn't kept her eyes off you since you walked in here' words die in my throat, look of pure smugness up on Karen's face. 'So what's the goss on you and Campbell?' she asks and in my head it's like she's just shouted it over a mike at Wembley fucking stadium, I'm leaping across the table and putting my finger to her lips faster than she said it 'Karen, fucking hell she's right there' I gesture to my eyes to the main door, there's a table there where all the guards sit when we're at lunch to make sure that no shit goes down. If I'm honest I'm quite aware of how long Naomi's been looking over at me slyly, because I've been doing the exact same right back, only more discrete.

'so there is gossip then?' she beams at me, I remain tight lipped, shaking my head at her but she raises her eyebrow not looking convinced 'oh fucking hell' she grins at me, leaning closer and looking around like a spy 'you're not in love are you' I snort out a laughter, making part of my chewed up chip fly across the table 'oh god' I breath out through the laughter 'it takes more than someone to break me out of my cell and give my bags back to make me fall in love with them'

'She did what?' she asks, surprised, oh fuck.

'Karen'

'She broke you out-'

'Listen, I'm not supposed to tell anybody okay? Can you possibly please keep this a secret' I bat my eyelashes at her and she smiles, tapping her fingers on the tip of her nose 'It's our little secret' she winks at me and I laugh, she looks thoughtful for a second

'oh god this is like Romeo and Juliet' she says, standing up 'forbidden to see your true love by the nasty prison guards' she says dramatically, putting her hand on her head in a fainting sign for effect, If I haven't told you already Karen is a complete and total drama queen, wants to be in the west end and completely nothing else, I have to give it to her though, she is a pretty good dancer and singer from the amount of time she keeps showing me what she does.

'You seem extra cheerful today?' I say as she lightly dances in front of me, she stops, nodding her head excitedly before sitting by back in front of me 'My brother Freddie is coming to visit me today, it's the first time since I've been in here because dad wouldn't let him but then he told him to piss off so now he's coming' I smile at this, sometimes I don't tell Katie how much I appreciate the fact that she nearly comes to see me everyday 'and he's completely amazing, doesn't care what I like at all because he'll get used to it' she rubs her hands together in excitement before looking down at her watch 'shit actually, better go ask one of the guards to let me back into my cell, wouldn't want to let my little brother think I've let myself go now' with this she smiles and strokes my hand gently one last time before disappearing away.

And what did I have planned for the whole afternoon? I had to go and have my medical check update; hopefully they don't find anything too drastic up with me so they'll end up keeping me for fucking hours.


	7. Chapter 7

**School finished for summer today! although summer in england usually means rain but you know...**

**I'm really tired at the moment so this might not be the best, but I like to update! ahaha let me know what you think!**

**and thanks for reviews/reading/favourites... **

'Right ladies it's Friday, You know the drill' All of the inmates had be gathered in the hall, today was Friday's inspection of all the cells and to make sure we don't go back in time to hide the stuff we weren't meant to have we all had to be put together. I was sitting at the back alone, I didn't mind it really, everyone had their own group, or in this place known as a gang, and I just drifted around, I was becoming pretty close friends with Karen, closer than I thought me and Effy were ever going to become anyway. I still had my rule though; don't become to close because in the end anybody could turn out like Elizabeth Stonem. A couple minutes through the speech I was joined by Karen, smiling as she took the seat next to me, unfortunately she was followed by Pandora and Effy which I couldn't really protest to since they all knew each other longer than I had been in here. I wasn't talking to her again, but I had to put up with her since she was always there, luckily she wasn't much of a talker anyway.

'Which guard do you reckon will do your cell?' Karen whispers to me, I'm torn between listening to her and watching smug Mr Walker look at all the women here like a meat of piece, I still hate that twat 'Don't know' I whisper back, she points at one of them smirking at me 'I hope I get him in mine' well it is someone I'd expect Karen to want, tanned skin, jet black short hair and a not so bad body, well we haven't seen under his uniform yet. I laugh at her glowing face, and she turns to me smirking 'wouldn't mind him searching through my knickers draws' I snort at this very loudly, making her burst out laughing to, Governor Campbell throwing me a stern glare from the corner, Yeah that's right, apparently he's only ever around when mildly important things are happening in this place.

'So what do you say Em?' I catch the end of Karen's sentence, also the side nudge to my ribs by time I've actually turned around to face her 'about what?' I ask, keeping my eyes on Governor Campbell who seems to be keeping his eyes on me too, I don't really see his problem, all he does is sit in his office all day letting the guards do all the work, the uptight bastard. 'About having Campbell searching your knickers draw' my Jaw hits the floor, nearly dying of the blush colour my cheeks have gone because of the fact that she said that louder than her normal voice, I hear Pandora choke back a laugh from the side of Karen, Effy staying silent.

'Karen, please stop bringing it up' I whisper, leaning in to her more 'mainly the fact that we're surrounded by the entire inmates and her dad is currently glaring at me' she follows my gaze to the Gov, thankfully he's actually looking at Mr Walker speaking now 'well' she says smirking 'he wouldn't want his little girl to run off his track of life would he?' I turn to her, opening my mouth to ask what she means but she puts a finger up to my lips, smiling.

'Girls' I literally jump in the spot, voice coming from behind us, only Karen has that sparkle in her eye, the one that says she knew she was behind me, I'll have to thank her for shutting me up, even though there are four of us sitting on the back row, Naomi's only looking at me, albeit shyly that is, 'Can I have a word with you Emily?' she asks, nodding her head by her shoulder, probably wanting it in private, I nod my head dumbly to the situation

'You can do whatever you want with Emily Miss' Karen says, low voice and Naomi's eyes go wide with confusion, she looks at me with a questioning look and I just shrug as the girls break out into laughter, I accidently happen to punch Karen's arm as I stand up out of my seat 'sorry _babe' _I glare at her, as she rubs her arm in a half painful half amusement way.

I follow out behind Naomi, the inspection talk still going on behind me as I exit the hall, it's not like I even really need to listen, the only thing I have in my room is tooth paste and that's hardly going to harm someone is it, Effy's safe too, waking me up this morning with the noise of her flushing the last of the pills down the toilet, I just rolled over in my bed pretending to fall back a sleep when her guilty eyes fell upon mine.

She stops half way down the halls, turning to me with a small smile on her face that isn't quite like the ones she usually gives me, she takes a deep breath 'Emily, there's been a request from someone who wants to visit you' she says gently, and I look up at her intrigued 'they were automatically going to reject the request, but I made them wait for your permission first' Now I'm slightly confused

'Request? Who is it?' she bites her lip.

* * *

No words were spoken between us, I didn't even want to look at her and It didn't look like she was going to make the effort to talk to me either, it didn't even look like she wanted to fucking be here, but strangely I felt like this was an opportunity and I'd definitely regret if I turned it down.

'Why are you here?' I ask with no emotion, her eyes snap up from her interesting finger nails and look me dead in the pupil.

'My therapist thought it might help me' she says, voice waving as she looks at me, taking in my appearance, my clothes, my hair as if she hadn't seen me before 'get over the attack' she concludes and I laugh bitterly, fists shaking with anger

'You're taking the piss aren't you?' I spit at her quietly, not enough to get the guards suspicious 'I can't believe you had the nerve to come here, haven't you done enough?' she shakes her head more confidently, resting her locking knuckles onto the table

'I think you brought this on yourself' she comments, and I nearly leap across the table to strangle the bitch, but I remembered I promised Naomi I'd remain calm, 'come on,' I laugh slightly 'there's no court or cameras around now Jenny, you can give up the act now'

She looks around, looks at the guards, looks at the inmates, looks at their visitors, then she leans into me, eyes full of guilt, pleading with me 'You don't understand' her voice breaks but I have no sympathy at all 'she was going to kill me and...'

'And I was the easy opinion? Don't you dare come in here with bullshit' I sit back in my chair, she moves away also, 'you're going to confess' I tell her, she starts laughing bitterly shaking her head, leaning back in the chair, this is when she realises that I'm the person locked up here, not her.

'And who's going to believe you?' she shoots out at me, rubbing her hands together before placing them back down on the table 'you want to know why I'm really here?' she asks, smiling a little before leaning over, right in front of my face

'To warn you if your psycho sister doesn't stop stalking me my acting skills might have to get better' she does a throaty chuckle as I look at her in disgust 'maybe they'll make you rot in this place if I tell them how emotional I've been feeling lately'

Without thinking, I'm on my feet and my chairs being thrown back, hands launched around her neck 'I'm going to fucking kill you' I shout, as she battles my hands away, screaming coming from both of us as five or more guards come flying my way, 'You've ruined my life' I cry out, tears rolling down my face as she battles my hands away, her throwing punches too now as guards hold both of us back 'I don't care how long it takes, I'll fucking prove it you bitch!' I promise, fucking promise her deadly in the eye that she hasn't won just yet

'Emily!' Naomi joins the rest of the guards trying to battle me off her, for five people they can't stop the utter anger that running through my veins, me being dragged back as shes standing there crying, protected by another two guards that are comforting her, I crumble right here right now. 'Let go' Naomi demands me, looking me deadly in the eye as I try and pry myself from her arms, eventually giving up when I finally break down in tears

'Get her down to isolation' one of the guards shouts at Naomi, as she continues to hold gently onto my wrists, hopefully trusting that I'm not trying to break away from her.

'She's just upset' Naomi reasons with them, but he gives her a stern look 'Isolation now Campbell' he shouts, as they drag me out the visitors hall, I'm still broken, completely torn, I don't get how the world can be so cruel, I don't get how one person can be so fucking cruel, and the funny part is that I probably hate the victim more than the person who actually stabbed her. Next thing I know I'm arriving in isolation, it's different but still similar to the room Naomi put me in on my first day, it's still cold, smells disgusting and completely dirty, but it's not dark, that's the only thing I couldn't stand, the darkness.

'I'm going to stay here for a bit' I hear her mutter to the guard that helped her take me here, I'm in the corner, head down, legs tucked up to my torso, tears drying on the knees of my jeans, there's some more talking going on which is very distant to me before the door is slammed shut, silent rains.

'What the fuck was that?' she shouts at me from above, I can hear her feet pacing the room, I ignore her, trying to get my thoughts together without having someone shout in my fucking face 'great way to prove your innocence, by strangling the girl'

'Do you ever fucking shut up' I mutter under my arms, the room goes silent 'what?' she asks, stepping closer to me, I lift my arms, looking up at her frustrated face, hair hanging everywhere from where she's been running her hands through it 'I said do you ever fucking shut up' I repeat calmly, she looks at me in disbelief.

'Stop speaking to me like that, I'm your fucking prison officer!'

'Can you cut the whole prison officer shit please?' I say, using the wall to lift my weight out the floor and face her, she sighs in frustration looking at me 'what do you mean _shit_, this is my career, it's not fucking shit!' my face breaks, wiping tears with my hands before looking up at her 'well lucky you, but what about me? Everything's ruined, everything I spent my teenage years doing is ruined' I cry, she walks forward but I stop her with my hand

'What happens when I finally get out in a couple of years time? No one's going to want to hire a fucking convict, all my friends will have their amazing careers, my family are going to be ashamed of me, fucking hell the only girlfriend I'm ever going to get will own a fucking biker bar, so I'm sorry for my violent outbreak on that fucking bitch okay?'

She doesn't answer; she looks stunned completely and utterly stunned

'I... You're gay?'

Where did that come from? One minute we're talking about careers and the next she's- oh shit. Well done Emily, come out to the girl you fancy while you're having a emotional breakdown, don't act like it's a big thing, so what you're gay... why should it matter, I cough straightening my back.

'Seriously, out of everything I've just said to you, you want to talk about my sexuality?' she blushes, eyes widening falling to the floor 'No!' she defends herself timidly, pacing around the room a little more jumpier than before 'Of course not' she whispers, I sigh, leaning my head against the wall

'What am I going to do' I mutter to myself, slightly knocking my head against the wall 'I even think Katie's losing faith in getting me out of this shit hole' she clears her throat 'and Katie's your...'

'Sister' I finish, turning around to face her smiling slightly 'Sorry about before, this' I gesture around the place 'is really great' she looks at me as if I'm crazy so I elaborate 'well obviously not for me, I meant your career' I finish and she laughs slightly shaking her head 'It's not me' she says sadly 'none of this shit is me'

'Then what's stopping you from not doing it?'

She shrugs her shoulders, turning around to avoid my question 'let me know you' I whisper, which again goes ignored, I don't think she actually even heard me when it comes down to it.

**

* * *

**

Naomi left the isolation room because apparently she wasn't allowed to stay in there with me all day said one of the guards, and me, well I had a good old meeting with the governor of the place, fighting with inmates he wouldn't bat a eyelid, but fighting with the person you supposedly tried to kill is serious business in his book and he wants to show me that. I was being led to his office now by walker, handcuffs and everything; my wrists were starting to get tired from the things. Somehow his office was different from the rest, well first of all there seemed to be an office outside his office where you sit and wait till he calls you in.

'sit down Fitch, he'll call you when he's ready' so there I was, sat on one of the uncomfortable chairs alone outside his office, the door was slightly ajar and already voices coming from it, obviously I'm going to listen to how tough he's probably going to get on me.

'So, I told you we were rejecting it and what do you do?' comes the raised voice from the office, I look around to see if there is anybody else in here, fuck maybe he has his own secretary, but nope, only me.

Whoever he's with doesn't answer the question so he continues 'you go and tell her without my permission, you know it's a policy to always get my permission, what are you, an officer or a best friend to the inmates?'

'Officer' comes the quiet reply.

'Good, that whole drama could of be avoided today if it wasn't for you Naomi' my ears snap to attention, 'this will have to go down on the trainee programme record'

'No dad, come on it was a mistake'

'There shouldn't be any mistakes coming from you!' he shouts and I'm moving towards the door already, I'm actually wondering what the fuck I'm doing. I must be fucking crazy, I stand outside contemplating whether to enter or not, this isn't her fault that I'm a complete fuck up, it's my fucking fault, I push the door open and his eyes instantly snap to mine, hers quickly following.

'Did I call for you yet?' he spits at me, I swallow shaking my head at him

'Nai- Miss Campbell didn't tell me about the visitor request' I say quietly, keeping my eyes on him as he tries to kick me to the ground, 'I mean, I told her that I knew about it... but she tried to stop me from accepting it' I flick my eyes to her fast, a look of utter disbelief is splattered across her face, my eyes turn back to the unconvinced governor, fucking hell Emily, manipulate him or something.

'Impossible' he says, throwing a shit eating grin at me, 'those requests are stored in your personal file and'

'And I stole the file' I stutter, still holding onto the door frame for support. 'No... During my medical meeting, she left the room and I took a quick look at my file, I broke the privacy policy', I state nodding my head at him; he looks between me and Naomi before smiling.

'Is this true Naomi?' I quickly nod my head at her, eyes telling her to say yes, she sighs before nodding hers and he lets out a aspirated groan 'well well well Fitch, aren't you turning out to be quite the riot?' I keep my eyes plastered to the floor.

'Well, your suitcase will be taken away for 2 weeks; you're on canteen duty for a month and you're not allowed to go back into the yard until I say so, got it?' I nod my head shamelessly at him, he smiles smugly 'great, now go back outside till I actually shout you this time okay? And Naomi'

'I'm sorry' He says, and my eyes snap up in surprise 'You can go now' he dismisses her, and I'm already out the door before he can actually say anything else to me, I hear the door close over behind me from where she's left

'Emily' she says gently, soft hand on my shoulder, I turn around with a small smile on my face, but that's not what I see on her face, next thing I know, I'm being pushed back around the small wall that blocks the office windows from the sight of the room, and she's staring down at me, hands tightly grabbed at my shoulders, legs making my leg jam against the solid stone, and before I even have time to ask what's going on, her lips are slammed against mine, it's not passionate but it's not pointless, it's nothing but a peck but it just is.

I look at her with fright in my eyes when she pulls away, she's clearly shocked herself when she untangles her hands from my shoulders, releasing my body again 'I want to let you know me' she whispers, 'I want to tell you everything' and with that, her and her frightened eyes leave me against the wall as the room doors slams shut.


	8. Chapter 8

**Hi! Is it just me or is FF being a complete twat lately with it's 'chapter not found' shit?**

**annnnyway! thanks for all the reviews, I seriously love reading them. also I hope you're enjoying a locked up Emily Fitch ;) haha.**

**chapter 8! enjoy.**

'Why are you dressed like a tramp again?' she was doing it again, ignoring the death look I was throwing her when I walked into the visitors hall, basically ignoring everything about me except my fucking clothes, that's right I was back in the plain old black vest top and grey joggers again, suitcase taken away from me immediately. She eyed me disgusting me before reaching my face and smiling waiting for me to answer, she was about to talk again when I interrupted her

'Jenny came to see me' her smile dropped, and she looked at me as if I was insane for a minute, smirking a little until she saw the deadly serious expression on my face and she erupts, banging both of her tightly squeezed palms down on the table and spitting out with vicious anger

'She what? Why the fuck did these bastards even let her in!' she continues 'and then what happened? She thanked you for saving her life quietly and then said some shit about feeling guilty before she left right?' she mocked, I just kept my calm gaze on her 'am I right?' she repeats frustrated, I shake my head at her.

'that bitch didn't have one guilty bone in her body' I scoff, looking over her shoulder I notice Effy sitting on the waiting room seats, waiting for her visitor to arrive which would no doubt be her boyfriend since he was the only person to ever visit her, her eyes where once again plastered to mine giving me that homeless puppy dog look, I rolled my eyes because that's all she's been doing for weeks now, not actually trying to make it up to me at all, I turn my attention back to Katie catching the end of her sentence

'And the girls said they'll come with me next time I see Jenny so we'll sort the bitch out'

My hands leap forward, snatching onto Katie while she looks at me surprised 'You can't go and see her again' I protest she starts to laugh, giving me a small smile 'Yes I can Em, I can see it in her eyes, I'm wearing the bitch down' she states proudly giving my fingers a squeeze, I sigh sadly

'She said if you see her again some more shit is going to happen, so you just can't'

'she's just trying to scare you' I shake my head at this retracting my hand from her and linked them together on top of the table 'Please Katie, if not for your benefit too' I plead with her, she takes a deep breath before replying reluctantly 'fine' she mutters . it goes silent then, we don't really talk that much when she's here anymore because there's nothing left to say, but that doesn't mean that her coming to see me is pointless, sometimes I appreciate the silence more than the actual talking, suddenly her eyes snap up to mine, confused expression on her face.

'Why are you being so calm about this?'

'I'm not calm obviously, I'm just being-'

'No' she says accusingly cutting me off 'You're being calm, since you sat down in that seat, and you've got that look on your face like the time you...' she doesn't finish her sentence, massive grin breaking out on her face and I can't help but feel insecure, wrapping my grey hoodie a little tighter around my body and looking at her uncomfortably 'like what? I don't know what you're talking about'

'Like the time you pulled that fit girl at that party we went to' she finishes her sentence, I deny shaking my head from side to side, what I had a look the time I did that? 'What?' I look at her confused, disbelieving look on my face 'I don't understand' I mutter, slight blush entering onto my face.

'You're blushing' she says, pointing to my face which just makes me hide it even more with my palms, this of course makes her laugh and gasp thinking she's worked out what the sudden calm persona is down to, she raises a eyebrow, voice staying low 'You're shagging someone in here aren't you?' I choke on my own spit, 'oh god, it's that girl isn't it... what's her name'

She says, clicking her thumbs about as she tries to think of who I'm 'shagging' but the truth is I'm not shagging anybody, and the fact that she would even know someone's name in here that I would be shagging is even more weird.

'Effy, you're shagging Effy!' she concludes, smiling smugly at me but still looking at me slightly repulsed 'cell mates' she scoffs, beginning to laugh when she sees the reaction on my face, Effys eyes knowingly snap to mine as she makes her way over to her now seated boyfriend, I fix my stare on Katie as she continues to laugh 'I'm not fucking Effy' I mutter sharply at her she just gives me an unconvinced look

'Seriously Katie, I'm not... and even if I was as if I'd go near Effy' I sneer

'So tall, dark and mysterious so isn't your type then?' she gags 'you forgot backstabbing' I mutter under my breath and she raises her eyebrow at me in doubtful 'huh?' she asks, I just smile shrugging my shoulders lazily at her 'right well...' she says, leaning over and kissing my cheek

'Better head off, got to find a dress for the dinner party tonight-' she stops, looking at me guiltily, probably hoping that I didn't hear the sentence she had just started, I look up at her intrigued

'Dinner party?'

She knows she's been caught as she casually pushing her seat back under the table standing behind it, her shoulders slumped and eyes pitched down onto the solid floor

'Yeah, mums idea...' she mutters unwillingly, my heart starts to beat faster; I stand up as well, looking at her in disbelief

'Oh great, too busy to visit her own daughter but she's got time to make a banquet for the fucking family!' tears start to well in my eyes, but I'm not letting them show, I'm sick of wasting my tears on someone who can't even be bothered to see me.

'Emily,' she says quietly 'you know it isn't like that, she's just scared' I laugh at this, her guilty eyes come from the floor to see my hurt ones, her eyes basically reflecting how I feel as well 'well what's it for?' I ask quietly, she shakes her head, reaching over to give my hand a small squeeze 'I'll see you on Monday yeah?' she ensures me, hiking her bag up on her shoulder

'No Katie, tell me' I plead with her and she stops in her tracks, her back facing me but she doesn't turn around 'I got into University' she says, barely audible, but when I hear it my heart stops.

'And you didn't want to tell me?' My voice breaks and she turns around in an instant, pulling the chair back down and taking a seat 'Emily, no! It wasn't that...' she trails off, nervously playing with her pink covered nail polished hands 'it's just... university was always your dream and I really couldn't of gave two shits about it, but then I see you in here...'

'Well I'm glad I inspired someone' I say mockingly, we both stare up at each other before she catches the glint in my eye and we both start laughing, 'I'm happy for you' I say genuinely pleased that Katie actually got into a university, she gives me a shy smile 'I'll look into some journalism courses for you hey?' I laugh again, shaking my head.

'I don't think I want to be a first year at 27'

**

* * *

**

I was on a mission, she had been ignoring me all day, always having a officer standing by her in the canteen so she knew that way I wouldn't come over, almost basically jogging down the halls when we were in the same one for a certain amount of time, it was insane really. She fucking kissed me, it wasn't the other way round, I didn't push her up against a wall, not that I cared that she did anyway, she must like me I mean come on, she fucking kissed me.

When I told Karen what happened she nearly pissed herself, so much like Katie first she wondered why I was again dressed in the prison clothes, I'd basically told her everything, skipping the last part out in till my face turned a pinkish colour and she kept digging until I eventually told her.

'She kissed you?' she was repeatedly blinking now as she was washing the dishes and I was drying, not that she was actually washing them properly, her excuse being her new nails, I nod casually, stacking the plates up to one side of the sink 'and then what happened?'

'she ran away, then avoided me all day today' I say, sneakily lifting my eyes to the officers canteen table in the corner, Naomi wasn't really socialising with them at all, she was just sitting there with her chin on her leaning hands as the rest of the officers talked to her.

'I just can't believe she kissed you' she said, shaking her head lightly with a smirk 'now that is what I call a serious rule break' she splashes her hands back into the soapy water 'and then the cheeky bitch ignores you, as if it's your problem'

'It's fine really' I murmur, flicking my eyes back to their table, all the rest of the officers leaving as Officer walker taps Naomi's back as he gets up from the table leaving her alone, Karen puts her hands onto mine automatically stopping me from drying the last plate 'It's not fine, You really like her and she's just using you when it suits her' That's the thing I liked about Karen from the start, she's genuinely concerned about people, she also won't take shit of anybody which I could really learn from her, it still upsets me that she's set for release in less than a month.

'I don't _really_ like her' I say in a childish tone 'I just fancy her a bit, there's a difference' she nods her head unconvinced 'also she's not using me, she's kissed me once... I'm probably just over reacting' still overreaction or not, It's kind of killing me watching Officer Walker throw flirty looks her way from the main hall door, and for her to send smiles back.

'Fuck it, that's it' Karen says, pulling her hands out of the soapy water and wiping them down the white apron she has on 'I'm going over to say something to her' she announces and my face immediately turns pale 'No, No! You can't do that, she'd get fired or something, and not to fucking mention my embarrassment!' I grab her arm, clearly trying to make sure she remains in the kitchen and not causing an argument with Naomi in the canteen, she laughs gently

'I'm not going to cause a scene Em; I meant I'll have a quiet word'

'Saying what? Please be nice to Emily Miss, she has a crush on you and you're just being mean' I mock and she laughs again, untying her apron from the back and taking the strap from around her neck, oh fuck this is so embarrassing

'Okay, Okay. If I go over there will you stop?' I bargain with her and her hands stop, face lifting with a smirk, she eyes me sceptically before slowly putting her apron back over her head 'you're really going to go over?' she asks, I nod my head taking a deep breath 'if it stops you' I giggle and she joins me.

'Okay, but I'll be watching you' she points her fingers at me which just makes me laugh more, but when I turn around the smile immediately stops and I start to panic, fucking hell what am I meant to say to her? She'll probably tell me off for even approaching her in the canteen. Stop being a twat Emily. Just fucking talk to her.

Blowing out a final breath, I push the kitchen door open and set my sights on her, she's still alone staring down at a half eaten lunch that she's pushing around with her folk, I laugh inside because that's the same exact thing I do every day. I start to walk, thinking of all the fucking things that go wrong when I actually reach her table, I could almost feel Karen's intensive stare in the back of my neck and it fucking burns, after a couple of more steps I'm there, right in front of her she scrunches her eyebrows together at dinner tray before raises her eyes and... Smiles.

'Hey Em' she says, keeping the smile on her face, she scoots along the tables bench a little gesturing with her eyes to it, is this actually Naomi? I stare on in disbelief probably looking like a total twat right now 'where have you been all day?' she says when I don't talk.

Where have I been all day? So you didn't see me this morning at breakfast? You didn't see me when I walked past you in the hall and you almost sprinted? Oh you know I've just been out for a quick drink with the inmates 'where the fuck do you think I've been?' comes out of my mouth instead, she drops her folk, eyes widening looking up at me baffled. Not giving her time to retort I turn on my feet, just enough to see Karen giving me a wink and a thumbs up from the kitchen and head straight over to Officer Walker

'I want to go the library' I say to him, pointing to the locked door behind him, he eyes me doing the usual pretend prison officer shit he does before sighing 'be back in ten minutes' he drags the key from around the chain on his neck, he turns around unlocking the door possibly the slowest he ever has and I tap my foot in impatience feeling two pairs of eyes burning the back of my head now, I push past him with a lousy thanks and then I'm off down the hall. She's so fucking irritating, one minute she's Miss Campbell and the next she's I want to tell you everything. I just don't fucking get her.

I reach the library door handle, pushing down on it and the next thing I know I'm being pushed in, and a strong hold tugging on my left arm, 'what the fuck are you do-' My sentence is cut off when Naomi's lips come slamming against mine again, except this time it actually has passion when she circles her arms around my hips, slamming them towards hers as she walks me back further into the library, I gasp when I feel her tongue try and enter my mouth for the first time, her slamming the library door shut with her foot continuing our journey through the library, I literally have to throw my arms around her neck to keep my balance as my back collides with a book self, knocking some of our greatest history books into a pile below our feet, her eyes are closed, mine are fucking wide open suddenly I feel her mouth turn into a smirk 'I don't like people swearing at me' she mutters through our kiss and I drag my mouth off hers making her eyes flutter open, wiping my hands over my lips as if I'm revolted but really I think I'm about to explode, she frowns.

'Yeah? Well I don't like being ignored' I batted right back to her, hugging my arms around myself again, as I walked down to the back of the library near the couch that was in there, I felt her following me, tiny knocks of her heels hitting against the wooden flooring 'Ignored?' she asks, confusion in her voice which makes me scoff 'Emily, I've been busy today with new arrivals'

I turn around facing her for the first time after our kiss, fucking hell I'm pissed but she's beautiful, like seriously college girls cannot live up to how beautiful this fucking woman is, blonde hair now straightened just glowing, lips blushed with traces of her light red lipstick now smudged below the bottom lip, I frown 'too busy to even look at me?' her eyes soften, as they focus hard on mine, I actually have to divert mine from hers straight away.

Her hand lifts up, scooping a red lock from my view, leaving her hand caressing over my cheek as I look up slowly, amused smile on her lips as she continues with her thumb to draw light circles 'well it's not like I was looking at anybody else' she comments smugly and my hand rips hers away from my face

'Stop doing that, stop being so touchy feely'

'But I thought you...' she frowns, not finishing her sentence, she shakes her head lightly more to herself then me, opening her eyes before she straightens up her shoulders 'I just wanted to thank you for what you done yesterday' she says, keeping her stare with mines and I shrug my shoulders

'Never heard of a handshake?' she bites her lip, probably to block the smile I can see forming onto her face, but before it's even arrived its gone again 'Look I didn't mean to scare you'

'You didn't scare me' I blurt out straight away 'I'm the gay one here aren't I?' I say quietly, her eyes automatically hit the floor, her hands dropping by her sides, 'I better go...' she says, pointing to the door before giving me a small smile and turning around, I sigh making sure she hears me 'Right, see you Miss Campbell' I add in mockery rolling my eyes as I watch her retreating figure walk down the library, stepping over the books that came tumbling down through our heated kiss which she's seems to of forgot about all of a sudden. Opening the door, she stops before turning around the corner 'I'm on the late shift again tonight' she taps her fingers against the door frame, before it's closed gently and she's gone.

I pretended to be a sleep that night, of course I couldn't actually really sleep knowing that she was crawling the halls outside my cell until late hours, around 2 am the dim light came shining through my cell bouncing off the dull wall that I was facing and that's when I knew it was her. The gentle footsteps pacing there way over to the bunks until a cold hand landed on my arm, I tried my best not to flinch, I wasn't going anywhere with her tonight. 'Emily' she whispers gently like the first time she did this, shaking my body lightly trying her best to wake me up but I didn't budge, when the shakes got a little harder I still didn't budge, she sighs stopping for a while before I hear the sound of hard boots stamping their way down the hall, probably the other officer that's meant to be on duty with her, her hand stops on my arm and she changes the pace, lightly stroking it 'fucking hell' she mutters before my arm is left cold, and the door of the cell is shut again. Karen was right in a way, she says jump and I'm fucking flying, I constantly have to guess what mood she'll be in everyday.

* * *

The prison was having one of those annual pain in the ass days, a fucking how to deal with stress workshop was the first thing on our schedule in the morning, a full hour of some woman telling us about the strategies we could use to get through our time in jail stress free, a loud of shit if you ask me. We were waiting outside the room waiting for them to get ready for the presentation, Karen wasn't here today, lucky bitch getting out of it to go to a meeting with her lawyer, so when I say we I basically mean me with my shoulders against the wall waiting for my name to be called.

'Fitch' shouts the voice from the bottom of the hall, I sigh, 'finally' I mutter turning around, just to be faced that tight white blouse, officers badge hanging from the chain around her neck, shy eyes looking down at me from the height above. 'I came to see you yesterday' she says, putting her hand out to rest on the wall, kind of blocks me from walking away really

'Yeah?' I ask, diverting my eyes down to the floor, she clears her throat 'yeah' she repeats

'You were asleep though' she says, raising her free hand, scratching the side of her head nervously

I just shrug casually 'Sorry, Gets kind of tiring being locked up in here every day' I don't know if I feel more awkward now making up an excuse when she might know I was pretending to sleep or the fact that I actually need to give an excuse to her anyway. She nods knowingly, 'so,' she starts, I look up at her expectantly 'maybe we can-'

'Fitch, I've shouted you once, so get down here!' she jumps slightly, releasing her arm from the wall to look behind me, noticing the obvious queue that's leading up to the hall and the angry officer who's waiting for me.

'Better go' I sigh, I walk a couple of steps 'see you round Miss Campbell' I say without turning around, one thing's for sure though, I like her. I really like her.

I'm just anticipating the chase.


	9. Chapter 9

**Hello! how're we all? This is chapter 9! **

**Hope you're all enjoying it, thanks for reading/reviews/favourites...**

**:)!**

'No Emily, wait' came the frustrated voice from behind me, I was currently facing a red faced prison officer who had been shouting my name for the last ten minutes, so to say he was slightly pissed off would be an understatement, the look of pure joy when he finally got me in the workshop room was immediately wiped off his face when Naomi's voice filled the halls and I stopped mid doorway, small smile plastered on my face that she wasn't going to let me walk away again 'I want to talk to you'

'Sorry Campbell, Orders from Walker to bring her in here' he states, making a horrible snorting noise whilst pulling his loose fitting trousers up by his belt, I turn around shyly, waiting by the door way as other inmates scurry past me to get their seats, her eyes don't leave mine until he commands me to go in 'I'll only be 2 minutes' Naomi says bitterly, he shakes his head pointing for me to enter the room.

'No can do, Walker wants everyone to be seated...'

Hard footsteps bring my attention from the now sweating officer and straight to Naomi who's now pacing down the hall, charging towards him, she stops, towering over him because let's face it, he's a short stubby man and she's some kind of goddess wearing heels 'You. Stay' she says sharply to me, clicking her fingers together as she points to a nearby wall for me to stand, she then turns back round to the officer with a fake smile.

'Sorry, but who are you?' she says, lowering her head to look at the pass hanging around the chain similar to hers around his neck, he swallows hard, gulp in his throat as I stare on in wonder at how she can make a grown man nearly piss himself 'Officer Thomas' he says quietly adding a feeble 'Miss' on the end when she eyes him amused before she purses her lips together, bending her shoulder to point her fingers at me not turning around 'Well Thomas, I want to talk to Emily' she states not really waiting for him to reply, but being the stupid man he is, he replies.

'Miss, Officer Walker-'

'Is Officer Walker your boss?' she cuts him off, he shakes his head slowly confused 'No' he answers, and she nods 'and would you kiss his ass if he asked you to?' I snort, my laugh echoing down the halls before I slap my hand over my mouth, while he looks horrified she turns around, sending me a small smirk before she's back with him in her vision 'No!' he shouts defensively and she backs away a little, giving him room to breathe for his now hyperventilating body

'I need to talk to Emily' she repeats, he nods fake smile over his chapped lips 'sure Miss' he answers and she pats him on the shoulder satisfied, fuck this would be a really bad moment to talk about how turned on the last 5 minutes of watching her as made me, the last of the girls enter the workshop room and he eyes the door probably looking for somewhere to run away from Naomi, 'Fitch, you're with Campbell' he shouts before speeding towards the room, and shutting it, leaving once again us alone in the hallway.

'I was really looking forward to that' I joke to break the tension, she smiles slightly, walking back over to me, I squirm uncomfortably when she returns in the same position as before, me backed against the wall and her arms resting on it, blocking me from anywhere else but her 'and who's the one doing the ignoring now?' she whispers lightly,

'This is the first time I've seen you today...' I trail off and she shakes her head lightly, shyly not meeting my eyes again as she mumbles 'last night'

Last night... as in when she pushed me into the library and completely devoured my lips with hers, not that I'm complaining obviously, but still ignoring, Coming from the fucking expert of it that's pretty funny.

'You weren't a sleep' Oh, that last night. My eyes suddenly fall hiding behind my lashes as her sad eyes burn into mine, her arms come off the wall which fills me with relief that I'm not being trapped by anything anymore 'Yes I was' the familiar feel of her hands falls upon my cheek again, slightly lifting my face until I'm meeting those blue pools again 'Don't lie' she speaks softly, removing her hand and walking away from me slightly.

'Why would I lie? I didn't even know you came in to see me so-'

'You weren't snoring' she blurts out, squeezes her lips together as she curses herself but not loud enough for me to hear what she's saying 'you always snore, sometimes it's so loud I wonder how you can even sleep' she starts laughing gently to herself before narrowing her eyes back at me, I'm stood looking at her astonished 'and last night, you didn't snore'

I ignore her finding me out straight away, heading to the main point that is now probably tattooed into my fucking brain 'How did you know that?' she raises an eyebrow at me, looking confused 'how did you know about my snoring?' I say quietly, leaning closer into her as if it's a secret she shrugs taking no notice of the fact that I wanted an actual answer

'So you didn't want to talk to me?' the distress in her eyes is unbearable, she's not tough bad ass Miss Campbell who get anyone to do what she wants, she's vulnerable Naomi who just wants someone to talk to, I'm just wondering when she's going to fuck off Miss Campbell and keep the latter.

'It's not that I didn't want to talk to you' I sigh, she scoffs

'No? Well next time I won't risk someone fucking catching me just for you to fuck me off anyway'

I laugh, like really fucking laugh at this because she hasn't got a clue, she looks at me, anger clearly on her face at the fact that I'm laughing at her, from what I've learned people don't laugh at Campbell, fuck she takes herself way too seriously.

'You can't just fucking kiss me then ignore me like nothing happened!' I spit at her, pacing on my two feet, she's speechless 'Why are you looking so startled? Thought I'd forgot about it just because you clearly have?' she shakes her head, walking towards me but I stop her with my hand 'what, because you have some fucking authority over me you think you can just do what you like? How would you like it if I just...'

I finish my sentence by grabbing the collar of her shirt and crashing my lips against her, she's clearly shocked at first because she almost chokes when I wrestle my tongue through her lips, I push at her shoulders telling her to help me out, she gets what I'm trying to do when I feel her tongue massage mine, this is when I pull away smiling smugly at her

'See do you like it when I do that? Do you fucking-'

Her mouth is back on mine again, mutters a quiet shut the fuck up as she pushes me against the wall, hands roaming around my hips, pushing and pushing until there is actually no room left and my legs are left to wrap around her torso, I hold on to her with my arms around her shoulders, tongues clashing together again as I moan into her mouth, suddenly she's moving carrying me across the halls, clumsily since her mouth hasn't left mine yet, I groan when I feel her lightly start to suck at my bottom lip. She's a tease, a fucking tease so I bite back, switching the position of my mouth so it's moving away from her lips, along her jaw and up her neck 'fucking hell Emily' she whispers, grappling her hands into my hair, pushing my mouth harder against her neck as she lazily leans her head back, still leading us down the hall.

I groan again only this time in pain when my left elbow smashes against my cell door 'sorry' she mumbles against my lips giggling slightly as she pulls back kissing my cheek then dropping me down onto Effy's bunk, as I laugh with my aching lips, rubbing my elbow she straddles me from above, and then it hits me. I'm in my cell, I'm on Effy's bed, and Naomi is currently unbuttoning the collar button of her shirt with that glint in her eyes, and the first thought that enters my mind

I'm going to fuck the hot prison warden, isn't this like a fucking teenager's wet dream?

But how's she going to be tomorrow? What's going to happen when I fuck her good and proper and the sexual tension is completely out the way? I can't help thinking that I'm just convenient for whenever she's in work, she's bored and here I am Emily Fitch, starved from the human population and ready to fuck any girl as long as she gets some. As soon I feel warm hands sliding a couple of centimetres under my top all my worries fly right out of my head, everything in my mind focused on the flushed Naomi who's currently on top of me.

I leap up, kissing the smile of her face, as we proceed kissing each other's faces off, I snake both my hands behind her back, locking them together and pushing down until she collapsed on me, I gasp when our bodies come pressed together, oh and the bonus of this? We're going to fuck on Effy's bed, now that is what I consider a nice present. Snapping out for a minute leaves Naomi time for her hands to move even further up my top, not resting until my vest top is ripped over my head, from my body and thrown onto the small sink in the corner, she stops, arms lifting her up again until she's sitting down onto my legs and taking in my bra clad torso, I suppose this is the first time she's saw me without clothes on, well now it's my turn, starting with the already open button, I continue to open the buttons that follow it down Naomi's chest, with her eyes stalking my fingers as I do it, when reaching the button below her bra and popping it open, she's leaping forward again, mouth sucking gently on my neck while all I can do is lie back and enjoy it.

Whilst her blonde hair trickles down my neck as she continues lightly kissing it, my eyes catch the shiny silver button above the zip of her pencil skirt, I reach for it, my confidence boosting as my finger tips toy with it until it opens, I grab the zip but her hands catches mine suddenly, her kisses stopping and her face full of innocence coming up to face me, parts of her hair in her eyes

'Emily... I'm'

'Just kiss me' I say, already missing the taste of her mouth against mine if even only for a second, whatever is bothering her seems to fade as her mouth slowly lowers onto mine again, much more gentle kiss this time, less frantic than any other kiss we've ever had, feeling her body relax into mine I slowly move my hand down to her skirt, finding the zip and taking it step by step as I pull it down, the noise of it rippling through the cell, louder than our kisses, and louder than Naomi's moans, my hand grazes the top of her thigh through the exposed part of the zip being open and she freezes, 'I'm sorry' she whispers, her breath brushing against my neck as she suddenly sits up, looking around the room in panic and then down at me, I watch in complete and utter confusion as she bolts up from the bed, her black bra shown through the five buttons that have been undone on her shirt, usually tucked neat into her skirt but now recklessly falling below her hips, she retraces my steps, zipping her skirt back up and quickly doing the button, following it by clumsily buttoning up her top and looking back over to me 'I'm so sorry, I don't know why I'm doing this' she says, nervously running her hands through her hair 'I can't' she mutters and my heart breaks, scared, cold, lonely lying back on Effy's bed where she's left me to completely freak out, she fixes her black heels, 'sorry' she says again, eyes darting anywhere but me and then it registers, she's going to leave me.

I throw my head back to hit the pillows with a sigh, not really wanting to see her leave and try to apologise to me again, I hear her heels hitting the floor quickly, she's pacing whilst trying to fasten the collar button she didn't take a minute to think about ripping opening 5 minutes ago, and with that the cold air whips through the cell, I look up to see an empty room and if I wasn't so fucking angry with her, with myself then I'd probably be crying. A good ten minutes of me lying on the bed in completely silence must go by before its broken 'Emily?' My head snaps up at the voice from the other end of the cell, confused yet slightly amused look plastered across her face.

'Why are you half naked lying on my bed?' I begin to cry.

**

* * *

**

'I'm so stupid' I mutter through devouring a piece of chocolate in my mouth, surprisingly even though Friday our rooms got inspected Effy managed to keep the chocolate away from the guards, that was another rule... no food from visitors is allowed in cells, but right now I was grateful that she had it. We were still sat of Effy's bed, after she found me and I burst out sobbing she tried to comfort me with a hug, I pushed her away, half because I still wasn't talking to her but mostly because I couldn't bare anybody else touching me right now, so she backed off, climbing off her bed and walking over to the shelf, and just when I thought she gave up she turned back around, giant smile on her face and bar of chocolate in hand, I could of kissed her that second.

'I look so easy, Kiss me and I'll give you anything you want' I mock, ripping another piece of chocolate off the bar as she listens to me from the opposite side of her bed, I felt kind of bad eating this considering it was hers, but I was fucking angry, I hadn't had a good meal in a month and I felt like everything was just catching up on me. 'Nobody thinks that Emily' she says gently, probably trying not to send me off on another rant about how fucking terrible everything is 'no? But I feel like that!' I shout more to myself than her and she doesn't flinch, just smiles slight and that's when I realise this is the most I've probably talked to Effy in two weeks.

'This doesn't mean we're friends again...' I gesture between me and her on the bed, don't worry, before she even sat down she was over to the sink to hand me my discarded vest top back, so now I was fully covered again 'I'm just vulnerable at the minute, plus anyone would do anything for a piece of chocolate in here' I ensure her, hoping she's not getting her hopes up that we're just going to fall back into the comfortable friendship we once had, her lips turn again into a sad smile 'I didn't expect anything' she says quietly, I nod my head 'well good' I say, guilt obvious in my voice.

'I didn't use you' she says so quietly, that I barely hear her, it takes me a minute to register what she's said before I actually reply but she's right there again 'I respect you' she lifts her eyes from the sheets to meet mine and I look on in amazement, eyebrows scrunched up to the fullest.

'Respect?' I ask and she nods her head to confirm it, I laugh 'Funny way of showing it' she giggles gently, looking at me before she speaks 'were more alike then you know Emily' this makes me laugh even harder; shaking my head in disbelief at her 'except I actually haven't done anything wrong' I correct her.

'And you think you're the only person who hasn't?'

'oh because poisoning your boyfriends drink just screams innocence' I ridicule, she stands from the bed, walking over to the sink and resting her hands on it, her face leaning down 'you wouldn't understand' she whispers and I look at the back of her head confused

'Sounds simple to me'

'He raped me!' she suddenly bursts, springing her body round to face me with fury raging in her eyes, she laughs bitterly, pacing up and down the cell and all I can do is watch on in shock 'It all started off perfect of course, moving in together, promises of the future but then he got violent' she shakes her head as if trying to forget it 'he was going to do it again, and no one wanted to know, suddenly my brother disappears and my mum moves away and I'm left alone with him' she shaking now and I feel responsible for the sudden fear she feels 'I met Cook on the only night Adam would let me go out alone, and he believes me, me and Cook were strangers and he fucking believed me just like that'

'It's easier to fall in love when some cares isn't it?' she directs the question towards me, tears threatening to leave my eyes because I've never actually seen her like this before 'anyway, Adam found out, which left Cook in hospital and me alone with him again' she takes a deep breath, wiping her own tears that are now falling down her cheeks 'he was so angry I thought he was going to kill me and I couldn't escape, he made me feel like without him I would be nothing, lonely sole with no one who loves me'

'he beat me up for the rest of the week' she laughs sadly, suddenly cradling her ribs, which I'm guessing is her remembering how hurt she was when it happened 'we got invited to one of his work friends for dinner, of course he had me all dolled up as the perfect show girlfriend, clothes to cover my bruises up, promises of hurting me if I tried to let them know what was happening' I was sitting up on the bed now, soles of my feet on the floor as I listened to her carefully.

'When I went the bathroom they were all there, so many fucking pills that I felt like a kid in a candy store, I picked some different bottles, they were originally for me' she continues, and my eyes widen, suicide?

'when I got back downstairs I was alone in the kitchen with the other wife, she had her back turned and his drink was just there, whiskey' she recalls in hatred, then she smiles 'I didn't even think about it, I was popping the pills and throwing the powder straight into his drink, it had just about mixed in by time she'd turned around eyeing me suspiciously' she then claps her hands together strongly making me jump 'and as they say the rest is history, he collapsed during the salad, blood coming out of his nose. When they tested him and found the drugs the wife knew straight away what I had done in the kitchen when her back was turned, and here I am' she says, pinching at her clothes and I take a deep breath registering everything she has just told me.

'What...' I clear my throat 'what happened to him?' I know he didn't die, remembering the conversation me and Effy had on the first day of me being in here, she shrugs her shoulders 'Cooks alive and he loves me, that's all that matters' she states and I smile at her 'listen Eff, I didn't know-'

'Em, I didn't tell you that to guilt you into forgiving me, I told you because I respect you' she confirms again, walking over to her bed and sitting next to me 'Even my mum doesn't know the full story, not like she's fucking care' she spits before turning back to me 'I'm just asking you to give me a chance' she says sadly, reaching for my hand but this time I let her take it. 'Can you give me a chance please?' she looks on in anticipation, I bite my lip, thinking about all the possible things to say to her, I don't want to promise anything that might make her feel like we're suddenly alls forgiven.

'I can't promise anything' I smile lightly at her, but this seems to satisfy her when her long arms are wrapped around me, I take the comfort of resting my head on her shoulder for a couple of seconds 'and don't worry' she whispers in my ear 'it's not like you or Campbell are going anywhere anytime soon' my eyes widen.

* * *

'We made plates, things like statues you know? It was well wicked' Pandora was telling us about her latest piece of art that had came out of her Monday morning pottery classes, she was amazing seriously, definitely the comedian of the bunch even if she didn't know we mostly spent our time laughing at everything she'd say.

'Maybe we should use your plates, look at the state of these' Karen says, lifting up the dirty prison plates that have been set out in front of us 'You were the one washing them!' I accuse her and the table burst out laughing, she blushes. Karen coughs turning her attention back to Pandora 'tell us more about it then Panda?' she smiles when Pandora nods her head excitedly.

'well it was proper good, she said I had a natural talent for it' she says, shuffling her dinner into her mouth, Effy smirks at her, she wouldn't admit it but she's very protective over Pandora, she's almost like a child in this prison. It felt alright now, everything that had happened, Karen was more than joyous that I was trying to get along with Effy more now, and Pandora didn't even notice the difference. Effy had told Karen all about yesterday, with my permission of course and now they were making it there personal job not to mention the N word around me, I thought it was kind of cute, I hadn't seen her since she left me alone in my cell yesterday.

'Gov Campbell was in there' she says, I scoff automatically, 'prick' I say under my breath, this isn't missed by Effy who sends me a knowing smile, Pandora pokes disgustedly at the vegetables on her plate whilst continuing 'lesson got cut short though, because he started arguing with Miss Campbell' I choke on my water, Karen's eyes snap to mine immediately 'Naomi?' I breathe out and Pandora nods, seemingly unaware of how uncomfortable the table has just become for me.

'What were they arguing about?' Karen asks, she looks up thoughtful for a second 'dunno' she mutters, slurping now on the small bit of ice cream they've supplied, I deflate really wanting to know what it was all about, she slams her spoon down smiling 'I remember!' she perks up 'she asked him to move her to a different sector of the prison, and then they just started arguing' My hear t stops, I look over at hr confused and I feel Karen's hand gently rest of my knee, sad eyes looking over at me 'well at least it means we won't see Campbell anymore now, Not that it bothers me because I'm out of here soon...' Pandora concludes and I feel sick.

I suddenly bolt up from my seat, hands grabbing so hard at my dinner tray it's probably going to snap, I make the three of the jump, Karen reaches for me 'Em...' she says and I shush her with my hand 'Just leave it, I'm going back to my cell, I don't feel well' I say, walking away from them.

'Maybe she ate some of that yellow stuff, it looked well funky' Pandora's comment is the last thing I hear before I'm throwing my tray into the cleaning trolley and making a b line for the canteen door, not before taking a look over to the officers table to see that Naomi actually wasn't there and my chest tightens, has she gone?

She wanted to move because of me.


	10. Chapter 10

**Just a little chapter till the real drama starts (good drama that is) ;)**

**Enjoy! **

'Come on Em, it's been four days! Come out for a bit...'

Things were getting too much, I had been wrapped up in my musky grey blanket for four days now, just leaving enough of a gap in it for me to actually breathe whilst the rest of the blanket was covering most of my face, lying with my arms squeezed around my knees up to my torso. I was sick, and I was upset, and I felt so fucking stupid for actually thinking she probably cared about me. Officers don't care, I was warned numerous times but I was just too fucking stupid to listen. The officers had the nurse into see me, which resulted in her giving me medical excuse from participating in prison duties this week, I'd call that a bonus for not actually having anything wrong with me.

I groan in response, pulling the covers a little tighter around my body and shuffling closer to the wall, I hear them all sigh, almost like a choir, the girls had been trying to get me up all week, Pandora was still under the impression that I was actually sick and well Effy was still being Effy with her appreciated silences when I needed it, and Karen was being a little nagging fucking bitch... I suppose she just cares.

I hear her whisper something, making panda and Effy leave the room, I wait for her to start talking because it's kind of an awkward silence with her just staring at my body under the blanket, suddenly it's ripped away from me, the material once in the grip of my fingers is now flying through the air, and to the left of me standing on the bunk ladder is a determined Karen narrowing her eyes at me 'Karen, why the fuck did you do that?' I shout at her, unwrapping my arms from my body, trying to reach the blanket that has caught onto the steel of the bunk, she rips it off so it falls to the floor

'Listen to me Emily Fitch' she demands, full name and all 'You're going to get up, and you're going to come and fucking socialise with us' she clears her throat 'without being in a cell' she waves her hands around the small room, I roll my eyes, turning my body away from her to face the wall again 'I don't feel like'

My body is tugged backwards, body rolling over so that I come face to face with her 'have you ever been dumped before?' she shouts, not being horrible but more like a fucking army major, I swallow feeling a little scared of her at the moment 'Yes, I...' she cuts me off

'And what did you do? Go home, crawl under your pink Barbie sheets and cry like a little girl?' I shake my head at this, her arm still attached to mine to keep me from rolling over 'No' I whisper barely audible and she nods, 'then what did you do?'

'Karen...' I say, she grips harder 'tell me what you did Emily' she demands, 'I got over it!' I yell in her face, instead of knocking me out she grins, big massive fucking grin and let's go of my arm to smooth her hand over it gently 'and that's what you're going to do' she says, more lightly now instead of the angry force that took over her just a second ago, I agree nodding my head at her because she's right, I'm acting slightly pathetic but still, I'm hurt.

'Now you're going to get up, and come out there with me like the fierce red head you are' I giggle at this which makes her smile even more, her smile drops slightly, serious expression entering her face 'because it's not like you were together anyway, like I told you when I first met you, nobodies getting in them knickers' she says sadly, smoothing my hair over with her fingers when she see's my sullen reaction 'she's just a plain bitch, end of' she finishes, smiling again sadly at me, as I shake my head to protest

'But she's been really nice to me, well sometimes...'

'That's how twats usually start' she says, and that's when it goes silent, me looking back to the ceiling and her comforting me with her kind touches, 'she won't get away with it though, when I get out of here I'll set her car on fire or something' she states so serious that my tired body shoots up from the bed, just to catch the smirk on her face 'Joking!' she states, holding her hands up in defence 'convicts can tell jokes too you know?' she says smiling, I burst out laughing, making her chuckle along with me 'stop hiding please' she says, smiling down at me 'because I still love you' she says, in a cute little voice that I can't help it when my body automatically pushes her into a giant hug.

'Fine' I mutter into her shoulder, we hug for a couple more minutes, I'm just enjoying the silence and being close to someone who I'm sure doesn't want to fuck me over, the friendship moment is ruined by a flushed face Effy, bursting through the cell out of breath... from laughter.

'You have...' she takes a deep breath, bending over to catch her breath '...to come and see this' me and Karen look up at her confused, she rolls her eyes 'Pandora's trying to eat her weight in ice cream' she confirms, Karen raises her eyebrow at me, asking me if we should check it out and I nod excitedly, seriously this is the only entertainment we ever get in this place, we'd be silly to miss it. She took my hand, lacing our fingers together before smiling at me; we stayed like that walking through the halls reaching the canteen which was bursting with loud cheers and mostly laughter. This was the first time I'd really been this far out of my cell since in a while, but surprisingly I wasn't thinking about her this time.

'That's impossible' came one of the inmates disbelieved voice as we entered the canteen, girls gathered round one of the tables, more shockingly the guards seemed to be amused about what was going on as well. We pushed our way through the cheering girls to reach the main attraction, Pandora, two tubs of ice creams, two spoons, two hands, one mouth, and it was fucking hilarious. Karen burst out laughing at her straight away, chocolate dribbling down her chin as she continued to stuff herself with the dessert.

'bet your happy you didn't miss this' Karen whispers in my ear and I giggle turning around 'she's so random' I comment turning back around the witness the phenomena which is Pandora 'Not really' Karen says casually 'she's just the distraction' I turn my head, looking at her confused 'distraction?' I ask over all the raised voices and she nods her head 'Yeah' she nods to the kitchen 'she distracts the guards' she confirms as I continue to look over in the kitchen, inmates taking the luxury items from friends and family that are taken away from us to be put in the group fridge, and then looking at the guards who haven't noticed a thing.

'That's fucking clever' I say, watching Pandora suddenly stop eating and keel over on the table, face turning a slightly different shade to her usual colour 'I bet she pukes' I say, not getting a response from Karen, I nudge her slightly and when she still doesn't answer I turn around and face her 'Karen, reckon she'll puke?' she's not looking at me, she's not even looking at Pandora, I follow her eye sight and my skin goes cold.

'Emily? I heard you where sick and...' I hear Pandora vomit behind me, and the crowd of inmates make disgusting noises, mostly scattering away from the now Ill Pandora as one of the guards takes her out, I can't help what happens next, call it a sudden reaction.

Without noticing my knuckles where actually clenched I strike the blonde standing in front of me across the face, hand hurting as it connects with her cheek as she stumbles back on her feet in shock and I'm grabbed straight away by another officer, shouting in my ear as all the inmates now surround me, laughter, cheering, shock all colliding in one around me. The Naomi now clenching at her cheek is lost in the crowd of inmates, I'm pushed out of the canteen, officer holding me by the straight of my vest top.

**

* * *

**

I wasn't sorry, I wasn't even guilty for hitting her, the only thing running through my mind was how long they were going to keep me for, they didn't put me in isolation this time, which was surprising really because what I had just done was probably worse than threatening Jenny over a plastic fucking table. I was in a normal room now, kind of looked like a class room and I felt like I was back in a school detention.

'You know that was technically assault' the quiet fades when Officer Thomas who has been assigned to watch me from the front starts to talk, he sucks the air through his teeth 'but assault on an officer' he shakes his head at me, I roll my eyes sarcastically at him 'I don't care' I say, leaning my head back down on the table as he starts to laugh gently

'That's the problem with you girls, you just don't care' he mocks, and I sigh

'She deserved it' I say, not moving my head that are currently cradled in my arms on the table, he doesn't answer and it goes silent, just the creak of his chair every time he leans back or forth.

'Yeah, she is a bit of a wanker' he says casually, surprising me completely when my head snaps up from the table to meet his amused eyes, I'm about to agree when the door jolts open.

'I'll remember that when my dad's paying your wages next week shall I?' she says coldly. His face drops with fear of her standing in the door, she points her thumb to the now open door and he gets up scraping the chair whilst doing it 'go on your break, this_ wanker_ will take over' she spits at him, 'yeah Miss' He mutters, boots bolting across the floor until the door is slammed shut again, I immediately put my head back in between my arms on the desk, I hear the leather of the office chair crack as she takes a seat.

Complete silence.

'So, I'm guessing you used to write articles for some kind of boxing club, and in return they gave you lessons, because that Em, was fucking impressive' she jokes, her voice hurts my ears, I don't lift my head to answer her 'Go away, Please' I barley mutter into my arm, my voice travelling around the room, until I hear the legs of the chair creak again, me automatically knowing she's got up.

'I'm sorry okay? Leaving you like that was wrong, I tried to find you to apologise but-'

'Don't lie!' I lift my head up to spit at her 'stop fucking lying to me, you pissed off for four days, that's what you did!' she shakes her head at me, 'you've got it wrong' she says, I scoff, facing away from her 'You tried to have sex with me, then ran away when it got to real for you' I say quietly, she sighs 'Emily, I got suspended'

I look at her confused 'suspended?' I repeat and she nods her head slowly 'Yeah, had an argument with Dad' she rolls her eyes 'He wanted to move Jones back to this sector, anyway I called him a cunt and he suspended me'

'What?' I ask in disbelief

'I know, don't worry though she's not going anywhere'

'No, I mean... I thought you wanted to move sectors?' I reply, still confused, Oh Pandora, if she wasn't so friendly and nice I'd probably kill her for having the ability to read things completely wrong. She starts laughing gently 'why would I want to do that when you're here?' she whispers, biting her bottom lip before trying her chances of cupping my cheek in her hand, I flinch away.

'Naomi,' I close my eyes, shaking my head at her 'stop' I say, my voice breaking, but she continues anyway, rubbing my cheek with her smooth fingers, my eyes opening when she traces over my lips with the tips of them 'I was scared' she says, looking deep into my eyes whilst she gets me to understand 'It got really intimate' she swallows 'and it scared me how much I was attracted to you'

My breath hitches, this couldn't mean, she doesn't 'I like you Emily' she whispers, not meeting my eyes 'I like you alot' it goes silent then, she likes me, I knew it! She fucking likes me. She seems nervous now, eyes glued to the floor,

'I like you too' I simply reply, she smiles, squeezing my cheek gently.

It goes silent again then, and that's when I notice we're both too embarrassed to actually talk now that we've both admitted we like each other, I look around for anything to say, mention something Emily Jesus, a good looking girl likes you and suddenly you don't have anything to say anymore.

'I went to see my mum in Bristol; you live in Bristol don't you?' I smile. Mostly at the fact that she knows I live in Bristol and I've never actually told her this, but also because she's never mentioned her mum to me before, half because she's cute when trying to make conversation as well, I simply nod.

'You've never mentioned your mum before' I say quietly, because why would she mention her mum to you? God, she looks up eyebrow raised 'I haven't?' she shrugs.

'I'm just trying to get to know her again' she says quietly, I look up at her confused until she elaborates 'My parents broke up when I was 5 so...' she clears he throat 'my dad took me to London with him' I see this is a sensitive thing for her to be talking about, since her nails have suddenly started scratching away at the paint work of the desk, I start gentle

'So what's she like... your mum?' She smiles at this.

'A lovely caring woman, who'd do anything for me' I smile now, she starts to frown 'or if you ask my dad, an immature hippy bitch who couldn't take care of herself, let alone a child'

'Prick' I mutter again without realising, she raises a amused eyebrow at me, I begin to blush again 'did you know...' she states, leaning back in her chair a little with a sad smile 'My grandad was a officer, and his dad was an officer, so therefore I must keep the tradition going' she mocks, waving her hands slightly, I swallow, shaking my head 'no, you can do whatever you like' I state she blushes, hesitant to say something but stopping, starting again 'Next time Emily, I won't leave you alone' my eyes widen,

Oh so there's going to be a next time?

**

* * *

**

'Assaulting an officer Emily? Seriously, since when did you become butch dyke with a fucking fist of steel, I'm trying to get you out of here and all you can fucking do is go around spoiling it, you know if mum knew about this she'd go fucking mental...'

I had the phone loosely handing away from my ear as Katie went into her latest rant, there was a positive about her being on my call time this week though, the fact that she couldn't leap over and hit me for being such a twat.

'... You promised you wouldn't get in trouble, what's going to happen now? The next time I see you you'll be covered in tattoos and fucking piecing, that's what...'

I'd spotted her about ten minutes ago, me looking through the glass of the prisons visitors nursery like a paedophile as she monitored the inmates who had children visits today, I was half listening to Katie's telling off but half watching Naomi's face light up when a baby would start laughing as soon as it was put into its mothers arms.

'... Do you think it's cool? God it's so not, what did dad tell you about keeping your head down? Emily? Are you even fucking listening to me...?'

'Yeah!' I defended myself, but no Katie, I'm not listening to you, I'm watching Naomi be Naomi and not some fake make believe pretend, Miss Campbell wouldn't smile at the children like that, Miss Campbell definitely wouldn't help the mothers as they were trying to calm there crying baby down.

'Good! So come on then, what the fuck was you thinking! Why did you punch her?'

Naomi suddenly turns around as if she sensed my eyes on her all along, face breaking out into a huge smile when she sees me, shy wave thrown my way as I easily return it, her attention is elsewhere then as cry screeches through the nursery and she's on it straight away, my heart swells.

'Because I think I love her'


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11!**

**Please read, please review to tell me what you love/hated.**

**they're all appreciated!**

I dropped the phone in surprise, mental cord swinging until the receiver hits the cold hard walls leaving the smashing sound to linger around the halls. I was surprised, shocked even and not even at the fact that Katie was now frantically shouting down the phone that was hanging loose from the box on the wall, but at the fact that those little words even left my mouth without any warning at all. I'm stood in the hall looking in to space trying to register what I've just admitted, not just to Katie but also admitted to myself when I divert my eyesight back to the nursery and there's Naomi, small wriggling child in arms but her attention completely on me through the clear pain of glass blocking us from each other, she looks concerned, one hand smoothing down the babies hair, trying to calm him but all the time her eyes not leaving mine. I suppose me standing in the middle of the hall looking completely terrified after dropping the phone is enough to make anybody look concerned. Before I know I've been staring too long she's beckoning the mother over with her hands, smiling as they exchange the little blue blanket covering the baby between them, before the mum nods at something Naomi's telling her and she's heading for the door, I freeze.

Katie's still chanting away, her piercing voice pouring out the phone that's still discarded hanging down against the wall, the nursery door opens casting more light into the halls, the occupant I'm guessing to be Naomi coming out, I panic looking between the phone and the half opened door, turning my back away from the door I receive the phone, cautiously lifting it to my ear, it's silent.

'Katie?' I breath down the phone, nursery door how squeaking shut, noisy heels travelling down the hall.

'Oh so you are fucking listening?' I role my eyes thinking that she might of actually given up and put the phone down already 'what the fuck was all that about? Love, how can you love her!' she shouts, and I cringe at the fact that Naomi might hear what she's saying because she's that loud, the footsteps get heavier and I start to panic more, I do the only thing I can think of at this exact time.

'What's that Katie, I love you too' I reply to her, she goes silent for a second.

'What? Have you gone fucking deaf? I said how can you love her?' she spits again, the tap of the heels nearly behind me now; I squeeze the phone tight in my finger tips.

'Don't start crying' I say, trying to add as much emotion to my voice as possible

'What the fuck are you on about? I'm not crying, but if I was I'd probably be crying at how hilarious it is that you think you love your-'

'Katie, I'm going to have to go or you'll set me off too'

'Emily you better not fucking put this phone down, I swear if you put it down-'

'Miss and love you too, bye' I slam the phone down now, taking a deep breath and knowing Naomi is standing behind me, she probably doesn't know that I know she's there, I turn around slowly to be met with her amused eyes, leaning against the wall again.

'My twin' I say rolling my eyes 'she gets a tad bit too emotional' I laugh nervously and a small smile grazes her lips, with that I begin to walk away, moving my body around hers and heading back to my cell, I can't stand to be near her right now, I'm so confused and it feels like my hearts about to explode, it nearly does when I feel her hand on my shoulder.

'Emily, are you okay?' I flinch away from her touch, turning around shyly to meet her now returned to concerned eyes from before, I nod lightly sending her a small smile aswell, she frowns 'it's just, you're acting...' she stops, raises her eyebrows 'jumpy' she concludes looking at me suspiciously, and I completely agree with her, I'm acting like a total cracked twat right now but I can barely look at her in the eyes not trusting my mouth to blurt out the words like I just did to Katie.

'Yeah' I breath out, swallowing and nodding my head at her 'I'm just still feeling a bit sick' she only looks more concerned now, suddenly raises her hand to rest on my forehead and I can't help but snort out the laughter that is at the back of my throat, mainly because this was something my mum would do to me and Katie to see if we had the flu, her facial expression doesn't change though, her hand still pressed against my head, tongue resting on her lips as she stays focused on what she's doing.

'Yeah, you seem a little hot' she blushes slightly when saying this, _fuck me you are hot _is the initial response in my head, she releases her hands to fall back to her sides, I'm spaced out she clears her throat. 'Maybe I should walk you back to your cell' she says, 'in case you, you know collapse or something' I nod lazily at her, and then it hits me.

'Oh no it's fine, you're busy so...' Effy won't be in the cell when we get back, her boyfriends back to visit her today meaning that when we get back me and Naomi would be in a cell alone, at least now I have the sound of crying baby and concerned mothers distracting the intense moments me and her have, but being in a cell alone, no noise and nowhere to get space away from each other? I probably would collapse. I nod to the nursery where she was moments ago, she shakes her head.

'Actually I clocked off about half a hour ago, so I'm not busy' she smiles, and I instantly send one back when I realise that Naomi didn't even have to really be in the nursery, bet she was in there for all those cute little babies, adorable and fucking priceless, but shit think Emily.

'Then you should go home, probably got better things to be doing then hanging round a prison all day' I reply back with a little laughter, walking slightly past her until her arm lifts to the wall, just before my face and she sighs.

'Emily, will you please just let me walk you to your cell?' she laughs, I just agree not having any more excuses for her not to walk me back, it's a quiet walk through the halls, every now and then our hands would brush together but neither one of us brave enough to grasp at them. She opens the cell door, I send her a smile as I walk through and over to the table where the letters from home are

'Well I guess I'll see you...' Hands are slipped around my waist, not noticing that the cell door as already been shut before I even realised. Her hot lips connect with my neck from behind, I knew this would happen, fucking knew it but I can't enjoy it, being so fucking confused as I am. She continues to kiss my neck, occasional finding points she seems to like more than others as she sucks on them.

'You look beautiful today' she says through her kisses, muttering it into my neck, I giggle.

'I looked exactly the same yesterday' I point out, her laughing as her breath tickles my neck.

'well, I think you look beautiful everyday' she whispers, still kissing her trails along my neck as my heart begins to beat faster, good job she can't see my face because my eyes are clenched together as she hands start to roam above my torso, rubbing it gently over my vest top.

I laugh again, taking a deep breath 'it must be my sexy prison attire turning you on, prisons rubbing off on you Naoms' I joke, she only kisses harder at the mention of the new nick name I've suddenly come out with, the suppressed moan now comes out fully, echoing off the walls of the small room

'could be your clothes...' she says, peppering small kisses around my jaw now, 'or your hair' she twirls a piece in her fingers, reaching across to leave a light kiss on it 'your lips' she says, suddenly I'm span around in her arms, lips lightly touching mine before she's taking them away again, eyes burning into mine as she continues 'or your body' her hands snake up my torso, fully grabbing at my tits above the vest top, I jump slightly at the force of her hands as she leans forward again, now kissing down my neck, oh god this has to stop.

'Shit Naomi, what times it?' she ignores me first, continuing to enjoy the taste of my neck, not going to lie the feel of her lips on my neck is amazing, but I just can't be doing this right now, I tap her back lightly and she groans, pulling her face away to strength her limbs, taking her hand gently off my breast where it's been laying comfortably and looking at the watch on her wrists.

'Nearly 8' she says, before reaching forward and gently kissing me on the lips.

'Effy will be back soon then' I murmur, the latest a visitor can come and visit to is 8 o'clock so I'm not lying when I say Effy will be back soon 'and I think she'll be a bit suspicious if she catches us like this' I giggle, she groans pulling her lips away from mine.

'Guess I better leave then' she pouts, stroking her fingers up and down my jaw, leaning in briefly to give me one last kiss before letting go of my body 'I'll see you tomorrow, come and find me yeah?' she says, smiling as I nod and she walks over to the cell door, but before she's even touched it, it's opening, revealing a happy looking Effy, even more happy when she see's who in the cell with me, Naomi clears her throat turning around to me.

'Your next surprise cell check will be soon, so next time have the place a little tidier okay?' she says in the Miss Campbell tone she used to use with me, before turning around, giving Effy a small nod and leaving the cell, I laugh automatically at the fact Effy already knows what's going on between me and her.

She walks over to her bunk, dropping down on it, hand under head on her pillow 'oh and what was she checking for? How many fingers she can fit up your-'

'Effy!' I shout laughing; she rolls her eyes with a smirk.

'Sorry but didn't you like punch her lights out this morning?'

'Well yeah,' I start off, awkwardly trying to answer her question, she raises an eyebrow at me 'Sorry, I'm weak okay!' she starts laughing, shaking her head. It goes silent then, just the thoughts of today floating around in our minds.

'Cook asked me to marry him' my head shoots to her, blazing smile across my face.

'And?' I ask excited and she starts to chuckle.

'I said no.' I narrow my eyes at her in confusion

'But I thought you loved him?'

'I do, I do!' she protests, sitting up in her sheets 'but I'm way too young and I think he was pissed anyway' I laugh along with her now, even though I'm still confused.

'Then why are you so happy?' she smiles now, more of a private smile to herself.

'Because it's nice to know he's at least thought about it' I nod my head in understanding

'Oh and am I fuck getting hitched in a jail' she finishes with a smirk, I laugh loud.

* * *

'So I'm guessing the prison phone suddenly lost connection or something yesterday?' Katie smirks down at me, dropping her fake pink Gucci bag that always takes hours to be checked by the guards on the floor and lazily falling into her seat, I smile.

'Katie, sorry it's just...'

'Leave it yeah Em's, we can save the talk about the blossoming romance with your babysitter for another time' she looks nervous, I want to ask why but then she looks up from her hands smiling slightly.

'I've brought someone to see you' she says quietly, I smirk trying to lighten the mood

'You haven't brought Jenny have you? Because these fists have been getting me into enough trouble lately' she laughs, leaping over and smacking me on the arm gently

'One, that isn't funny, and two if I ever see that bitch again she won't have any fucking legs' she says, hitting her hands against the table, I smile.

'Go on then, who's the mystery guest? I swear if you've brought James then-'

'Hello Emily' I freeze, eyes slowly leaving Katie's nervous ones and meeting the woman's I've been dreaming of for months now.

'Mum?' My voice comes out shaky, Katie stands up, squeezing my hand in hers

'I'll leave you two alone for a while' she says, I smile at her as she picks her bag up and walks back outside, I look back up at mum's standing body but she doesn't smile, she's not even looking at me, she's looking around at the other inmates with disgust.

'Mum, sit down' I say, her eyes snap down to mine for a second before she looks away, folding her arm tighter around herself

'I'm not staying long' she sounds like she warning me more than anything else, slowly dragging the metal chair back, and staring carefully at the seat before she actually sits down, resting her hands under the table so I can't even reach out and touch them, it goes silent then, awkward silent.

'How're you?' I ask she shrugs her shoulders, still not looking at me but just around the place with her nose lifted up about everything.

'I'm good, just trying to keep everything as normal as possible, I don't see why this should affect Katie and James aswell' she finishes eyeing one of the girls covered in tattoo's repulsed, I sigh.

'So everything's alright at home then?'

'Quieter' she says, nervously itching her arms 'but I suppose it isn't all that bad, James isn't constantly arguing around the house anymore, so more of his homework is done' she answers casually, I'm still pissed that she won't look at me in the eyes.

'I suppose me being in here is an all around bonus then' I joke, laughing lightly but she still doesn't respond, picking at her fingers nails now.

'Can you even look me in the eyes anymore?' she doesn't answer, her eyes briefly snapping up to mine and the emotion in them, my heart breaks.

'I better go...' she gets up, I reach forward in a panic grabbing her arm.

'No, don't go, stay for a while with me please' I beg her, she pulls her arm away from my grasp, smoothing her hands down her skirt to rid the imaginary dirt she seems to be finding a lot of lately.

'I don't know when I'll next be back, I'm busy and...'

'Mum,'

'Katie will be in though; she seems to like it here for some reason'

I reach out for her again; she raises her hand at me 'Emily, Don't' she says sternly to me and now it's my turn to look at her in disgust.

'Don't bother' she looks down at me confused and I continue 'don't bother trying to come back, I don't want to fucking see you' I take a deep breath, standing out of my chair and pushing it back under the table 'You haven't even asked me how I am!' I shout at her in disbelief 'I'm sick of pining for your love, I can't do it anymore' my voice breaks then, and I turn my back to her walking away, looking for the one person I need right now.

'Emily' I hear my mum shout sadly, but I ignore her, looking around the room, finally spotting him in the corner, small hand held radio between his fingers, one earphone in probably listening to football or some shit when he's not meant to, Officer Thomas.

'I need you to take me to Miss Campbell's office' I demand, standing in front of him as he sits, he looks up confused, pulling the earphone out of his ear then shaking his head at me.

'I'm on duty' he says, going to push the earphone back in but I stop him with my hands, he's shit scared of Naomi, only reason I'm asking him really because I know no one else would do it, and I need her right now.

'But she told me to ask you to take me straight after here, so she'll probably be pretty mad if you don't' I lie to him, he freezes instantly, stuffing the radio back into his trousers and pulling himself up from the seat.

He takes me down to her office, through the horrible halls until I'm standing outside the familiar door, he stands awkwardly outside for a couple of seconds, until I turn to him 'You can go if you want, she's expecting me' I lie again, but he looks grateful at the fact he doesn't even have to see Naomi, with a frantic head nod he's back down the way we came in, faster than I've probably ever seen him walk in my life, I take a deep breath, pushing the handle on the door down.

She's in there, sitting at her desk on her office chair, laptop on the table in front of her, eyes slowly glancing up to see the person that's just entered her room, fortunately for me a smile breaks out of her face, she closes her laptop over and beckons me to come in further with her hands.

'Hey, thanks for knocking' she jokes, I turn around, slamming the door shut and locking it slowly, before turning back around and smiling at her 'You alright?' she smiles back, amusement in her eyes also I nod, before I narrow my eyes on hers.

'I want you to fuck me'

Her eyes nearly pop out of her head, eyebrows rocketing off her face 'what?' she squeaks out, I smile, reaching the bottom of my vest top, toying with it before in one pull it's gone from my body, thrown to the corner of the room and I'm making my way over to her.

'You heard me, I want you to take me, right now' I repeat slowly, walking over to her, she leans back on her office chair, the leather creasing as she does so, as I get closer to her she seems nervous

'Emily...' she says shakily, I reach her, jumping up on her knees straight away, she wraps her arms around my waist making sure I don't fall, I try to kiss her but she moves her face away, hand on my chin pulling it until I face her

'What's brought all this on?' she says gently, smoothing her hand across my jaw again.

'Nothing,' I protest, shaking my head at her 'I just want to have sex with you, must there be a reason?' I lean in, kissing her lips gently, I grab one of her hands from my waist, slowly moving it until it reaches the front of the band of my pants, she starts to move her hand gently on my torso, stroking her finger tips up and down it, when I try and push her hands lower she pulls away, laying her hands gently on my shoulders.

I sigh in frustration 'why won't you just fuck me?'

'Because something's wrong, and I'd rather we talk about it then us trying to shag it away'

She's right, my fucking mum's trapped anger is making me force Naomi into something she clearly doesn't want to do right now, it's her fault, fucking Jenna always her fucking fault. I rest my head on Naomi's shoulders, breathing deeply as she rakes her hands through my hair, I begin to cry.

'It's alright' she smoothes 'it's alright' she repeats again as I sob into her shoulder.

'She hates me' I cry 'she fucking hates me' I repeat

'Who?' she asks gently,

'My mum' I mutter into her neck and she sighs, kissing my naked exposed shoulder and she rubs her hands up and down my back 'she couldn't even look at me' I weep, rubbing my hands hard over my eyes to stop the tears falling from them 'I feel so alone Naomi'

'You've got me' she whispers, hands still rubbing lightly against my shoulder blades, I smile into her neck, lightly laughing as well at this situation we've found our self in, everything's just so... complicated.

I pull back, smiling slightly, caressing my finger tips down her cheek 'Naomi, I'm in prison... probably going to be for a long time' she must see where this conversation is going, she leans over lightly brushing her lips against mine 'I don't care' she mutters into the kiss

'I just don't care'


	12. Chapter 12

**Hi everyone! first of all sorry I havnt updated in a while, I've been so uninspired latley it's horrible. I've started this chapter like 5 times rewritting and rewritting so I hope it's okay.**

**Hmm, new skins cast revealed this week, really don't know how to feel about that!**

**Anyway, Read, Review, Enjoy!**

The next three weeks seemed to fly by after the night in Naomi's office. Things felt better now and I really didn't understand it because things definitely weren't perfect for me. Three weeks ago I told my mother not to come and visit me again and that's exactly what she did, but it's not like I cared anymore. I just didn't need people like her around me. Katie continued to visit, always trying to apologise for the selfish bitch, telling me that she's also going through a rough time but I just dismissed it, telling her I didn't want to talk about it and that's how it had been for the last couple of weeks, always talking about anything else except _her_. Drama was forgotten where I was right now, me and Naomi laying side by side on her office floor, hands linking in-between us. She was the other reason for the emotional roller coast I had been going through and judging by the last couple of weeks I'd probably been the happiest that I had ever been in this fucking place. We'd always find each other somehow even if it wasn't planned. Laughing, talking, kissing, a lot of fucking frantic kisses in places where nobody else would be, mainly in her office but sometimes in my cell when Effy wasn't about and one time in the staff toilets when I cut my hand in the canteen and she just happened to be around to help me clean up my wound. I was caught a little off guard a couple of hours ago when she suddenly pulled away from our passionate in brace to go and route through her desk only to be wickedly smiling seconds later when she produced the clear bottle of vodka from draw in triumphant. Promises of only having one small sip each turned into us passing the bottle between us and then the empty bottle being thrown aside as we began to sloppily make out with each other again, falling to the floor halfway through in giggles. It went silent then, me moving to lay my head on top of her as her fingers lazily drifted through parts of my hair, we weren't drunk but we weren't exactly how an inmate and police officer should be either.

My eyes catch the empty bottle resting on the floor right next to Naomi's legs and I start to laugh again, muffled into her chest and making her shirt vibrate in ripples slightly 'Vodka in your desk officer?' I say teasingly, moving my face to look up slightly meeting her amused expression 'that's not very professional of you is it?' she laughs.

Tickling my sides slightly with her now roaming fingers 'it's actually not mine' she says, stopping her hand but continuing to leave her eyes on mine 'I confiscated it from one of the inmates, not like she's going to ask for it back anytime soon' I giggle, hugging my arms tighter around her torso as the cold hard floor starts to get more uncomfortable by the second, not that I'd admit it though because this is probably the closest I've ever been to her.

'Romantic' I say raising my eyebrow at her and she starts laughing again, I groan as the cold floor catches the part of my skin that isn't covered by my vest or trousers and she looks at me concerned. I untangle my arms from around her, attempting to sit up which is a little bit of a difficult task for a second, finally springing up I grab my now spinning head 'I haven't drank in months, I think maybe it's went to my head a bit' I shyly whisper, palms clutching both sides of my temple.

She steadies her hand on my shoulder, pulling her weight on me to sit up next to me, feeling her rubbing soothing circles on my back with her hand 'No, no you're fine' she ensures me, letting me rest my head on her shoulder. She reaches forward grabbing the glass bottle in her hands and scanning over the label with her eyes 'Actually it was a little strong, looks a bit foreign too' she giggles, because I didn't drink half of the bottle alone now. I feel myself dosing off slightly on the comfort of her shoulder, after a while she shakes my shoulders gently 'fuck, we could be poisoned or something' she says worriedly wrapping her arm around me 'I'm so stupid, god you could be ill, I could lose my fucking job' she continues like this for a while, tipsy and going through the possibilities that could of came out of us drinking that bottle, this is until I begin to laugh and she shuts up.

'God Naoms calm down' I turn around, her incredulous face looking at me to continue, her now messy hair falling around her face as she tugs on her bottom lips with her teeth, smudged lip gloss and messy shirt collar making her look rather appealing right now 'I'm not ill, I'm not going to die, I just feel like...' she continues to stare at me as my eyes burn into hers, she looks confused for a second as the smirk starts to grow on my lips and my arms wrap around her neck 'I feel like kissing you' she doesn't get a chance to react because I'm on her straight away, pushing her shoulders back down to the floor with my strong lips connecting to hers, she squeaks from the coldness of the ground hitting her thin covered back, I pull back when her tongue connects with mine. I'm not trying to take this any further because frankly I don't want us to fuck just because we felt a bit happy at the time. I'm still straddling her to the floor my thoughts suddenly turning serious as I continue to look into her lust filled eyes.

'Do you think...?' I start, hiccupping slightly before I continue 'Do you do this because it's in your job that we're together all the time or because you want us to be together?' I whisper slightly, eyes falling to small gold buckle of Naomi's belt; I feel her take a deep breath.

'Where did that come from?' she laughs nervously, not actually answering my question which I note straight away.

'Nowhere it's just' I timidly raise my eyes to her awaiting anxious ones 'You probably wouldn't look at me twice on the outside world' I mutter, she sighs rocking her hips slightly for me to roll off her, we lay side by side then, the silent drowning around us until I feel her hand slide into mine.

'Emily, that isn't true' she speaks softly.

'Really?' I fire back at her and she turns onto her side, resting her body weight on her left arm as she narrows her eyes at me.

'Yes!' she defends herself, tugging our linked hands for me to look at her. I oblige rolling to my side, smiling slightly at the linked hands resting in the middle of us 'you're so beautiful, I've always thought you were so beautiful' she admits sheepishly, I continue to look down at our hands in adoration 'when I first saw you,' she laughs to herself now and I take my attention away from the hands to focus fully on her 'I actually couldn't believe you could be in a place like this, I mean you look so... pure' I choke back a laughter as the blush increases on her face.

'So I found out your name and checked your files' she says guilty, so that's what you were doing on the first day then. 'I read it over a couple of times and that's when I saw that you know'

'Stabbed a girl within an inch of her life for no reason at all?' I conclude, shutting my eyes. She doesn't answer but the hold on my hand gets tighter.

'I'm not using you Emily' she whispers, making my eyes shoot open because really that's all I needed to hear from her right now, I smile which she gladly returns before leaning in to peck my lips softly, I sigh in content before those feeling from weeks ago come running back into my head and I just don't think I'm strong enough to hold them in anymore.

'Well good' I say, nervously 'because I need to tell you sometime' _I think I'm in love with you._

'go for it' she smiles casually, unlinking our hands to push my overgrown fringe from out of my eyes, I shiver as she hands brushes gently against my cheek when she's moving them back down. What are you doing Emily? You can't ruin it.

'I can't' I blurt out, shutting my eyes and silently cursing myself, she laughs again.

'You need to tell me something but you can't?' she sounds amused, giggling a little when she finishes her question I sigh frustrated, you can't just tell someone you've been having a slight fling with for a month that you love them Emily, fucking hell. 'Come on Em, you can tell me yeah?'

I shallow, shaking my head in protest 'I'm scared of how you'll react' I whisper opening my close lids to now look up at her, she confused from the look that is now spread across her face.

'You're scared of how I'll react?' she repeats when three loud knocks bang against the floor making both me and Naomi jump instantly.

'Campbell' Comes the gruff male voice from outside, the frosted glass on her office door showing a big built silhouette, she sighs relaxing her body back down onto the floor until the banging continues 'Naomi you in there?' the voice get's louder, door handle being pulled down slightly from the outside as he tries to get in.

'I'll be a minute' she shouts angrily, smiling at me sadly before she peels herself off the floor. I know what to do now when things like this happen because it isn't the first time someone's disturbed us. She goes over to the slated mirror on the wall to tidy up her appearance and I take the seat for visitors by her office, my file spread out on the table to give the excuse of what we have been doing in here. Kicking the vodka bottle out of eyes way, one last stroke to her lips and ruffled hands through her hair she walks over to the door, taking a deep breath before she pulls the bolt unlocking and opening it.

'Yes?' she says flatly, covering most of the door with her body as she opens it a little.

'Is Fitch in here?' he says, she shifts back slightly keeping me out of view, not that it would matter that much anyway.

'Yes, we're going over her files at the moment Walker, so I should really be getting back to that' she answers him plainly, but doesn't close the door over yet.

'Again?'

'what?' she asks, he sighs,

'You're going over her files with her again? I doubt they need to be checked that much' he laughs, I notice her grip on the door tighten as her finger nails almost turn pale white, now it's her turn to sigh in frustration.

'I'm sorry Walker but don't you listen to any of the fucking staff meeting we have every morning?' she spits at him and I spin round in my chair in surprise, the return of Miss Campbell is here, he stutters his answer before she continues 'guessing that's a no?' she laughs bitterly 'if you actually paid attention you'd know that Emily here,' she swings the door fully open now, coming into few is a more orange than usual Mr Walker and his pervy glare as I shyly smile over at them 'got punished a couple of weeks ago, therefore a officer must keep a daily report on her until the gov seems fit for her to get her personal items back' she concludes, I sit awkwardly watching this act out 'so did you just come here to learn the rules, or did you actually want something?'

He picks his sleazy jaw off the floor, clearing his throat as he straightens his body upright, pushing up his tie before looking back at her 'she's got a visitor' he simply states, voice sounding like he's just be kicked in the balls.

'Oh right, well I'll send her down when we're finished' with that she slams the door shut right in his face and I can't hold it any longer, I laugh, I laugh hard and loud before she joins in too

'You're horrible, I think he shit himself!' she smirks walking over to me with her devilishly eyes.

'Yeah well, I aim to please'

**

* * *

**

'Katie!' I announce a little more happy than I usually would upon greeting her, half due to the alcohol and other half due to the fact that I've actually had an alright day, she eyes me suspiciously when I take the familiar plastic seat in front of her.

'Alright Em, don't act too excited yeah? It's not like I don't see you every day or anything' she laughs lightly, I reach forward taking her hand by surprise.

'I'm just so happy to see you' she tugs her hand away, raises a very newly plucked eyebrow at me.

'Babes not being funny or anything but I've just had a manicure' she flashes her freshly painted nails in front of me before leaning over slightly to look deeper into my eyes 'what have you taken?' she asks quietly looking around at the guards, I scoff shaking my head at her in disbelief

'And how're you doing Katie?' I mock rolling my eyes at her and she smiles.

'I'm fine, just sorting things out for you know' she clears her throat mutters a quiet 'university' I roll my eyes again, I don't want her to feel like she has to dumb down her achievements just because I'll probably never do anything like that, I want her to feel happy about what she's doing.

'You can mention it you know?' I say, smiling slightly at how uncomfortable she's gone 'I'm proud of you Katie, god knows I thought you wouldn't even get into college' she mocks shock, hands coming over to lightly slap me as she begins to laugh to, it goes quiet then until she notices the content in my eyes and smiles.

'And how's Naomi?' she smirks. I'd told her everything basically from the start. How when we first met she was a complete bitch to me and locked me in one of those cold rooms. I almost had to restrain Katie from getting out of her seat after I told her, her shouting the odds about how she was going to kill the fucking slut and how I could even like her after doing that but then I explained everything. From the first kiss to how she comforted me after my own fucking mother couldn't be bothered to, this settled her down a bit but I could still see Katie had a dislike for the blonde.

'She's fine, I don't know' I mumble quietly, she pulls a pack of ciggies out of her bag, signalling to the guards for permission, he nods as she lights it up and inhales deeply before flicking it in the supplied metal ashtray.

'Fuck off you don't know, as if you haven't spent the day cuddled up in her office' I blush violently at her words, okay so maybe I told Katie a little more information than I probably should have.

'Okay,' I say with a smirk ready to take form 'she was fine when I left her ten minutes ago' she chokes on the smoke, tapping the ciggie till it burns out in the ashtray and then begins to laugh.

'So have you shagged her yet?' she says a little too loud for my liking, I shake my head at this and suddenly the look of complete shock enters her face, I actually panic for a moment thinking she's about to have a heart attack when her jaw almost hits the table. 'You haven't shagged her?' I shake my head again confirming this she narrows her eyes at me 'how can you fucking love her if you haven't shagged her?'

'Oh sorry, I didn't know everything had to be about fucking sex' I spit at her, flicking her lighter on and off with my fingers as her eyes burn into my face.

'Well have you told her you love her yet?' she asks and I shake my head again sadly, I've been trying for a couple of weeks now to sort out these feelings and now I finally know I'm terrified she's just going to laugh in my face. She sighs a breath of relief 'Thank god for that' I raise my eyebrow at her.

'I was actually about to tell her before, but then someone told me I had a visitor'

'No, No, No' she repeats shaking her head, fresh ciggie in her hand 'shag her first' she states, nodding her head at me, I frown.

'Why's that so important?'

She leans forward on her elbows 'say you tell her you love her yeah? And then she says she loves you too' I smile at the thought of Naomi loving me back, Katie rolls her eyes 'anyway, you have sex and then you discover she's shit in the sack, she already knows you love her so now you can't get rid of her, but if you don't tell her first then you can just cut her loose without feelings in it?' I stare at her in disbelief 'don't look at me like that, worked with all my boyfriends'

'That's a pretty fucked up logic Katie' I laugh and she shrugs her shoulders, lighting up.

'speaking of boyfriends' she smirks and I groan, I know where this conversation is going because she spent the past 3 years laughing at me about it 'JJ's been asking about you' I groan louder now making her chuckle 'I think he wants to come and visit'

Three years ago when we left school we went to a party, I got completely out of my face and rather upset when I saw the girl I'd had a crush on for years eating some guys face in the corner, bear in mind I wasn't out of the closet then so I couldn't cry to Katie about it and that's when I spotted him in the corner, wrenched between a rather sexuality active couple on the couch was the curly haired geek in my English class or as I would get to know him that night JJ. That's the night I decided I was going to lose my virginity, fuck her and fuck the guy who was now leading her up the stairs. Who better to lose my virginity with that someone who is obviously going to want to do it more than me? So we got talking, I can't remember what about because believe me I was too pissed to even remember my own name, all I know is that I lead him to the bedroom and he was nervous. Long story cut short he couldn't get it up and I went sick all over his trousers, so basically my big virginity decision wasn't happening that night. I begged him to find Katie for me which he kindly did stuttering all the time and asking if I was okay, she found me of course and I had to tell her everything that happened which made her slightly concerned but also nearly piss in her knickers and tease me for the rest of my life. Even after I came out the closet JJ still continue to constantly stalk me all the time, to be honest I didn't mind it that much because I obviously knew nothing was ever going to happen.

'Oh JJ' I smile casually just to wipe that smirk off Katie's face 'how is he?'

'He's got a girlfriend now actually' I choke on my own breath, fuck how long have I fucking been in this place?

'JJ has a girlfriend? Fucking hell, I really need to check my Facebook more often' I joke, she bursts out laughing.

**

* * *

**

'This can't be edible, look Em it's got fucking mould on' Karen's food tray was currently pushed under my nose for me to detect whatever shit they were serving today, it was special Monday which meant we didn't know what meat would be served and today it definitely looked like a fucking horror movie prop. I push it back over to her, making a gagging noise in process.

'That's why I don't fucking eat it' I comment, digging a fork into my vegetables as she continues to look at the moulding piece of meat in amazement. She pushes it under Effy who's silently staring down at her tray.

'What do you think Eff? Would you risk it?' she points at her food and Effy just shrugs 'because I'm fucking starving' she says, 'should I just cut the mouldy bit off?' she shrugs again 'I suppose I could put sauce on it but-'

'Karen I don't give a fuck about your fucking meat okay?' she shouts at her, slamming her tray down on the table as she stands up and pushes her chair back 'I'm going to get a drink' she says before storming off to the canteen area, I look up at Karen shocked who doesn't seemed a bit rattled by what's just happened.

'What's up with her?' I point at Effy who's standing in the queue she shrugs.

'Pandora' she simply says and I understand.

It had been just over a week now since Pandora was released from prison, her finding us all separately through the day full of emotional goodbyes and promises of her to take care of herself. It hit our little group hard but hit Effy even harder. Even though she wouldn't admit it she was completely devastated that Pandora left, in a completely fucked up way they were the originals of the little group we had all bonded into. Best mates since they arrived but really connected together again this year and now she was gone for good this time and I don't think Effy had realised that she probably wouldn't be coming back like all those other times.

'She's really upset about this' I comment, looking over at Effy with a small sympathetic smile, Karen nods her head taking a sip of her water.

'Yeah but we all get released sometime right? It's not like when I go I'll never see any of you again' she comments casually and I can't help but smile at her 'anyway change of conversation, she's coming back over' Effy makes her way back, cup in hand casually sitting down in the same place she stormed away from moments again, completely acting like nothing had just happened.

It goes silent, awkward silence.

'So Emily, did Katie visit you again today?' This is what I like to call Karen's attempt at making an awkward situation less awkward, I just smile and nod my head gently at her,

'Yeah but she's off to University soon, so she'll probably be too busy to come all the time' I say sadly, because in a couple of weeks time Katie will of started Bristol university and all her time will be taken up with assignments and practical work, even though Katie promised me nothing would change, it would and I knew it. She was still living at home, apparently mum didn't want her to leave because of the stain the family had already been put under this year, a load of bullshit if you ask me.

'It'll be alright you know, Fred's goes to university in Newcastle and even he's here to visit me every two weeks, how crazies that?' If you're in a room with Karen for more than 10 minutes her brother will be mentioned, it doesn't bother me, and in fact I love it when she talks about her past and how close they are and it makes her happy too, I think he's the most important person in her life.

'Karen what does he do, your Freddie?' she smiles, leaning her arms on the table before she begins to tell me.

'He studies-

'Engineering at Newcastle University' Effy finishes for her in a mock voice 'fucking hell Karen, we know already alright? You've told us at least ten times' she spits at her and Karen's happy face from a second ago turns into a frown, her eyes dropping to her tray and back to the mouldy food she was playing with before, and I snap.

'Fucking hell Effy, don't take it out on her just because you're still upset about Pandora' I yell at her, putting a comforting hand onto Karen's shoulder getting a tiny smile out of her before she looks back down to the tray, Effy scoffs.

'Oh fuck off Emily' she says plainly, this pisses me off even more.

'You know what Eff? You should really start treating us nicer than you have been this last week, because Pandora's gone okay? Were the only friends you have anymore but if you keep this up maybe _you_ can fuck off'

She scoffs again, picking her tray up 'I don't have to fucking deal with this' she mutters under her breath, slamming the chair back under the table as she starts to walk away, but not before she turns around to look at me with a smug smile 'oh by the way Emily, Tell Naomi to be a bit quieter when she sneaks in our cell tonight, I need my beauty sleep' she winks and I freeze. Karen doesn't know that I've still been seeing Naomi, she thought the day I punched her we stopped talking to each other and I never really corrected her. Karen's head suddenly turns my way, guilty eyes now focused on my tray.

'What does she mean, you haven't spoken to Naomi in like a month?' she questions, eyes raises at me in confusion and when I don't answer her she continues 'right Em? When you punched her you stopped speaking right?' she repeats more heavily this time and I sigh.

'Not exactly' I mutter quietly.

'Not exactly as in you haven't spoken to her, or not exactly as in you're still seeing her behind my back?' she accuses and I finally look at her, she's angry.

'Karen...'

'What is it Em, go on answer me?' she spits and I sigh again.

'After I hit her, she followed me and explained okay? But everything that got said Pandora mixed up, so in the end it was just a giant mistake' I laugh nervously but the expression on her face doesn't change.

'So you told Effy _I'm going to sell drugs and nearly get you killed in the process_ but you didn't tell me? The person I trust the most couldn't even fucking tell me' she repeats, following Effy's actions and getting up from the table, slamming her plate down and making a exit for the halls to our cell, I follow her of course

'I didn't tell Effy, she walked in on us and she just knew anyway' I say, following her every step but she doesn't follow 'Karen please, I would of told you eventually' she stops on her heels, turning around in the hallway and pointing her finger in my face

'Eventually? Emily it's almost been a month since it happened, we've actually talked about her since and you've just sat there and lied to me all along? You talk about not being able to trust anybody in here but maybe I just can't trust you' she shouts going to walk away again to I grab her shoulder

'Ladies what's going on?' Oh god, Naomi enters the hall from the canteen, walking towards us and I hear Karen scoff instantly. She looks between us suspiciously, obviously looking at me longer than Karen which seems to just piss her off more.

'Oh great!' she exclaims turning around to face me and Naomi with a fake smile 'out of all the officers in there it had to be you to follow us out didn't it?' she questions and Naomi turns to me confused.

'Sorry?' answer says and Karen starts laughing before she turns to face me.

'Look at you!' she spits at me 'You're so fucking in love with her that you just don't fucking care about anything anymore' I get a sick crippling feeling in my stomach at her words, Naomi standing behind me so I don't have to see the reaction on her face to those words. I don't reply, just continue to stare in shock at the thing I've been scared to be revealed most as just be loosely thrown out in a stupid little argument.

'I leave soon, maybe it's best if we just keep out of each other's way since then' she smiles sadly before turning around leaving a completely stunned me and Naomi alone.

**Thanks for reading! review? ;)**


	13. Chapter 13

**Hi! again this is seriously posted late and I'm sorry :( but still thanks for all the reviews for the last chapter.**

**I think this is the longest chapter I've ever written, so I hope it doesnt bore you ahaha.**

**Read/Review. Thank you!**

'You told her?' Comes the frustrated voice from behind me, I continue to watch Karen's retreating figure hoping that she'll at least turn around to throw me one last look but she doesn't as she vanishes around the corner heading to her cell. I sigh, shoulders slumping to turn around to now face the angry prison guard that is absolutely fuming behind me. Seems like the fact that she's just been told I'm completely in love with her doesn't even matter from the way she's currently looking down at me 'You told her what we've been doing?' she whispers quietly but still angered, face quickly scanning around the place to make sure no one else could hear the conversation, I shake my head at her nervously.

'Effy told her' I breathe out barely audible before quickly slamming my eyelids shut at the fact I've probably just made this situation 10 times worse, her now knowing that Karen isn't the only one who knows about us, I chance a quick look up at her eyes to see them growing bigger by the second.

She wrestles her lip between her teeth, shaking her head in disbelief at me whilst I wait for her to say something, anything that would probably release this tension between the two of us, 'I thought we promised to keep this a secret?' she spits at me and I sigh because I only half remember that promise due to the fact that her hands were making its way slowly over my clothed body at the time, I'm sure my promise was a moan into her lips. I smile to myself remembering this until my eyes catch the sight of her lips moving furiously and then I realise I completely blanked out of the important conversation '...but obviously this is just a bit of gossip for you and your _little friends _entertainment so why bother?' she concludes, still giving me that disappointing head shake as she gives me one last look and turns from me heading back into the canteen, I instantly move after her trying to get her to understand that none of this is really my fault.

'Gossip? I thought you knew me better than to gossip!' she scoffs, not turning around but slowing down her pace slightly which gives me time to catch up to her and touch her shoulder softly 'I didn't lie to you, I really didn't tell anyone' I ensure her and she stops completely now, a couple of steps away from the busy canteen door, I gulp watching her take her time to take the whole information in 'Obviously Karen found out like a second ago, and Effy...' I add with a small chuckle 'Effy just knew, I don't know how she does it but she just knew' I finish. She turns around with an amused look plastered across her face.

'Effy just knew?' she repeats and I nod my head shyly at her as she starts laughing 'then maybe we should release her' she says and I look at her confused 'yeah, she seems to have the all knowing mystic power, surely that's too important to keep locked up' she finishes rolling her eyes at me and I frown with her basically taking the piss out of me, I'm about to retort when the sound of heavy boots and loud banter fill the halls, a officer dragging a disruptive inmate past me and Naomi as I innocently stand next to her, the officers nod at each other whilst the inmate scowls at me before passing by us, both of them leaving the hall.

'Get back to your cell' Naomi simply says when their gone, turning her back on me and taking her final steps to reach the cold metal canteen doors.

'Get back to my cell?' I repeat and she nods her head, hand reaching for the door handle, she can't keep doing this to me, turning hot and then cold within a fucking second, it's hard enough being in jail but having to be around her all the time couldn't be more frustrating, I take a deep breath nervously exhaling before I talk 'did you not hear what Karen said?' I whisper moving my eyes from the back of her head to the ground, she nods her head again 'and?' I ask hopeful voice coming out in a tired squeak as her hand now freezes on the door, she begins to turn around again, softer expression on her face this time when I finally lift my eyes to meet hers, she scrunches her lips side to side sudden shy persona taking over her emotions, she clears her throat.

'Emily,' it comes out softly before the canteen door is pushed open from behind Naomi, disturbing her important words but also pushing her body forward straight into my arms, safely wrapping them around her waist slightly to help her stand up right again, a soft giggle comes from the doorway as we look over.

'Sorry Campbell, didn't know you were standing there' Mr walker apologises making me roll my eyes straight away at the fact he's currently perving at the way Naomi has fell on me, she straightens up, pushing herself out of my arms and sending me a small nervous smile as she turns back to walker. He looks between us again, Naomi folding her arms along her torso and me awkwardly standing between them, silence. 'Just going to meet the new inmates' he says to Naomi, prison banter as I continue to stand there, I grind my teeth together as she smiles at him, I'm about to leave when he says something that stops me in my tracks 'we should do last night again sometime' with that he pushes past us continuing his journey, me noticing that Naomi isn't looking at me anymore. Jealously travels through my body as I notice the playful look he throws her before he disappears.

'What happened last night?' I ask straight away, she looks up plainly

'Nothing' she mutters I sigh sadly, running hands frustrated through my dry hair, hating how it feels, hating that I can't help but think about how shit the colour is fading even though I'm in the middle of something more important.

'Oh because "let's do it again" is nothing' I reply sharply, slightly laughing at the fact that she can just fucking call whatever the fuck that was nothing 'I mean he was basically fucking you with his eyes when he walked away' I instantly regret letting her know how jealous I am. She sighs, biting her lip as if she's trying to calm herself down.

'It was nothing!' she shouts at me, pulling the slightly ajar canteen door shut then turning back around to me 'and it's got nothing to do with you so just mind your own fucking business' my chest tightens, hands slightly gripping to the wall shocked by her sudden rage, unwanted tears starting to appear under my eyes.

'Right' I say before turning around and following the steps of Karen and Mr Walker to the cell block, her heels hitting the floor as she slowly walks up behind me.

She sighs loudly 'Where are you going?'

'Don't know' I reply, lightly turning around on my feet throwing her a heart breaking fake smile as she looks at me sadly 'probably go and see if Effy's up for a shag' I shout, she jumps slightly. I smirk to myself happy to get that type of reaction out of her. Her face drops, eyes widening almost immediately 'not that it's any of your business _of course'_ I conclude turning back around smugly smiling my way down the halls and back to my cell. She doesn't follow, instead of heels there's complete silence in the halls as I turn the corner away from her.

So Karen's pissed off at me, Effy is depressed and hiding what she really feels with anger and Naomi's a bitch, great such a typical Monday fucking evening in this place then. I laugh to myself slightly psychotically thinking about how fucking bitchier my life has become since I came in here, my friends wouldn't fucking talk to me like this on the outside, they wouldn't also go on about it as if I've kept the words biggest secret from them, and girlfriends, well to Naomi a piece of fucking meat that she can kiss then go out with somebody else wouldn't also treat me like this. I'm stopped in my steps, something so familiar yet unnatural making me freeze in spot and search around like a manic, and that's when I see it.

The blinding light coming from the end of the corridor leaking through the open fire exit door that's usually bolted shut, the wind lazily drifts through reaches me as it screeches past, tree's rustling fill my ear drums as the lazy prison cleaner comes into view, fat bald man chewing at his gun disgustedly as he continues to squeeze polish onto the silver metal bar, wiping it down in a hurry before he moves back over to his cart seemingly to get a new can, the only thing I notice is how unsecure the place has been left, him leaving the fire exit door to freedom slightly ajar, him also carelessly not looking to actually see if there is anybody else around but himself. I shock myself that I'm actually excited by this, an open door to freedom, one little man standing in my way that I've actually convinced myself that I could take him, run past and finally get out of this place without any hassle. I'm broke out the haze by him repeating a number of swear words as the can of polish is dropped onto the floor and rolled a couple of inches away from him and now I'm sweating, heat rising in my body and adrenaline pumping _there's no one guarding the door_ I chime to myself _there's no one guarding that fucking door_. He bends down further, breathing more heavily at the position he's currently in to reach the can, the rough winds blows the slightly ajar door more open creating more light and my breath hitches _you're actually thinking about this _he still isn't up, his chubby fingers continuing to stab at the can, trying to pick it up but making it roll away even more, I start to take my first step forward.

'Beautiful day isn't it?' I stop in my tracks, turning around to be met with the one and only Governor Campbell smirking down at me over his grey moustache, blazer full of prison badges and eyes shining at me as if he's caught me doing something, as if he knew what I was planning.

'Huh?' I reply confused and he smiles even more, gesturing his head over to the fire escape which I follow, cleaner now fully reached the can and bolting the door back over, our existence in the hall still not noticeable to him, Disappointment drains through my body, missed opportunity passing me.

'The weather' he repeats chirpy, sickly smiling at me as he rubs both of his palms together 'lovely sun for this part of the country don't you think? Very unusual this time of the year' he comments, and I can't help but think he's playing some kind of twisted mind game with me, I shrug my shoulders at him 'never the less, still lovely' he finishes with, cleaner rolling the trolley of products past us and down the hall as if we're not even here.

'I wouldn't know' I say, not having been out for a couple of weeks since my punishment, fresh air is probably what I needed most, no actually I craved it but I'm not begging him for something so trivial which would give him pleasure out of me pleading with him, I smile softly at his harsh exterior then continue my original plan of walking to the cell.

'No you wouldn't' he repeats slowly 'where are you going?' the simple question makes me stop instantly, just a couple of minutes ago his daughter was asking me the same exact question but they couldn't be more different if not sometimes the same.

'My cell' I mumble as he begins to walk up to me, smile on his face as he finally catches up to my steps.

'I'll walk you shall I' he says, I shake my head.

'No it's fine, I know where it is'

'So how are you settling in?' he cuts in avoiding my protests, basically telling me that I never had a choice in the matter and he's walking me 'it's been a couple of months now, all's well I'm guessing?' he asks again and I just shrug at him, slightly suspicious at why he's being moderately nice to me and even asking me questions in the first place, we continue to journey to my cell, one agonisingly painful step at a time.

'Alright I suppose' I simply answer, he nods his head in content.

Silence falls again, sound of my flat shoes and his heavy leather ones creeping the corridors, I'd usually spend all of my lunch time in the canteen, believe me I'd do anything to stay out of this cell for as long as possible but after everything that's happened, I really think I want time alone. When we finally reach my cell, me gesturing at it when my hands and a fake small smile. He stalls me, looking down at me with her mind working on over drive.

'Your punishments over, you can start going on the yard again from tomorrow' this perks me up again slightly, happy yet slightly confused expression across my face as I look back up at him, usually all I'd get if I saw him where a couple of nasty looks but now he's actually trying to make conversation with me 'I think it would be good if you started to socialise a bit more... you know find some _inmates _to talk to' I just nod my head at him, not actually wanting to state that I have Effy and Karen and I'm doing perfectly fine alone anyway even if I can't ignore the way he stated inmates a bit more loudly than the rest of the sentence. He starts to walk away then, opposite direction to where we came and probably down to the block where his office is 'just remember Emily, don't get too attached because nothing lasts forever' he doesn't stop when saying this, his back still turned to me, him still walking away but still his words hit me as some kind of warning, I raise my eyes brows to his retreating back before pushing the cold cell door and entering, the last thing I'm thinking before quickly crawling up the ladder and dropping into my bunk in the empty cell

What a fucking weirdo.

**

* * *

**

Katie hadn't been to visit me for 2 weeks now, all she done was blubber down the phone every time I could call her, saying how much of a bad sister she feels and how when she gets back she's going to visit me every day without fail. I wasn't angry; to be honest I didn't even blame her at all for my fucking bitch of a mother surprising her with plane tickets to Spain. I was convinced that the only reason mum did it was to keep Katie away from me, she'd probably already told most of the family how much of a disappointment I was and how if Katie visits she'll probably end up like me, but dad disagreed, he visited me when he could too, telling me that the tickets were a present for Katie's good exam results and also a little trip before she starts university. He even told me that when I get out and go into University I'd be treated exactly the same; I scoffed at how serious he was talking about me getting into university. Believe me my family has never been completely perfect, dad finding condoms in Katie's room when we were 14, me coming out over a lovely family wedding and then James cross dressing in the middle of school but now it feels like it's all over, I feel like Emily. Not Emily Fitch daughter of Rob and Jenna Fitch, Just Emily. I feel like I have a sister, but just not a family anymore and it's the worst feeling of being alone I've actually felt in my life.

Getting back to my cell after the talk with governor psycho gave me time to lie down, I was surprised that Effy wasn't actually in here, after all the way she stormed off I would of thought she'd be sobbing into her pillow or something, but her bed was fully made and looked like she hasn't been in here for a while. I Sighed, pulling the tin from under my pillow and pouring the contents onto my lap as I sat with my back against the freezing walls on my bunk, photo's fell over my legs, me smiling instantly at the first one being me and Katie sat next to James when he was first born, next one of us on our first birthday and the next most recent, just a photo of Katie alone on our 18th, obviously I didn't make it that night with being in hospital and my dress covered of blood but this photo I snagged from Katie's frame when she wasn't looking and I was packing my bags for jail, I loved the photo really, she was amazing and I wish I could of been there for her that night. What are people going to think when she starts university? Jesus what do people think of her now, because we're twins she'll constantly to judge on my fucking crime and it's just not fair. Tears begin to shine in my eyes as I clutch the photo harder between my fingers, lying back so my head is now on the pillow and my body is rolled up in a protective ball in myself eventually falling asleep in a sea of memories.

I wake much later, it's been a couple of hours by the dullness of the room, stretching my limbs and adjusting my eyes as the steps and banter of the other inmates start to fill the air of the corridor, eyes instantly snapping to the small barred window at the top of the cell to see the sun has now gone in leaving a dark shadow across the prison courtyard. I don't move, head hitting the pillow as I stare up at the bland cell ceiling, and that's when I notice that the sound from outside has now got louder.

'You weren't in the hall so...' my head snaps up from the pillow to the now open cell door and sheepish Naomi leaning on it, the photos still covering my body are now spread around the sheets as I lazily rub my eyes with balled up fists, she smiles weakly at me but I don't return it. Lock up was usually around 10pm which meant we had to be in our cells before then, usually a hour before people would gather in the main hall to just hang out.

'I didn't feel like it' I respond coldly, sitting up more, gathering the pictures along the sheets in my hand, she starts to walk over to the bunk slowly, lowering her eyes to the pieces of paper on the bed, I follow her site to one nearest to her, a picture of my dearest mother, her mouth grows into a gentle smile.

'Is this your mum?' she asks not breaking her eyes from the picture, I see her hand start to reach for it, I leap forward dragging it away from her sight, keeping it safe in my hands, not wanting to let her look at the women who's been nothing but shit to me these past couple of months, she looks up at me hurt.

'Yeah' I reply briefly, taking a final quick look at it myself before opening the tin and encasing the photos safely back into it.

'Not shagging Effy I see' she says, laughing nervously as I turn around to place the tin back under my pillow, I cringe at the fact I even said that, thinking about how embarrassing it would of been if Effy actually heard me, also slightly worried that she isn't back in the cell yet. I close my eyes for a second before turning around to face her head on.

'Haven't seen her yet, I'm sure there's time later' I smile at her, she sighs.

'Emily,' she says sadly, coming closer and closer by the second 'You have to understand, we can't just let anybody know about us carelessly' she states softly, reaching the metal bar of my bunk, I shift myself back straight away 'If not for my job, then for your safety too' if I actually wanted people to know about us I'd probably agree to her, the amount of shit I'd get for loving 'The bitch Campbell' Jesus you wouldn't believe. I don't answer her, lying back down on the pillows with eyes trained on the ceiling again, I hear her breathing become deeper, her heels tapping in the same spot she's standing in.

'I feel the same way about you too' it's quick and barely audible but it doesn't stop my heart from missing a beat. I shoot up from the bed just in time to see the shy small smile spread across her lips, then her back turns and she's walking away. I can't do anything to watch her leave in disbelief,

'You love me' I say more to myself than anything, words bouncing off the cell and vibrating around the room.

'Of course I love you Emily' Effy enters the cell with a smirk on her face, noticeable red rings around her eyes from where she's probably been crying, I smile at her in relief that she's back after her little break down before, her smirk doesn't falter as she makes her way up my bunk to sit at the bottom of my bed 'by the way did you just give Naomi a quick one or something?' she asks genuinely and I can't help but snort in laughter 'because she's just gave me the biggest smile ever passing me in the halls, and seriously the last time I saw her smile at me like that was when I got transferred to this prison'

I giggle at this, shaking my head at her slowly 'She probably just doesn't want you to tell people about us' she raises an eyebrow at me

'You told her I knew?'

I launch into the full story, from her storming out the canteen, to Karen blurting out my secret to Naomi, even how her creepy dad walked me back to the cell, she looks overwhelmed for a second, nodding her head at me as I continue to tell her my story, then her face drops.

'fuck Em, this is all my fault' I shake my head in protest because in actual fact it's all my fault, she dismisses it with a handshake 'if I wasn't such a fucking bitch before, Karen wouldn't of known' I shrug as she scans me with confused eyes 'why aren't you knocking me out?' she asks laughing which I join in with her.

'Because you only told Karen what I should of told her weeks ago anyway' I sigh sadly, she takes my hand in hers which I can't help but feel comforted by again, things changed these past couple of weeks with Effy, we actually liked each other more than we did originally from the beginning. She wasn't tough or damaged; I just think she was mostly lost like we all are. 'Things are completely fucked up again aren't they?' I say sadly, she smiles.

'It'll be fine, she'll get over it' she says calmly and I can't help but believe her for a second 'I don't get why she's so upset anyway, it's not like everybody else knew but her' she turns her head to me then, smirk growing massive on her lips 'unless she fancies you too' I burst out laughing straight away, she doesn't join in, just raises her eyebrow at me in question.

'No,' she doesn't look convinced 'No! Jesus Eff, it's Karen, she's straighter than my sister, and that's saying something' It hasn't even entered my mind and I won't fucking let it, there's simply no way that it's even true, since Karen none stop also talks about her Ex she broke up with before she came in here, she's still clearly in love with him. 'Shut up Effy' I say, throwing a pillow over my face and sighing with frustration, she laughs.

It goes quiet then, taking the pillow away from my face to see Effy staring into thin air 'where have you been all day anyway?' I ask, she snaps out of the daydream to face me with a small smile.

'Pandora came to visit me' I smile, like actually beam because I've been wondering why her mood had suddenly lifted, she returns the smile, and I can't help but shuffle closer to her on the bunk.

'How is she?' she shrugs.

'she's great, once I got past all the screaming, hugging and crying she managed to tell me she's found herself a boyfriend' I laugh, nodding my head as she continues 'apparently they have well flipping mega sex'

**

* * *

**

It would be Wednesday the next time I'd see Karen, I hadn't seen her in two days, since we don't share the same cell and are on two different blocks in the same sector we usually only see each other around times we eat and also when we're doing chores, but she wasn't there anymore, obviously I was convinced she was ignoring me. As for Naomi, we hadn't really spoken until she told me she felt the same, but I knew this time she wasn't ignoring me and for once work was actually getting in our way. She'd be in the canteen, she'd also be in the halls when I was around, only this time her dad was constantly fucking plastered to her side, the only thing we could do was send sad looks over at each other and promises of having a proper conversation when Governor Campbell would actually fuck off.

'Remind me why we are going to the fucking library in our free time' huffed Effy, I couldn't help but laugh at the books stacked up in her hands, and the way she was acting they looked they weighed a ton.

'Because I have to take these back' I gestured to the piles of books both in our arms 'and I always go the library, maybe you should start to read' she scoffs, fitting the books back into place as we continue down the quiet corridors to the library, it wasn't really a library, you didn't have a time limit to give the books back, which meant by time I'd noticed, our cell was covered in them and so today was the day I was returning them, obviously with the excuse that they were too heavy for me to take alone.

We turn the corner then, suddenly the books are dropping to the floor as there's a heavy jab in my left side, leaving my body to hit the wall and fall to the floor, I'm dazed for a couple of seconds before I feel someone tugging me and frantic voices coming from above me.

'What the fuck are you doing?' I hear Effy shout, tugging harder on my arms 'Em, you alright? Come on...' she says, helping me up from the floor when I hear the bitter laugh from above, unknown voice that I don't recognise.

'That's right Stonem, pick your girlfriend up' Effy helps me to my knee's leaving me to collect the books off the floor so she can see to the people above us.

'Stonem? How the fuck do you know my name?' there isn't an answer them, until Effy speaks again 'Oh,' she simply says, and this is enough to make me look up, the one that pushed me I notice from the halls, an officer dragging her down them as she scowled at me, but the rest I just know from around the place, never really bothered with me much, the most shocking surprised is when I find Karen in the middle of them, guiltily looking down at me and then snapping her eyes away.

'What do you fucking want?' I hear Effy ask, the main girl, possibly the leader of this fucking group just shrugs her shoulders lazily at Effy, before looking down at me with a smug smile plastered across her lips.

'We just wanted to say a quick hello' she smiles 'didn't we girls?' she asks turning her head around and they all mutter there response, Karen not meeting my eyes even though I'm blatantly staring at her in complete shock.

'Yeah?' Effy says 'well you better leave, or you'll be saying a quick goodbye' she smiles at them this time, I stand up using my hand support on the wall, most of the books now placed in my arms. I'm sure the massive one in the middle is about to throw a punch, me stepping back slightly to get out of her way, she looks at Effy with a bland expression before turning back around to the girls.

'let's go' she simply says, pushing past me and Effy as her gang of twats follow her, Effy snatching Karen's wrist before she has time to disappear in the group.

'What the fuck?' Effy simply says, 'what are you doing?' she spits at her, Karen drags her wrist away, giving me and Effy her toughest look before taking a deep breath.

'I'm not fucking doing anything, she's my new cell mate, aren't I allowed to show her around the place?' Effy begins to laugh.

'Show around? You call that showing around?' she runs her hands through her hair, turning away before she turns back to Karen 'is this what you want? Go back to the days in here when we were involved in all that shit?' I just watch them two bat the conversation forwards and backwards, I don't know what happened in there earlier days in here, but I'm intrigued. Karen doesn't answer.

'Their bad news' Effy simply says, Karen scoffs,

'Coming from you? The fucking queen of trouble' she spits at her, folding her arms tighter around her body.

Effy looks at me guiltily, before addressing Karen again 'I might of dealt drugs, but their different-'

'I don't fucking need you to look after me, I'm a big girl, can probably make my own decisions by now' Effy doesn't reply, just spitefully looks at her, Karen turns her glare over to me, being quiet and just observing them both in the corner, I shiver.

'Don't look so worried, I haven't told anybody about your little fucking secret' she begins to walk away as me and Effy watch her go, she turns to me, studying my face.

'Do you think you could take these to the library alone?' I nod my head, 'I'm going to see who that little fucking bitch thinks she is' with that she starts to follow Karen, determined steps as she disappears out of sight, leaving me very confused and piled with books.

* * *

I kick the hard library door open with my foot, obviously my hands are full of mine and now Effy's pile as I enter the old library, no one ever uses it, in fact I'm actually convinced that before I came into this place anybody even knew it existed. I was determined not to lose my passion for journalism, locked up or not it's still something I wanted to pursue in the further future, obviously now I'm probably not going to get the qualified job I'd hoped for but someone would probably need a shitty journalist for a local paper somewhere.

I load the pile in the middle of the table, placing each book back onto the shelf they belong to, I fucking hate people that just put them back anywhere, seriously, nothing would piss me off more than finding a fucking twilight book in the Shakespeare section. I'm about to place the final book away when I hear a sound from the back of the library, I dismiss it, placing the book in place before walking back over to the table, but then it sounds again and I panic. _Last time that happened you nearly ended up with a broken nose_ I remind myself, quickly racing for the library door before her voice stops me.

'You're here' Naomi.

I turn around, relief flashing across my face that it's tough bastard guard Naomi and not some fucking inmate that was about to slice my face in half, she must see the look on my face, because she begins to smile shyly 'I mean you're always here around this time, not that I follow you all time' she blushes, I don't move, just continue to listen to her stuttering adorably.

'Where's your dad?' I ask playfully, amusement evident in my tone that she smiles.

'Meetings all day, I don't know why he's been following me lately' she admits, shrugging her shoulders at me, I simply nod at her.

'Listen Em,' she scratches the back of her head 'I'm shit at this stuff, completely fucking terrible, as you probably know relationships aren't really my forte' she admits, rubbing her hands nervously together, my throat dries, barely able to get my words out.

'And that is what this is?' I ask she looks up confused; I elaborate 'a relationship? I ask hopeful, I wait for her to tense, stop looking at me so full on or anything that would prove that she doesn't want this, but she doesn't, she stays calm, eyes contact is perfect when she says so sure of herself,

'Yes.'

I walk over to her, eyes staying on her lips the full time as she looks at me, when I reach her I wrap my arms around her neck, caressing the back of her hair with my fingers, before ghostly kissing my lips with hers 'so will you show me I'm yours already?'

**:) Tell me what you think, seriously you can tell me if you dislike it, just make it constructive! haha.**

**random spoilers for next chapter because I'm bored.**

**Naomily loving, ****Naomi reveals a secret, ****JJ comes to visit, ****Karen remains a miserable fuck.**


	14. Chapter 15

**Uploaded a little later than I promised, I'm sorry yet again!**

**This chapter is probably not the best as I'm trying to get used to the story again, sorry if it disapointed you, Just wanted to get this out the way so I could continue.**

**Thanks for waiting so long if you're still following this! thanks for all our reviews! hope everyone had a great new year!**

I attacked her lips straight away, not waiting for her to answer the question because I didn't want her to answer it, I wanted her now, in fact I needed her now and I was going to get what I wanted for a change. Her hands clutch to my back, linking her own hands behind me to push my body closer to her, the kiss is different, it's slow and for once I feel like she actually wants to be here doing this, her head leaning to the left and mine to the right as we continue to change the position of our lips on each others, reluctantly I pull away from the kiss, staying just long enough to enjoy the taste of her bottom lip, before slowly tugging at it and letting it go, looking up to read the expression on her face with a smirk. She swallows, smiling at me before leaning forward to claim my lips again, I take this opportunity to slide my hands under the back of her shirt, caressing the skin gently before reaching what I'm aiming for, the clip of her bra, she pulls back suddenly.

'No' she says my face drops

'I mean, not no to _that' _she mumbles shyly, her eyes dropping to my arms around her waist whilst she blushes.

'I want to... it's just anybody could come in' she lifts her eyes, looking over at the unlocked door and the dusty frosted windows next to it, I follow her glaze.

I run the scenario over in my head, me and Naomi not moving from the current position we're in as my eyes don't leave the door. _We could lock it. _But then chances are some bastard would start banging it down and demanding a reason for why it's locked. _We could be really quiet. _Not possible. I sigh looking back up at her sadly, defeated.

'you're right' I push back from her, leaving her arms fragilely hanging loosely by her sides, shirt still hanging out around her hips from the PG 13 touch up.

'See you in the canteen?' I offer, throwing her a sad smile before turning around and heading for the library exit, I'm stopped by a strong grip on my wrist.

'Do you think that...' she starts, I turn around, waiting for her to finish her sentence, she lightly caresses her thumb across the base of my hand, making my eyes snap down to it and then back up to her smiling face.

'Do you think that we could make it to my office without being caught?' my eyes widen, the smile on her face growing into a wicked one, suddenly she's the confident one and I've turned into the frightening little girl again.

'No one was around when I came in' I stutter out, she smiles eyes flicking from mine and down to my lips every couple of seconds because she tugging her own lip between her teeth and dragging my body to the library door giggling. I let myself be dragged, me lagging behind as she carefully opens the library door, poking her head out and around the corners, and she turns back around to me with an amused expression on her face.

'Go now' she says, pointing out to the empty hall.

'I'll follow you there' she says, and I can't help the excitement from showing on my face, leaning in abruptly and capturing her lips into a shattering kiss before I exit into the hall walking the opposite direction to the way I came in, obviously knowing the way to Naomi's office by the amount of time I've spent in it, I hear the creaking of the door echo through the hall, turning around to see a nervous looking Naomi following my lead. When we're all clear she catches up, both walking twice the speed we usually would and before I know it, she's right at the side of me.

I burst out laughing from the nervous expression she's currently sporting, she smirks turning her head at me 'what?' she asks, I shrug as we continue our journey down the halls. To be honest for me it's kind of a funny situation, we're walking carefully down the hall to go and have sex, planned sex. Her hands shake nervously as she twists the key in the lock, trying too hard that it's not actually opening and she groans in frustration, I rest my hand on her lower back and her hand freezes, door finally opening.

When we make it in side we fumble around, knocking a load of shit off her table, we can't get enough of each other as she guides me slowly to her office desk, then suddenly she freezes again.

'Emily I've never..' she says it quietly, cheeks flushing red as she wipes my saliva off her lips, she not meeting my eyes either, darting around her office but never coming back to fall onto my face, and then it snaps, _god Emily you stupid prick, of course!_

'You've never with a girl' I conclude as if it's the most obvious thing in the world, here I am acting like miss confident when of course this would be her first time with a women, no wonder she always seemed so hesitant when we would stop and start. All my thoughts crash together then when I see Naomi shaking her head at it, I raise an eyebrow.

'You have had sex with girls before?' It contains a hint of jealously, it felt kind of special being the only female she's ever been with, and now that's ripped away, I want to know why Naomi still won't look at me, hoping she doesn't have nothing serious to share.

'No I haven't' she mumbles, I take charge, slowly caressing my hand under her chin and pushing it till her head is coming up and her eyes are meeting mine, she looks worried, my heart beating faster when I see her eyes shining with tears, I begin to panic inside.

'Naomi, what is it?' I ask a little more urgent this time, can't help feeling slightly guilty about what she's hider rather than how upset the girl seems to appear in front of me.

She shakes her head again, taking a deep breath before looking me deadly in the eyes 'I've never,' she sighs, pushing back from my hold slightly 'fuck, this is embarrassing' she says it quietly, probably wasn't meant for my ears, her head snaps up then.

'I've never been with anybody'

The words linger in the air; I'm probably not making her feel any more less embarrassed as my mouth is currently dangling open in shock, Naomi Campbell, my Naomi is a virgin, I almost want to slap myself that the thought didn't cross my mind at all, she sighs at my reaction, standing up and fixing her shirt.

'Look I know what you're thinking, 20 an still being a virgin is-'

I stand up abruptly, cutting off her shaking voice as I raise my hands at her 'No, not at all!' I whale my hands about as she looks at me unconvinced 'I'm sorry, I'm just shocked' she sighs again, turning around from me and crossing her arms over her chest.

'No, not like that just, you're fucking gorgeous' I blurt out, she turns round with her eyes widening, small smirk playing on her lips until she laughs gently, her embarrassment fading and mine only beginning to show, I through her a shy smile.

'I don't think it goes by that' she says sarcastically rolling her eyes at me.

'It's not that I never had the chance, you know' she shrugs carelessly 'Just never really felt right' she concludes.

'oh and let's not forget my military dad' We both laugh, and fair point, if my dad was a complete psycho governor then I know for a fact any boy or girl wouldn't get a yard near me, mines bad enough and he only owns a gym.

She smiles again at me shyly, not looking at my eyes once again; I'm so in love with her at this moment I don't know what to do.

'Don't be embarrassed, it's actually really great' how many times I wished that I could rewind my first time is unreal, let's just say that it was with a boy and that I was also seriously confused about what I was doing, she shrugs, probably thinking that I'm just trying to comfort her.

'We can wait' I suggest, taking a look around where we are, cold office, blank walls, fucking on her table is hardly romantic enough for a first time. I now know why she ran away all those other times, and me stupid fucking Emily caused arguments with her, and then actually punched her.

'I don't want to' her hands trail up my back, under the t-shirt to stroke my smooth skin, my eyes instantly snap to hers, still shy but now she's looking at me, playing with the hem of my shirt and looking at me with those fucking eyes, sometimes I wish I wasn't such a nice person, pushing her back slightly I shake my head.

'Not here, especially for your first time, it's cold and dark and-' she raises one single finger, pushing it to my lips and I instantly shut up, biting her lip it's her turn to shake her head at me.

'I don't care about the place, it's the person'

* * *

'Wow' the only words I can hear Naomi repeat next to me whilst we lie on the floor in a sweaty heap, deeply breathing my wide eyes haven't left the roof since we finished, I think it's one of the best things I've ever done in my life. Her lips, her eyes, finally seeing her body under those tight white blouses, fuck me.

I turn to look at her, I have her right next to me still completely naked with nothing but a small blanket Naomi keeps in her office to keep us warm, yeah the floors hard and cold, making my back hurt but none of that matter to me anymore. I can't help but notice the stillness of her body, her eyes also glued to the roof like mine were earlier.

'Naomi?' I ask quietly, she flinches, breaking the contact from the roof and meeting my eyes, she blushes.

'Sorry, it's just...' she doesn't finish her sentence, eyes suddenly leaving mine to scan down my body, catching the parts of my pale skin that's being revealed by the small blanket, I sigh, feeling suddenly conscious of what her eyes are seeing. Being in here a couple of months means I haven't been on my usual healthy, especially no exercise from being cooped up in my small cell most of the time so I admit I've probably gained a little weight, maybe filling me out more.

'You're so beautiful' she whispers almost as if she can't believe it, dreamily reaching out to stroke the small of my back, continuing until she's stroking up my arms, finding my hand and linking our hands together, I sigh contently watching her. It goes silent again then as her eyes shyly keep scanning my body. I watch her, watch that twinkle in her eye that I've only seen one other time, the time she was pushing me up the wall and bringing me back to my cell, twinkle leaving when she got scared and ran away, at least now I know why.

'I love you' I say, almost an automatically response by just looking at her now, her blonde hair all messed around her shoulders, lip stick that was once there now faded, some traced down her neck, her perfect breasts, legs, hips.

She turns her body, successfully making the blanket rip off both of our bodies, she pushes our bodies more together, searching my eyes, I don't know why but she continues to do it, her face remaining completely serious making me once feel conscious.

'Do you?'

I nod my head, swallowing back my nervousness as she keeps looking at me, breathing out a sigh of relief when a smile breaks out on her face. We both lean over to each other, lips meeting softly, tongues finding each other. I reach my arms around her neck, hands roaming the back of her hair. She shifts her body so she's on top of me. Both giggling as the kisses become sloppier and her hand drops lower down my torso, until a massive knock against the hard wooden door breaks us apart.

'Fuck off' Naomi groans towards the door, surprising me altogether with how calm she looks considering the consequences of both of us being found together like this.

'Naomi it's Don, Wondering if you wanted to catch some lunch?' as soon as I hear that name my blood boils, why's he knocking at my girlfriend's door asking for lunch together? Okay so maybe using girlfriends is not what we are yet but still, I'm fucking her not him. I squirm underneath her, trying to release myself from her arms gripping mine to the floor, she shakes her head at me mouthing a quiet no.

'No thanks' she shouts, keeping her weight balanced on top of my body, his shadow on the frosted glass door not moving.

'The canteens pretty quiet at the moment, we'll be rid of the scum in this place' he says again, and for once I actually feel protected of the inmates in here, yeah we're all in here for a reason even if most of them are here by mistake but still we're not scum.

'Listen I'm busy okay? I'll catch you later'

The shadows still there, me wanting to know why the bastard just won't take the fucking hint, I'm about a second away from jumping up to open the door and show him the position me and Naomi are currently in, maybe then he'll get it into his thick fucking head that she just isn't interested, with a couple of muttered words he's walking away from the door, leaving me and Naomi alone.

She goes to kiss me again, I turn my head to the side where her lips clumsily land on my cheek, she looks down at me confused 'I better get dressed' I say quietly, finally pushing her smooth naked body off me whilst I route around the room for my hastily dissuaded underwear.

'We've got a while till lock up yet' Naomi points out, wrapping her arms around my waist from behind as I try and adjust my bra. 'and I'm sure you still have a lot more to show me' she giggles, I lightly push her arms away suddenly put out of the mood by Mr Walker and Naomi's obliviousness to his flirting, and let's not to mention I've suddenly remembered what he said the other day about them having "a fun night".

I continue to get dressed, trying to ignore the rush that goes through my body every time I catch a glimpse of her naked body limply standing there as I pull my pants back over my legs, followed by the t-shirt I've just collected from the file cabinet.

'Did I do something wrong?' she asks timidly, she starts to dress too, covering her breasts up with the pointless see-through blouse. I can't help but thinking about the fact that this is her first time, right after my first time we both got dressed in silence and never spoke again, a part from the occasional fake smile or kind words whilst we passed through the college halls, I know how horrible that feels.

I sigh, shaking my head to turn around to her worried blue eyes

'He fancies you' I say feeling like a child, a fucking stupid small child who accuses their boyfriends they've had for 4 minutes on the playground of fancying someone else.

'This is about Walker?' she asks confused, I nod my head in confession.

'The way he fucking eyes you as if you're naked every day, him always fucking asking you to do things with him'

'Emily he does that to every female within a yard of him, there's nothing I can really do about it' she explains.

'Maybe you don't want to do nothing about it' I mutter not quite sure how to stop the words from leaving my mouth when I get jealous.

'Emily, I barely enough notice he's doing it anymore, I barely notice anybody anymore because of you' she walks closer to me, lightly grabbing at my hand until I accept hers, she links ours fingers together again 'and I can't explain any of this, and it's all just shocking to me, I think I love you Emily'

It doesn't matter to me that Naomi said think, it's the fact that I've never heard her say love before, and I think she might of just told me she loves me and it feels great, even if I haven't replied to the blonde who is currently looking really nervous right in front of me.

'So you didn't go on a date with him the other night?' I ask carefully, not accusing just wanting to make sure I'm not being lied to, I know the answer as soon as Naomi pulls a disgusted face and squeezes my hand.

'No, he just made it fucking sound like that' the blonde says 'I was out with a couple of friends and he happened to be in the same place, wouldn't fucking leave us alone all night that we just ended up ditching him in the end' I smile as Naomi explains this.

'Good, next time I might have to actually punch him' I say, biting my lip slightly so my smile doesn't break out, she starts laughing, she grabs my hips pulling me closer to her before kissing my nose.

* * *

After lock up I spent the entire night in bed thinking about Naomi, somehow one of the worst situations in my life has brought me to something good. I can't help pushing my luck and actually want to know what it would be like if I met her outside of prison. Would we talked have talked about what we did? Would are dates be full of laughter about difficult inmates Naomi had dealt with at work that day.

'Your thinking's keeping me awake' I laugh at Effy's tired voice coming from the bunk underneath me, wondering how the girl does stuff like that half the time.

'Creep' I throw back at her, catching the small scoff she replies with.

'Actually it's the sound of your fucking nails tapping against that wall' I look up to see my hand resting against the wall on my bunk, tapping at it gently and producing a small sound, something I usually do when I'm thinking things over too much.

'So are you going to tell me what's wrong or shall I wait until your nails have dug a escape hole in that wall?' before I even have time to answer I feel the bunk rocking, Effy's slender fingers appearing at the top of the bunk, she pulls her body up until she's sitting cross legged in front of me, small tired smile plastering her face.

I shake my head at her, stopping my nails on the wall 'There's nothing to tell' I simply answer biting my lip. She laughs, clearly not believing me; she doesn't talk then, just keeps staring into my eyes.

'I had sex with Naomi' I blurt out, not covering up the giant smile that spreads across my face, her eyes widen, mouth opening before a sly slap is applied to my wrist.

'You slut! How was it?' she crosses her legs more in, scooting over till she's closer. It reminds me of the time Katie would hook up with somebody then rate them with me after. She wouldn't tell me about the sex obviously, just how the guy treated her and if he had a six pack or not.

'Good, it felt right' I don't know how else to describe it, Naomi first of all trusting me to be the one she lost it with, making it my responsibility that she at least remember her first time, remember it as a good one that is. I go into minor detail with Effy, basically about fucking on her office floor and also desk once we got most of her paper work off it.

'I can't believe you slept with Campbell, the amount of shit we could get from this' she says offhandedly, I look at her confused, resting my head down on my pillow slightly.

'What do you mean?' she flashes me a small before shrugging.

'Come on Em, Imagine if Gov found out about this, I bet Naomi would do anything to keep it a secret' she winks at me and I feel sick, seeing the old Effy from when she had the drugs come back into play.

'Eff...'

'Chill Emily I'm joking, I know you're not like that' she says and I sigh relief, I never know whether she's being serious or joking which most of the time gets real confusing for me in this place. We both fall asleep on my bunk, Effy falling into the slumber before me. I can't help but wonder if she's going to use the stuff I tell her against me. Okay I might trust the girl again but not as much as the old naive Emily did.

* * *

I'm eating breakfast in the canteen the next morning, for most of the inmates the 15 minutes to eat get's used in the yard smoking, meaning that there's only around 20 people ever in the canteen, it's probably the favourite part of my day. Especially when you can eat your toast looking over at a obviously flushed Naomi who's definitely thinking about the amazing shag you had the night before whilst trying to converse with her colleagues .

You can tell she can't concentrate, continuously moving her fringe to move away from her eyes where she'll catch my eyes and I'll smirk, resulting in her cheeks getting a pinkish blush to them.

'Hey' I bring my eyes up from my plate at the voice, sitting in front of me is a youngish girl with brown hair; I throw her an unsure smile. I have seen her around before obviously as this place is pretty tightly knitted but I've never spoken to her, actually I've never really spoken to anybody outside the small group of friends I've made in here. She continues to smile as I drop my toast to the plate.

'Hi...' I reply confused, sending her a tiny unsure smile.

'It's Rebecca' she flicks off her tongue, scanning her eyes clearly over my body; I squirm awkwardly as she does it.

'Emily' I offer. I try to narrow my eyes past her to see if Naomi's still there, which I admit is a bit unfriendly to do to someone who's just came over to make conversation with you.

'I know who you are, been here a couple of months yeah?'

I nod, not really being bothered to explain why I'm here or how long I'm going to be here. Still I notice she doesn't leave as keeps watching me. Only this time Naomi's eyes are also on the both of us.

'Wanna come outside for a smoke?' she asks, gesturing to the pack of cigarettes in her hand, I smile politely at her shaking my head, because I don't really smoke in the first place and also because I don't know the girl even if she is just being friendly.

'No thanks, I don't smoke' I simply reply, her face drops, but I just divert my eyes back down to my plate, heart beat returning to normal when they see her shadow lift from the table.

'Shame, I would of thought your type would love to be alone with girls' I feel her spit into my ear before doing a spine chilling laugh, I freeze, wanting to keep my sexuality to myself in this place only 4 people actually know Effy, Pandora, Naomi and Karen. They only know because I trusted them enough but anybody else it's strictly my business, you don't have to watch bad girls to know what they do in these places.

I snap my eyes up, really taking in the laughing girls face and that's when it clicks, matching her face with one of the girls who pushed me down in the hall with the books. She walks away then, still laughing as she exits into the yard, I feel sick. Ever felt ashamed even if it was only ever you and one other person in the conversation? That's how I felt now, except it was mixed with anger, especially at the one fucking person's laughter I could hear from the corner of the canteen.

I bolt up from my seat, my chair springing back off its four legs to hit the floor, noise gathering the attention of people, especially Naomi who's now up out of her chair as if she knows something's going to happen.

Brown eyes are snapping up to mine as soon as my hands slam against the table she's sitting at.

'I don't know what your fucking problem is but you had no fucking right' I spit at her, teeth grinding away that it feels like they'll wear down to nothing by the end of this conversation.

Karen looks up, seemingly confused to why I'm standing in front of her accusing her of something that she's obviously done. 'You promised you wouldn't tell anyone!' I spit at her, she scoffs horrible smirk pulling up on her lips.

'I don't owe you fucking anything' she says, spitefully smiling before looking back to her nail beds resting on the table top.

'You're such a bitch' I mutter, turning around deciding to find something more important to do with my time than talk to some self obsessed bitch. Things hadn't got better with Karen at all, I admit lying to her was kind of wrong but she's acting as if I stabbed her, terrible example I know.

'Oh come on Emily, as if it isn't bloody obvious anyway, fucking dyke' she shouts, and I freeze right in the middle of the canteen. Suddenly feeling like that younger teenager who was terrified of telling people who she really was, telling her sister why she didn't have a boyfriend, watch people in college that didn't accept her, the laughter that would hurt her ears every time she walked into a room.

Except this time there wasn't any laughter but I still felt it, felt the tears spring to my eyes as I looked around to see the faces of the inmates all judging me, feeling like once again I was in a place where I wasn't accepted, the last thing I hear before running out the canteen in tears is Naomi shouting my name.


	15. Chapter 16

**2 YEARS. NEARLY 2 YEARS SINCE AN UPDATE. FUCK ME!**

**I have been busy, obviously can't remember what with but I have. This was already on my computer so it's short and pointless but I wanted to give you something. I really want to finish this because ever since chapter one the story has been written in my head.**

**THERE WILL BE LOADS OF MISTAKES BUT UPDATE YAYAYA.**

'I didn't mean it you know' I gasp, dropping the book out of my hand and turn on my heels, eyes widening when I see the tan coloured girl behind me. I take a step back intensively, not really knowing what Karen, used to be the most genuine girl I knew Karen was capable of. She looks hurt by the gesture; I fold my arms watches as she inches closer.

'What?' I mutter, actually wishing the library wasn't so empty anymore.

'I didn't mean what I said before' she repeats. I almost have to ask her to repeat herself again. not believing my eyes at the half assed apology coming from someone I used to consider myself to be close with.

'I don't need your apology' it's a lie. I've needed her to apologise from the start, I keep telling myself I'm going to stop being a push over, it starts here. She can't just think she's going to get me to forgive her after everything she's done.

'But you're getting it anyway. I didn't mean it Emily... I'm not homophobic' I scoff, bitterly laughing at her comment.

'They always say that don't they? Your just like the rest of them Karen'

'You don't even fucking know me Emily' she shouts back, I roll my eyes, picking up the small pile of books I had sorted on the table and stuffing them under my arm. I walk towards the exit, conveniently blocked by her.

'Good job I don't isn't it?' I say before pushing past her. Fright goes through me as she grabs my arm roughly, pulling me back into the library. My back slams against the wall, angry Karen cornering me.

'You don't know anything do you?' she shouts, I close my eyes, preparing for something, a punch, a kick, always expecting the unexpected in this place.

'What's so fucking special about her?' she whispers, my eyes snap open when I can feel the warm of her breath on my skin, I open my mouth, eyebrows raising to the roof at her random question.

'What—'

'You don't even know her; she doesn't even know _you_ Emily. Not like I do' she whispers, I freeze.

'Karen... what are you trying to say?'

Turns out she wasn't trying to say anything, especially when she plunges forwards attaching her soft warm lips to mine, it lasts a couple of seconds with the utter shock of what she's doing. She continues to kiss me, I don't move my lips at all. I push at her shoulders seconds later. She pulls back scanning my eyes before coming in one last time.

'Karen, no!'

She pulls back quickly, stepping away from me in shock at what she's just done. Suddenly her face hardens back into the evil scowl she had on in the canteen, I stand back as well, still in shock at what had just happened.

'What was that?' I ask, eyes widening, she scoffs.

'Don't cum in your knickers... it was a joke yeah?' she laughs bitterly, pushing my books off the table before she storms towards the door. I catch my breath, nearly choking on my words.

'It didn't feel like a joke' I mutter quietly.

She stops before she reaches the door, rests again the door frame with a sigh before she throws me one last look, tears in her eyes before she leaves.

* * *

'Sooo... what happens when I kiss you here?' is whispered into the nape of my neck, I giggle pushing the blonde's body off the top of me, pushing her back towards me seconds later to claim her lips aggressively.

'This was a really good idea' I sigh breaking the kiss, rolling onto my back to pull the itchy covers around our naked bodies. She pulls a face at the stiff blankets before she cuddles herself into my body, I smile happily to myself 'How did you swing this again?'

'Well it's a good thing you have a naughty cell mate really...' she says, referring to Effy being set to the infirmary again for a couple of nights after a fight broke out involving her in the canteen again. 'She's out the way and the rest of the guards think I'm doing a very very long room inspection' she giggles, running her hands under the sheets and across my torso, making me shiver.

I never thought being arrested would involve me being fucked by the sexiest prison officer in my cell, but then again I never expected to be arrested in the first place. For the past week it had been like she couldn't get enough of me, we'd find any excuse to be together and shag each other's brains out, a virgin she was no more.

'So I saw your dad talking to you in the canteen today...' I start, acting like I'm just making conversation, really... I just really want to know what they were talking about to make her look so happy. She usually looked like a little kid being told off when Governor Campbell was around.

'Yeah.' She breathes out, turning over casually to reach for her watch.

'Anything important?' I probe as she squints at the time.

She turns back to me, making eye contact with me briefly before she rolls her eyes smiling 'Nah, just updating me on the new lunch time schedules, boring stuff you know'

I know she's lying instantly, and surprising me it hurts a little to be lied to by her. It shouldn't really, I know being a prison officer she'd need to keep information confidential from a inmate, but I'd rather she just tell me that... not have to lie to me about it. 'Oh'

'Shit Em's it's after 5...' she says, reaching on the floor for her dissuaded underwear. 'I'm on canteen rounds today' she explains, pulling her knickers up her legs as I sit up in bed, watching slowly as the material glades up her long legs, she blushes.

'Guess I'll see you at dinner then... I enjoy the eye contact we share' I sigh jokingly.

'It won't always be like this' she comments idly, placing her pencil skirt on and checking her smudged makeup in the mirror.

I sit up a little straighter, surprised at her comment. She never talked about the future, never talked about what it would be like if I wasn't locked up and definitely didn't talk about the possibility of a relationship together once she was released years from now.

'No?' I ask.

She turns around on her heels smiling. 'No' she simply answers, kissing me sloppily on the lips before winking and carefully checking the halls through a small gap in the door before her leaves. I sigh happily, throwing myself back on the bed.

* * *

'Wow Karen's shooting more daggers than usual today' Effy comments as a look up from the book I'm reading, catching Karen's eyes where they seemingly soften a little before she scowls us again.

'Just ignore her' I mutter, trying to start the next chapter of my book with no avail.

Effy knew when to change the conversation. 'So how's Katie then?'

'She's good' I reply, closing my book over and placing it on the table. 'She's still trying to prove my innocence'

'How's it going?'

'It's not. I've told her to stop trying, it's pointless'

'It would only be pointless if you actually tried to murder the girl, which you never so...'

'That doesn't seem to matter in court' I sigh, quickly scanning the canteen to any sight of Naomi at the officers prison table, disappointed when she's not there yet. 'They won't let me re-appeal; I'll probably rot in here'

'If Campbell doesn't fuck you to death first' she smirks.

'Eff!'

'What?' she explains, face full of innocence 'How you two haven't been found out yet is beyond me' she laughs, flicking through the pages of her gossip magazine. She looks up with my laugh comes to a Holt. 'Em, it was a joke. It's not obvious'

I raise an eyebrow at her. 'Seriously, it's not!' she ensures me.

'Today she said "It won't always be like this" what does that even mean?'

She reaches over, gently rests her hand above mine. 'Probably that she wants a life with you, you know? House, car, shagging on a Saturday morning' I scoff. 'I mean it Em, you're amazing yeah? So this is a temporary setback, but believe me, you won't be in here forever, this place isn't for you okay?'

Tears brim my eyes, happy tears... I sniff, wiping at my eyes. 'In the least dyke way possible... I kind of love you, know you?'

She smiles. Effy doesn't show much emotion, and I've only known her a couple of months but I can't help but think if we met each other outside of here we would have been close friends, if not best friends. Apart from the couple of setback we have had since being locked up together, we've become closer.

'Yeah well, don't let the girls in here hear you say that, wouldn't want them to know that I kind of think you're alright too' we both laugh, between the joking banter I don't notice the harsher daggers being thrown at my head by Karen, or the approaching blonde.

'Fitch, word please' my laughter stops, head swinging around the blandness of the tone, back to the second name callings. I stare up confused at a clearly hurt Naomi, clad in her full ward round uniform, I nod, turning back around at Eff to excuse myself, she shrugs.

* * *

I silently follow Naomi through the crowded canteen, her at least 5 steps ahead of me until we step outside into the corridor. I follow her in continuous silence down the corridor until we come up to a quiet corner, she quickly looks around before she sighs, narrowing her eyes curiously at me.

'What's wrong?'

'So everyone on my canteen table today was just talking about how much they think you and Stonem are fucking'

'What?!'

'Complete bullshit of course' she comments, anxiously playing with her hands. 'Until I look over and see _my _girlfriend holding hands with the slag of the wing' she whispers furiously. I stare at her blankly, unable to get my words out, so shocked by the accusation.

'Are you?' she prods. 'Are you shagging her?'

'I can't believe you'd fucking ask me that!'

'Well—'

'No!' I stop her, her eyes widen. 'Have you told your friends about us?'

'What?'

'Have you told your friends about us? You called me your girlfriend, do they know about me?'

'Emily you know we can't tell people yet'

'Naomi there is no yet? Don't you fucking understand that?' I state, running my hands through my hair.

'I'm going to tell them, I work really difficult shifts and you know that I hardly see them-'

'Bullshit Naomi, fucking bullshit'

'Don't force this on me Emily!'

'then don't accuse me of something you heard over a dinner table!' I storm away, anything but love for Naomi on my mind.


	16. Chapter 17

**Hey bitches,**

**here's another chapter :)**

**thank you for reviewing the last one!**

I was half way through counting how many dents we're in my cell roof, something that had become the norm to me on a boring Sunday afternoon when the cell door bursts open, light from the bright corridors filling the dull empty cell.

'Fitch,' he nods, I sit up, pushing my overgrown fringe behind my ears 'you've got visitors'

'Visitors?' I repeat confused, 'but it's past 6...' I state, eyes briefly flicking over to the analogue clock on our desk.

'I haven't got all day' he states sternly, 'you either follow me or I'll lock the cell'

I slide my cardigan over my shoulders, jumping from the bunk that Effy's lifeless feet are currently draped over. Officer Roberts taps his foot impatiently as I smile at Effy in the deep slumber she'd been in for the past couple of hours.

* * *

'Take a seat here, they'll be in soon' he pulls the chair back, waits for me to sit down before he walks across the large room towards the exit.

'Wait! Who're they?' I shout as he leaves the room. I look around, finding it weird being in the visiting room when there isn't any crying wrecks saying goodbye to their wives, or babies screeching their lungs out.

'Oh Jesus Christ, sort them fucking roots out, bitch' I'm brought out of my thoughts, looking up to see Katie smirking down at me. I leap up, almost falling into her arms.

'Katie!' I smile, 'what're you doing here?' I mutter into her shoulder, pulling back from the grasp to notice the figure standing behind her '...and tom?'

'Please, let's sit down ladies' my solicitor's features moulds into a soft smile as I watch them both sit down opposite me. I look between a clearly jittery Katie and back to a calm Tom suspiciously.

'Can somebody please tell me what's going on?'

'Emily' he laughs gently, trying to calm my obvious nerves. 'Believe me, you're going to want to hear this' he states whilst opening his folder binder.

* * *

It had been an hour since Katie and Tom left, I had raced back to my cell, cheeks red and eyes puffy from the amount of tears shed between Katie and me as she left. I was disappointed to see Effy was no longer in her bunk, so I had spent the last hour writing away in my journal, which was sometimes the only thing I could talk to.

The cell door once again opens; I look up quickly at the last person I was expecting to enter my cell.

'Emily, listen about yesterday...'

I'm up within seconds, journal dissuaded on the bed sheets as I wrap myself inside the surprised blonde's arms. She pulls back when tears start to soak her neck.

'What's wrong?' she asks, concerned.

'I'm getting a re-trial' I whisper, as our eyes continue to lock with each others.

'What?' she asks, reaching up to wipe the tears from my cheeks with her thumb

'You didn't know about it?' I ask, reaching down to link our fingers together.

'No, I've been in the fucking offices all day, but a re-trial?' she asks, clearly surprised.

'Jenny,' I start, trying to calm the happiness coursing through my body 'she got attacked again, they caught the attacker this time Naomi, the _real_ fucking attacker'

Naomi follows me, nodding as I try and get my words out fast. 'They noticed obvious similarities in the attack, another alley way and—'

'And the attacker has admitted to the crime right?' Naomi asks, I frown

'Well no, not exactly... but getting stabbed twice in the same year is a bit of a co-incidence isn't it? And it happening in the same area?'

'Oh Emily...' she sighs, horrible pitying look plastered all over her face.

I push her arms away from me, crossing them defensively in front of me. 'Why are you acting like that? Why are you trying to spoil this for me?'

She laughs 'Em's I'm not'

'You should be fucking happy for me Naomi. It means I might get released from this hell hole. It means that I can live my life again' I rage 'it means we might actually have a chance to be a normal fucking couple!'

Effy enters the cell breaking the silence, her hands covering her eyes. 'Emily, I'm back, hope you're not getting changed. Not that I haven't seen it all before anyway' she giggles, but it dies in her throat when she removes her hands to witness a pissed off looking blonde officer

'It was a joke' Effy says awkwardly hovering by the door 'I've never, you know... seen Emily in any state of undress.'

I throw her a sharp look; she looks back in false horror.

Naomi stares at me long and hard, face like stone. 'Lights out at nine' she demands before turning her back to me, shoulder barging the brunette before leaving us alone.

'Fucksakkkkke' I whine out, slamming my body back against the hard mattress of Effy's bed.

'And what the fuck's up with her face?' asks Eff, walking over to the desk to shuffle through her mail.

'She thinks we've been fucking.'

She suddenly bursts out in laughter, turning around, leaning on the desk slightly. 'Oh god, she's been giving me evil looks all week. Now I know why'

'Not fucking funny, Eff'

'Oh come on Emily. Will you please stop sitting here all puffy eyed and upset. She needs to stop being a pussy about it; we're females in a prison. Not a fucking sex dungeon'

Suddenly I remember why I was writing in my journal just moments ago and my mood shifts, bright smile covering my face. 'I wasn't crying over Naomi...'

'You weren't...?'

'I've got some good news.'

* * *

I lurk quietly outside the canteen, sometime I'd just stand out here if the canteen ever got too loud or over crowded for me. Today was one of them days. Officers pass me throwing me curious looks, probably wondering why I want to spend my spare time in a dimly lit corridor rather than socialising in a canteen.

She's signing the visitors register when I catch her; she's wearing her own clothes with her bag hiked up onto her shoulder, she's about to leave.

'Naomi' I mutter softly as I approach her. She turns around, her shoulders dropping as she lets out an exasperated sigh.

'I'm going home, I'll see you tomorrow.'

'Oh okay, sure' I reply disappointed. She throws me a small sad smile before continuing her journey down the corridor, my throat tightens at every step she takes. 'I love you' I mumble loudly, wanting to show her yet still keeping a low profile around the prison. She stops dead on the spot.

She spins around before walking towards me with raw determination on her face. I'm waiting for a scolding, for her to tell me never to do that around her again, but it doesn't come. What does come is me being pinned against the hard brick wall, her lips seeking out mine in a desperate bid to devour me. She reaches up, palms grasping my cheeks as our tongues dwell together 'I love you too' she hisses out, breathing harshly before quickly kissing me again 'I love you. I fucking love you'

'I know' I mutter, bringing our mouths together again.

'I'm sorry for how I've been this week' she announces when we're comfortably sat in her office time later. Fixing our clothes after the make out session that continued onto her office desk, 'about the whole Effy thing, because I know there's nothing, you know, going on'

'She's just a friend' I state, smiling at her gently.

'Of course, and inside I really know that. But people got talking, and I was so fucking jealous'

'And you do know, Effy is straight' I laugh.

She smiles, her smile is one of a jealous lover who has just found out they are acting completely ridiculous. 'Emily, I'm ecstatic about the re-trail, honestly.'

'But you were—'

'Being a massive dickhead about it?' she smiles sadly 'It's just, I've seen it happen before... people getting their hopes up to be disappointed. I just don't want that to be you'

* * *

'Just heard the good news.' I briefly glance up as the table weighs down. Karen takes a seat facing me with her lunch. I then glance up around me, hoping that this isn't another set up, hoping she hasn't been asked to come over and take the piss out of me, only her friends aren't there.

'Yeah,' I reply, not really knowing where she's expecting this conversation to go. Especially since we basically avoided any eye contact since she unexpected kissed me the other day. I push my half eaten dinner tray away from me 'I'm going to go.'

'No Emily, stay... please' she pleads. 'Don't worry, I won't try and kiss you again'

I look away from her, not really knowing how to react to this yet.

'Sorry about that by the way. I didn't plan on jumping you like that'

'So what was the plan then?' I ask suddenly finding my voice.

'There isn't a plan Emily'

'I really don't get you Karen. For weeks I've just been the _queer _you and your _friends_ laugh about, and then suddenly you have me in a passionate lip lock?' She looks down, unsure. I scoff. 'So what is it then? Get into my knickers to prove how much of a dyke I am?'

'No! Don't be stupid, it isn't like that!'

'Whatever' I mutter disinterested, standing up;

'I kissed you because I can't stop fucking thinking about you okay? She spits. 'And then you lied to me, about fucking Campbell when I thought that you and I could...'

'Karen...'

'I'm not even gay,' she says more to herself, 'but it doesn't even matter to me.' then she looks up at me and smiles 'Since I've been stuck in this fucking place, so close to you all the time, you're the only person that has made me remotely happy.'

I'm lost for words, staring across at her confused. 'I love Naomi' it's pathetic, and even though I shouldn't care it hurts to watch her face fall.

'I know' she sighs. 'I've known from the start'

'I really need to get going now' I mutter, awkwardly collecting my things.

'I miss you.' She admits 'and Effy, I miss my fucking friends'

'You're hardly what I call a friend Karen' Effy scoffs, appearing behind me holding a bowl of porridge 'So you can pretty much fuck off our dinner table now' she smiles sweetly

'Eff...'

'It's fine' Karen says, picking up her dinner tray.

'Karen!' I shout, before she leaves. She turns around 'Me and Eff were going to try one of those wank art classes Miss Reid is putting on, they're a couple of members short so...'

'I'll be there.' She smiles before walking away.

'What the fuck Emily?' I shrug at her, hoping this also won't turn to shit.


	17. Chapter 18

**SO when I started this story a whole 2 years ago!? I kind of had a direction and I already knew the ending of the story before I wrote the beginning. Well we're at that point now where my idea from 2 years ago can kick into place so the chapters are going to be flying out!**

**Thank you for your patience**

**Thank you for taking time to read**

**Thank you for your lovely reviews**

'So what do you reckon it'll be like then?' Effy asked as we waited aside one of the empty staff rooms that had been turned into some kind of cheap looking art centre 'The group circling some naked fat woman as we paint her holding an apple?'

I laughed, scrunching my face up in disgust at the image Effy had just put into my mind. 'God I hope not' I frowned, actually hoping we weren't going to be painting any old looking or overweight women in the buff.

'Thought you wouldn't mind, your type of thing naked birds isn't it?' I elbow her in the ribs as a laugh escapes her mouth. We're too busy wrestling each other in the semi packed corridor that we don't notice the cheerful presence approach us.

'Hey guys,' I push Effy away gently, both turning around to see a smiling Karen with an amused smirk upon her lips.

'Oh so you actually turned up then' Effy mutters slyly, I frown again

'Eff—'

She shrugs, silently promising to leave it alone. Karen's smile falters a little before she catches my eye, forcing her lips into a cheerful smile again 'So this should be fun' I genuinely smile, rolling my eyes at her sarcasm

'Yeah, I'm sure giving a group of con's paint brushes and unlimited paint will turn out great'

'Well, I'm sure that—'

'Kaz, what're you doing here girl?' I instantly freeze against the wall when that voice pierces through the corridor. The voice belonging to Tracy Edwards, the wards biggest bitch and homophobe, Karen's smile drops for real this time, I feel Effy tense with protectiveness next to me.

'Just the art sessions' Karen replies, keeping her eyes on me.

'Oh they're forcing you to do that bullshit too? Apparently all my breaks are dropped if I don't go to this fucking thing' finally Tracy eyes me and Effy quietly standing with Karen, she smirks, eyes wavering back over to Karen 'Should be fun now you're in here too though, cause a bit of mayhem eh?'

Karen just smiles awkwardly, constantly trying to catch my eyes that are currently cemented to my shoes. 'Sit next to me yeah? Haven't seen you in days'

Tracy's already walking into the class, Karen slowly lagging behind her as she throws me guilt ridden eyes. 'She won't change Em' Effy whispers, I sigh sadly.

'Actually,' Karen says, stopping Tracy and making her turn in the door way 'I was going to sit with Emily and Eff today'

Tracy laughs, like actually laughs in our faces. She continues to do so until she see's that Karen isn't actually laughing along with her. 'You can't be serious?'

'Emily actually invited me so—'

'So suicidal slut and the dirty dyke are suddenly your best friends?'

'Watch your fucking mouth, bitch' Effy launches forward I roughly grab her t-shirt, making sure there is a barrier between her and the larger older woman. 'Come on Em, let's get in there yeah? There's a bad smell around here.'

'That's right Elizabeth, take her in before she tries to _snog _me'

'Would you just for once in your fucking life shut the fuck up?' Karen suddenly shouts, squaring up to the bitch in question. I notice the smallest of smirks take place on Effy's lips as we both stand back to watch it unfold. Tracy's about to open her mouth but Karen carries on.

'Emily's a lesbian, get over it. Look around Tracy, 50% of the people in here are also gay. I wish you would just back the fuck off for once and leave her alone' suddenly there are a burst of cheer and laughter around us, 20 of the girls surrounding the confrontation that has just gone on.

Tracy looks around, scowl plastered firmly on her face. Chorus of whispers in the corridor _'She looks like she's about to cry' 'Never seen big bad Tracy with nothing to say'_

'You'll fucking pay for this Mclair' Karen doesn't flinch 'I swear.'

* * *

'You didn't have to do that' I approach Karen during kitchen duty; it was her turn to wash cutlery and dishes used after lunch time. The canteen was basically empty when I spotted her collecting plates.

She turns around smiling 'I think I had to, she can't speak to you like that'

'I should have said something, after all it was all aimed at _me_'

'I don't want her to hurt you.' She suddenly admits, cursing herself quietly when the awkward tension from the past through days appears again 'sorry.'

'Just thanks, yeah?' I quickly state.

Thankfully Naomi catches the right time to walk over to us, breaking the awkward Karen tension and somehow intensifying it more. She smiles tightly at Karen, before turning to me.

'I'm, off home early tonight... so erm, just wanted to say goodnight'

'Oh' I smile, loving how Naomi tries to keep up her prison guard act in front of Karen, who's also awkwardly squirming at the side of us. 'I'll see you tomorrow then?'

It's hard fighting the urgh to not go in for a proper kiss, but I've gotten used to half arsed goodbyes and acting completely emotionless towards Naomi in front of people.

'I think if you two don't kiss you'll end up bursting'

Naomi's eyes widen in alarm, breathe catches in my throat. 'It's a secret yeah? For all I'm concerned it's got nothing to do with me. The cameras in the kitchen are also bust this week, so take advantage yeah?'

I'm prepared for Naomi to storm out of there, for her to send Karen to isolation, but she does the unexpected. 'Duties are cut short, permission to go back to your break' she smiles genuinely then, reaching over to carefully grasp my hand 'Thank you, Karen'

* * *

'I can't believe you just fucked me against a fridge' Naomi exhales, trying to catch her breath, my fingers barely out of her before she's pulling me in for a sloppy sex filled kiss. She moans as I gently start to suck on her neck.

'There are plenty of places I'm planning to fuck you Miss Campbell'

'Oh yeah?' she bites her lip sexily, hungry eyes scanning my face. 'Where else Fitch?'

'Well, I don't want to be too filthy, but...' I whisper, she giggles 'preferably a bed one day?'

She laughs, retrieving fixing her bra back into place. 'With champagne, and strawberries and—'

'I'm being serious, I can't wait to get out of here, and for us to just be together, like a normal couple and do normal things, like... shop for curtains and shit'

'Shop for curtains?' she lets out a strained laugh 'strange things you dream about' she smiles.

'I love you'

'I love you too' she kisses me lazily, running her fingers through my hair. 'I've never felt this way before' she whispers, for a second I almost see fear in her eyes, but it quickly changes, so I tell myself I must have been mistaken.

* * *

'Eff, you awake?'

'Well, if I wasn't before I am now' she whispers into the cold dark night, I smile to myself, eyes set on the ceiling.

'I think Karen's in love with me.' it stays silent then, I roll my eyes knowing that the brunette has probably just fallen asleep like she has a million times during our nightly conversations before.

'You _think _Karen's in love with you?!' I jump, Effy's head suddenly popping up onto my bunk, confusion written all over her face as she climbs into my bunk, getting comfortable in the bed next to me. 'Are you going to explain why you think this?'

'She kissed me and said she couldn't stop thinking about me'

'What?! When?! Why don't I know about any of this?'

'I'm so fucking confused Eff...' I whisper.

'Wait; are you in love with her?'

I sigh. 'No, and that's the problem, because I don't want to hurt her.'

'Karen's a big girl Emily, I'm sure she understands. Sometimes feeling aren't mutual, she'll have to get over it

* * *

'How's your week been?'

Me and Katie where doing our usual phone call every night, it was lucky that I didn't really keep in contact with anyone else because no way would Katie allow them to use my one phone call a day allowance on anybody but her, tonight was different though. Getting conversation out of her tonight was like getting water out of cement.

'Okayish, little bit boring like' she replies distantly, I frown.

'How's james?'

'Same little perve' she replies, a couple of words again.

'You're being a little quiet tonight'

'Am I?' she replies, I roll my eyes to nobody

'Yeah... are you alright?'

'I'm fine, Emily' she reassures me, but she's anything but fine, usually I have to tell her to shut up because she could talk my ears off for hours.

'You know you can tell me anything, right?'

'I saw Naomi last night' she says after a moment of silence.

'You did? Where?' I ask intrigued, I know Naomi got off work early last night because she did an earlier shift, but she didn't actually say she had anywhere to go, and I didn't ask because she's her own person and I'm locked up in here.

'At Bar Red in town' she mutters

'At a bar?' I swallow hard; you don't go to a bar alone.

'She was with some guy Emily...' I close my eyes, 100's of unwanted images roaming through my mind.

'What?' I ask.

'I snuck out before she saw me, they looked pretty friendly Emily'

'Katie...' I mutter, not wanting her to carry on.

'I'm sorry, Em.'

**XXXXXX**

'Are you not out the closet?' I walk into her office without knocking, she's behind her desk, glasses perched on the tip of her nose and she looks over whatever documents are on her desk.

'What the hell?' she asks, walking over to the door and having a quick look around before closing it over.

'Is that why you haven't told anybody outside here about us?' I demand an answer, she scoffs

'Is it why you don't like to talk about the future? Because you're scared I'll get out and force you to-'

'Fucksake Emily, people are fully aware I'm into women, believe me' she states, sitting back on her desk chair, ripping the glasses from her nose and placing them on the table. 'What's wrong with you?'

'Last night, was it your brother?'

'My brother? Stop being so fucking cryptic please!' she states, ripping her temple with her thumbs.

'The guy you were at the bar with...' I mutter. She quickly looks up

'How did you—'

'Katie is a socialite' I explain she sighs slowly.

'I would have told you... eventually'

'Told me what? What's there to tell?' I ask, nervously playing with my hands.

'His names Governor Davis' she looks up, biting her lip nervously, I shrug, the name meaning nothing. 'He runs the London trainee Programme, I told you about' I nod, remembering this exact conversation 'I got in Emily'

'You got in?' Happiness fills my face, until I remember what this actually means.

'Dad let me apply, actually told me I was ready, so I applied... and I'm in'


End file.
